Reviewer: aliauthor
Date: 07/16/07 18:56
Chapter: Chapter 1: Letters and Customers

Very good! There are a few typos (in Marmara's description, it says 'she wasn't unpopular with the boys either' shouldn't it be girls?) and needs a little sentence structure work, but great storyline so far.

can't wait for the rest, hope you get it in before the queue closes for the 7th book!

Author's Response: Thank you!! I need to re-edit it, and I'm on vacation right now and don't have the time. It will be up soon!

Reviewer: Pissenoffanis
Date: 07/14/07 22:34
Chapter: Chapter 1: Letters and Customers

Haha oh god Crabbe and Goyle actually fell for the gullible thing? Oh deary me :)))

Author's Response: Yup...what are we gonna do with those two?? :)

Reviewer: JustLikeHermione77
Date: 07/12/07 18:46
Chapter: Chapter 1: Letters and Customers

UPDATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Author's Response: Keep your pants on, I'm working on it!! :)

Reviewer: hmsoctopus
Date: 07/11/07 23:32
Chapter: Chapter 1: Letters and Customers

That was good, but bit too much emphasis on how they were all 15, and that they had crushes on Cedric and george. Good fic, though! :)

Author's Response: Thanks!

Reviewer: abigail95
Date: 07/07/07 20:30
Chapter: Chapter 1: Letters and Customers

Awesome story! It was really good.

Author's Response: Why thank you!

Reviewer: lily_potter13
Date: 07/05/07 10:07
Chapter: Chapter 1: Letters and Customers

this is your first well welcome to writing fan fic i like this story so far so if u keep writing i can like it more no i havent done any writing of my own but its nice to welcome someone to thier first fan fic

Author's Response: Thank you!!!

Reviewer: Roy0Bean
Date: 06/27/07 4:37
Chapter: Chapter 1: Letters and Customers

I like it is there going to be more?

Reviewer: Roy0Bean
Date: 06/27/07 4:37
Chapter: Chapter 1: Letters and Customers

I like it is there going to be more?

Author's Response: Most definitely. I'm working on it, don't you fret!

Reviewer: potter_freak579
Date: 06/14/07 14:11
Chapter: Chapter 1: Letters and Customers

Its good but I think you should write more too it :]

Author's Response: There's more...I just have to edit it.

Reviewer: Marmara
Date: 06/13/07 17:07
Chapter: Chapter 1: Letters and Customers

I LOVE IT!! Hurry and edit the second chapter!! I LOVE THE MARMARA CHARACTER!! W0000000!!!

~Marg

Author's Response: You are such a dork. OK, ok, I will, but I have SUPER computer restrictions now, so I can't spend a whole lot of time online. I'll do my best, though!

Reviewer: DrunkenBarWench
Date: 06/10/07 22:23
Chapter: Chapter 1: Letters and Customers

Actually, I really like most of the characters. I think it'll be interesting to see more of them in later chapters.

And for a first fic this is awesome!

Get to work on the rest of those chapters, yo!

Author's Response: Thank you so much!!!! I'm up to chapter 14--I've just spent the past 2 days rereading them, and I need to seriously edit them, but I'll get them up ASAP!!

Reviewer: finiiii
Date: 06/10/07 21:40
Chapter: Chapter 1: Letters and Customers

yeah, pretty good! But the girls seem like Mary-Sues to me, no offense. Hopefully this'll start getting funnier soon!! Good job!

Author's Response: They DO get better, I promise! Thank you!

Reviewer: pandora123
Date: 06/10/07 16:43
Chapter: Chapter 1: Letters and Customers

this was good! can't wait for more!
Best of Luck
pandora1234

Author's Response: Thank you so much!! I've got 14 chapters written, they just have to be edited!

Reviewer: CowGirlHPFan
Date: 06/10/07 15:27
Chapter: Chapter 1: Letters and Customers

Great!!! When Will it be funny? Good start!! *~*CowGirlHPFan*~*

Author's Response: Thank you! Well, it gets funnier as it goes along, but becomes REALLY funny around Chapter 7-ish. There's funny moments in between, though. I'm working on updating as fast as I can, so hopefully it won't be too long!

Reviewer: JustLikeHermione77
Date: 06/09/07 17:18
Chapter: Chapter 1: Letters and Customers

good start!! please update soon!!! but one question: why would ANYONE have a crush on NEVILLE LONGBOTTOM?!?! just wondering!!

Author's Response: THAT'S A GOOD QUESTION!! All of these people are based off of my friends, so it was HER decision, not mine :)

Author's Response: Oh, and thank you!

Reviewer: dumbledorefluertwins
Date: 06/09/07 14:16
Chapter: Chapter 1: Letters and Customers

I don't want to be mean, but I find all of the girls very Mary-Sue-ish. Especially scince the main character is called Serena **gags**.

I must say, though, for your first fic it's very good. Just... take the characters to the character clinic on the forums.

~Evie

Author's Response: Thank you for your opinions. They get more developed as the story goes on (it is only the first chapter)

Author's Response: Also, I just think you ought to know, but Serena is named after me. Just FYI.

You must login (register) to review.
Information
Find out everything you need to know about the site right here.


We have stories and authors in this archive.

:

RSS
Choose Theme:
SOCIAL MEDIA
     
MOST RECENT
The Green Knight Rises by Kerichi 6th-7th Years
In Creevey Wizard Comics, the Green Knight aids those in need under the cloak...
Friends and Foes by Northumbrian 3rd-5th Years
It took Harry and his friends years to discover who killed Colin Creevey. Ginny...
Not From Others by FloreatCastellum 6th-7th Years
She may not have been able to join Harry, Ron and Hermione, but Ginny refuses...
FEATURED
Wild Card by ToBeOrNotToBeAGryffindor 6th-7th Years
It was going to happen eventually: Oliver Wood had to retire. But when the decision...
Half-life by welshdevondragon 3rd-5th Years
Neville has the rest of his life ahead of him, but all he can do is look back...
Skinny Love by xxbabewithbrainsxx 6th-7th Years
“I’ve always been chubby. Admit it.” “You’ve never been skinny...
Tigerlily by Maple_and_PheonixFeather 3rd-5th Years
You promised yourself you'd never hurt her, but there are times when you wonder...
Astriferous by Padfoot11333 6th-7th Years
Merope Gaunt has never been celestial.Nominated for a 2014 QSQ - Best Dark/Angst. Nominated...
CATEGORIES