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Name: aliauthor (Signed) · Date: 08/22/07 22:59 · For: Chapter 1: In Which The Stage Is Set

you have certainly outdone yourself, very different from your humor peices but beautifully written. I can't wait to read more.

(Ted Tonks! Oh, you hit the nail on the head, my friend! I'd like to imagine this is the way it was after the seventh book. marvelous)

Author's Response: Haha, except Remus and Tonks and Fred mysteriously survive in my universe... but you know, I did guess well when it came to Ted's name! I'm so glad you like it.

Name: Oppungo (Signed) · Date: 08/22/07 7:50 · For: Chapter 5: In Which Christmas Isn't Really All That Jolly
Nice beginning, loved the description that set the scene for the chapter really well. All your description in this chapter was really well done actually, from what the characters were wearing Christmas!style to all the emotions nearer the end.

Oh no! Tyrone hasn't turned up for his sessions with Emma - I was looking forward to seeing that! I can't say I blame him - maybe his not talking to Emma will make her realise that she actually misses him...?

Concrit: I didn't really like the fact that you had "Despite the grave events lately, the five friends were all in high spirits as they packed their trunks to return to Number Seven, Griffin Circle on Christmas Eve." as it's own paragraph - in fact, I wasn't particularly a fan of the sentence itself. It just seemed like it could have been put with something else, like relevant to another part, and perhaps worded differently. Sorry, I'm not really explaining this too well! It just seemed too much like information you wanted the reader to have rather than just the natural flow of the story. /me being odd.

Ooh, Haley's mean! *giggles* (With her saying Ted'll marry Ivy) I love these little details where you show how they are fourteen, and how like all fourteen year olds would probably get more than a little embarrassed at comments like that! I think that's the great thing about this story - you haven't rushed any of the relationships, as they are still young - but old enough to have the feelings, just feel a little awkward on acting on them! You're building up a really good foundation for feelings and ships without rushing it, which I think is so fantastic. For lets face it, any relationship fourteen year olds have won't last - I know mine didn't! And that's the way it should be - just testing things out, sort of. Having them all getting into really deep relationships right now would be something I'd hate to read. (Now that I've said that I bet the next chapter will be something like: Ted: Ivy, marry me! Now that I've been bitten I realise you can't let the ones you love get away! Ivy: Oh Ted, I thought you'd never ask! I knew from the moment we met that we were meant to be with every fibre of my being! *gigglesnorts* No - I have faith in you, Schmergo!)

It was a nice touch about Ted remembering what Ivy's father had said, rather than just having it stated in narrative. That's another thing that I like a lot about this fic, as it really shows a lot about all the characters. And aww, about Ted's voice changing! That really made me smile - again, great touch at showing their age!

Again, brilliant description of when Haley goes outside. I really liked how you had Jordan calling out for Haley to stop instead of one of the others, as you showed his three dimensionalness, and that even if he can be a moody git sometimes, he is still Haley's brother, and he does care.

I was impressed by Ron's characterisation in this chapter - that showed how your writing has improved from even just a few chapters ago! I thought he was spot on here, what with his gestures when he spoke and his speech itself. All the children's reactions to Ted's accident was very well done as well - from the night before when they protest about going to sleep to when they actually see him.

I really enjoyed when Ivy thought of all the different scenarios of how Ted could have been compared to how he was - it shows a lot about his character, and how the incident could have come to many different conclusions. This whole chapter showed so much about Ted's character, from his remembering little things Ivy's said about her father, to his Gryffindor action of saving Haley to how he dealt with all the consequences. He really does sound like a great guy - a true Gryff.

Ivy's present to Ted was just adorable! *cooes* And I just adored Ted's "And as for my bites, your mum can tell you that girls love a guy with a scar on his forehead." I thought that was brilliant! *giggles* So in the next chapter Ted's going to have to beware of spiked chocolate and love potions everywhere, huh?! (And how many of those will be from Haley and Emma, trying to get Ted and Ivy together?!)

And I'm afraid you've convinced me of the Ted/Ivy ship that all your reviewers seem to be obsessively sailing! It's your own fault, Schmergo, with all those lovely little details, how could you not? Like with Ivy knowing Ted's smell, the surprise of the hand holding, how they just think of each other. Very cute, especially as it's natural, and not rushed.

Another great chapter - I see the next one's in queue, so I'm looking forward to that! (Although I'm not sure how long we'll have to wait - mine's been in queue for nearly two weeks now! Ah well - at least we know the mods are doing a good and thorough job, even it takes a little while - go mods! I must add that this pro-mods parenthesis was not encouraged by any mods, nor was I blackmailed by any mod, especially not Rachel, who knows far too much about me for my own good.) (It actually wasn't! =p ) Keep up the great work!

Author's Response: Oh, thank you for your beautiful review! Don't worry, you will see more Tyrone-Emma interaction in the next several chapters. And I'm glad you like the way Ivy and Ted are playing out... though I'm going to have to take out the marriage proposal in the next chapter. (Not. ^_^) And I guess since it's fairly obvious, I'll just say that you were right on both counts about Ivy and Ted-- they are really good friends, but in their fourth year (ie. the scope of this story) they start getting... *feelings* for each other, so you were right at the beginning when you said they might just be really good friends. But you were also right when you said that you believe in the Ivy/Ted ship.

Name: Noel Weasley (Signed) · Date: 08/21/07 16:43 · For: Chapter 6: In Which Ted Has Quite A Bad Hair Day
Hey, Schmerg! Hows things? Well, I'm just sitting at my computer, waiting for the Mods to validate this chapter! Go Mods, Go! Gosh, it seems like forever!

Oh, and thanks for getting that flying voldy stuck in my head. for the past week or so, every time i have a moment of peace, i end up creaking up and having others look at me strangely. They knew i was weird and insane, but laughing at nothing, well....


Author's Response: Haha, hey! I'm a bit annoyed at the mods myself. I know I submitted this chapter seven days ago, though, so I can't complain-- I'm sure it'll be up by tomorrow. The Flying Voldy cracked me up, too, as did this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i6PK9Z1lKok. Dude. It's called "A Harry Potter Public Service Announcement.," and my brother and I watched it about eight times in a row.

Name: VeniaTaint (Signed) · Date: 08/20/07 8:35 · For: Chapter 5: In Which Christmas Isn't Really All That Jolly
Oh, wonderful! (well, not actually, because of Ted,) but the story is lovely, and so different from your usual ones. Perhaps an appearance of Theo Nott and friend would make a delightful suprise as well! and congratulations on the chracter development, it's fantastic!

Author's Response: Thank you very much! I'm glad you like it, after reading your wonderful reviews on my Theo stories. Actually (and you're going to hate me for this) Theo and November are a little bit dead in this story. It's addressed more in later installments, but their daughter is quite a brat... still, you can always expect more Theo in other stories!

Name: The_Weied_Muggle (Signed) · Date: 08/19/07 7:37 · For: Chapter 5: In Which Christmas Isn't Really All That Jolly
Schmergo you are my favourite author and you should be in the top ten. Seriously. YAHOO YOUR STORIES ROCK!

Author's Response: Double posts happen to the best of us... also me.

Name: The_Weied_Muggle (Signed) · Date: 08/19/07 7:36 · For: Chapter 5: In Which Christmas Isn't Really All That Jolly
Schmergo you are my favourite author and you should be in the top ten. Seriously. YAHOO YOUR STORIES ROCK!

Author's Response: Oh, you made my day! Thanks so much!

Name: Helios Sol (Signed) · Date: 08/16/07 8:57 · For: Chapter 5: In Which Christmas Isn't Really All That Jolly
It was sentimental in the beginning and last parts if you ask me. Did you plan on Lupin's kid being named Ted? Because, that's just kind of creepy. You wrote this before DH, didn't you? 9.5/10

Author's Response: Yep, wrote this WAAAY before DH. Since he was named after his grandfather, it didn't seem that random to me... especially since Remus and Nymphadora are such weird names, they probably wanted their son to have as normal a name as possible! Plus I love that name. It's so... cuddly sounding.

Name: Helios Sol (Signed) · Date: 08/16/07 8:46 · For: Chapter 4: In Which Tyrone Thomas Does Not Have One of His Better Days
Hmmm....that would be a rather bad day.
I really butchered "make" on my earlier review. Oh well. I have found that box finally! There's some minor editing to do, but then, I can send it! I hope! 9/10

Author's Response: HOORAY FOR BOX-FINDING! And yes, it would be a rather bad day to find one's mother has just died, wouldn't it?

Name: I_LUV_MOONY (Signed) · Date: 08/15/07 17:56 · For: Chapter 5: In Which Christmas Isn't Really All That Jolly
Darn, I was really looking forward to that 'good Christmas snog'. :D Great chapter. I feel so sorry for Ted, though. And Haley and Ivy, now that I think about it. Haley's got survivor's guilt, and Ivy's obviously going to worry more than the others because it was her biological dad who ordered the attack. This was a very serious chapter (quite unlike you!), but it's my favorite. At least, it's my favorite until Ted and Ivy kiss. :D

Author's Response: Thanks! Hehehe, they're only fourteen, and they strike me as the type of people who take things slow-- Ivy is quite conservative! Yeah, this is a serious chapter, but I think Ted's sense of humour and optimism kind of balance it out.

Name: Ankh of the night (Signed) · Date: 08/15/07 11:42 · For: Chapter 5: In Which Christmas Isn't Really All That Jolly
Awwwww, Ted/Ivy

Author's Response: Fluff ahoy! ^_^ (Wait 'till you catch next chapter...)

Name: Helios Sol (Signed) · Date: 08/15/07 10:41 · For: Chapter 3: In Which Professor Potter Takes the Reins
Still pretty good. I'm finding it hard to picture Malfoy as a mass murderer...seeing as he failed to kil Dumbeldore.

Author's Response: Yeah, I wrote this a long time ago...but then again, when Lucius died, it TOTALLY unhinged Draco. I mean, the Malfoys might hate almost everyone, but they do care about each other. He actually blew up St Mungo's instead of individually killing people, which meant he didn't have to look into his victim's eyes... and he has people kill for him, as well. He doesn't really do any of it himself!

Name: Helios Sol (Signed) · Date: 08/15/07 10:32 · For: Chapter 2: In Which Emma's Goat Is Gotten
Looks like I'm reading it...it is faster now.
I really could see the Ron being just that clueless. With Deathly Hallows out little bits become...you know....JKR shot down the Neville-Luna ship, does that mka eit important?

Author's Response: Aw, I love Ron. He's a bright and capable guy, but he can also be quite oblivious at times! Hopefully, you see more of his Auror side in later chapters. Neville and Luna... I know it's non-canon, but I'm del00sional! It is important in the third book of the trilogy, but then, I also kept Remus, Tonks, and Fred alive, so I figured I wouldn't worry about that.

Name: Valentinia (Signed) · Date: 08/14/07 16:16 · For: Chapter 5: In Which Christmas Isn't Really All That Jolly
Aw. This chapter was very cute! I enjoy the Ivy/Ted interactions! And so far this entire fic has been great! I love your OCs and I especially love the Emma/Tyrone relationship. I hope she apologizes some day! ... Anyway, great fic! I hope you update soon!

Author's Response: Thank you! That means a lot, since I love your writing. There is a lot to come for Emma and Tyrone, both good and bad, so it should be interesting to see how you like what's to come!

Name: Hedwig with a quill (Signed) · Date: 08/14/07 15:36 · For: Chapter 5: In Which Christmas Isn't Really All That Jolly
That was a very sweet chappie! A lot of Ivy/Ted in the air. Also, was it a coincidence that Remus and Tonks's baby was also called Ted in Deathly Hallows? ;P

Author's Response: Thanks, Steph! And that was NO COINCIDENCE! JK Rowling stole it from me! (No, I'm kidding. Rowling's Ted was named after his grandfather; I've just always loved that name.)

Name: SingingBird (Signed) · Date: 08/14/07 14:48 · For: Chapter 5: In Which Christmas Isn't Really All That Jolly
Aww poor Ted. :( At least he's accepting it so well. :)

Author's Response: Yeah, imagine if Jordan got bitten. 0_0 He's existential enough as is! I love Ted, though, he's so awkwardly secure.

Name: harrypotterfangirl21 (Signed) · Date: 08/14/07 14:45 · For: Chapter 5: In Which Christmas Isn't Really All That Jolly
This really surprised me, Schmergo. When I think of your stories, I think of laughing really really REALLY hard for the rest of the day. This fic, however, shows that you are a GREAT writer, no matter WHAT you are writing, humour or otherwise!
Fantastic job!!!


P.S. I think I am rather like Haley... I'm ALWAYS hyper. ^-^

Author's Response: Oh, thank you so much, Katie! I wrote this story when I was... well, I started at age twelve and finished when I was thirteen, so I'm glad you still think it's good.

Name: Noel Weasley (Signed) · Date: 08/14/07 12:35 · For: Chapter 5: In Which Christmas Isn't Really All That Jolly
Hey Schmerg! nice story! poor Ted! Two-word sentences! So, umm, yeah. so, update soon! awesome story!I support Ivy/Ted and Haley/Ted! the last one popped up in my mind this last chapter.

Flying Voldy!

Red~It's a bird, it's a plane, No! it's Voldy-Moldy! yea!

Me~No, Red! Not yea! It's 'Scream and gasp!"

Red~Make me!

Me~Fine! *attacks Red* I win!

....Red is currently in a coma....


Author's Response: I shall indeeeed update soooon. I like holding down the keeeeys on my compuuuuter! I hope Red recovers from the coma soon!

Name: The_Weied_Muggle (Signed) · Date: 08/12/07 2:35 · For: Chapter 4: In Which Tyrone Thomas Does Not Have One of His Better Days


Name: Oppungo (Signed) · Date: 08/11/07 16:37 · For: Chapter 4: In Which Tyrone Thomas Does Not Have One of His Better Days
Just a quick review for now, as I have hardly any time (and I actually left MNFF ages ago! But I've been tempted back briefly (but only briefly!) and ran across your story, and enjoyed it so much that I added it to my favourites and felt I ought to review). Do you remember me? *giggles* I'm guessing you'll say yes anyway as you'll want me to keep reviewing! =p

I must say I'm really impressed with this story, as it's really shown how you can write more than just humour (which you're wonderful at) - but of course, what's a story without humour? I love the little side line humour parts in here, it really makes this story what it is (alongside the plot, and the characters, and the - yeah, okay, well it's still a good part of the story!).

There's so much in this story that I've enjoyed, and I don't really have the time to point it all out, so you'll just have to trust that I liked an awful lot so far. I find that Emma's becoming my favourite character, as she's so real - she seems incredibly fun as well as being flawed, which I think is great, just great. I also love the dynamic she has going with Tyrone - I can see that has great potential there.

Jordan seems like a very interesting character, with so many levels that a lot of people wouldn't think of or explore in Harry Potter's children - but I think it's a high possibility, and you've shown it so well in Jordan. I also like the little cryptic clues that you've added in for the mystery!

Ted I also like - it's nice to have the quiet, more thoughtful character in the mix, as you have a lot of very outgoing characters as well, so it's a good balancing act - for in real life, loud, outgoing people can't just hang out with other loud, outgoing people - they'd drive each other mad! It's good to have Ted's perspective in there to think things through. I also like the connection he has with Ivy - and you've done it cleverly so as to make people think that they could have stronger feelings for each other, or they could simply be amazingly close best friends. Either is completely plausible. However, I'm not sure people are seeing the latter option as much!

In all honesty, I didn't really like the whole bit with Harry adopting Ivy. I just...didn't. *shrugs* I wouldn't say that it's cliché, but I just don't particularly see it - it just didn't feel spot on, which the rest of your writing did. I'm sorry - I'm pretty sure that's just me, but there you go. That may because I haven't taken to Ivy as much as I have some of the other characters - I like her, but some of the others just interest me more!

This review wasn't very chapter specific - or specific at all really, and I'm sorry. But one thing I must say that I particularly loved was all the banter and conversation, such as "Maybe he really did break a nail?" I think I like it so much because it all flows and sounds natural, which is so important.

I really must go now, but just to say that I think this fic (and series) will go really well - keep up the great work!


Author's Response: Wow, this is the longest review I've ever had! And how could I forget you, you're... you're the author of "Dear Dumby!" (Hehe, that's always been one of my most favourite fanfics.) Thank you so much! Jordan is indeed interesting, and you don't see anything from his perspective until Chapter Eight, so that keeps things mysterious! And Ted is a character of whom I'm particularly fond... he gets to play a much larger role in the next two chapters. I'm glad you mentioned that about their relationship, because it's definitely something that could go either way. The Harry/Ivy adoption thing irked me when I revisited the story (having written it two years ago before reading ANY fanfiction or even knowing it existed), but since it's essential to the plot line, I couldn't think of a way to edit it out! Ivy is probably my least favourite as well (although I do love her) because she's shy and serious-ish and vulnerable, and I am none of those things. But most of my friends like her best, so it's interesting to see how different people react to her. (For example, most people hate Emma.) Thanks again!

Name: Winged Artemis (Signed) · Date: 08/10/07 11:57 · For: Chapter 4: In Which Tyrone Thomas Does Not Have One of His Better Days
Awww! That was so sad. I feel really bad for Tyrone now.

I got a really funny picture in my head when you mentioned Napoleon Dynamite. Haha, I'm glad that's gone!

Anyway, excited for the next one!

Author's Response: Thanks, Hannah! I always like hearing from you! Yeah, I feel bad for Tyrone, too... now working on the third 'book' in the trilogy, it's kind of weird for me to look back at the first one once again and see what Tyrone was like as a fourth year! I'd almost forgotten!

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