Reviews For Hidden Behind Silk
Reviewer: Kcharles
Date: 12/09/08 18:18
Chapter: Hidden Behind Silk.

I loved how you wrote in second person. Not many people can pull that off!

I liked how you used description in the story, too. There was enough for us to feel like we were actually there, but it wasn't too boring either.

The way the Purebloods talked was a bit strange, but I can imagine that they would actually talk like that. You could also tell that they were in love, just by the way they talked to eachother.

I'd love to see more of the story someday!

Author's Response: :) I'm glad you liked it! Thanks for the review!

Reviewer: beauty and brains
Date: 05/13/08 20:38
Chapter: Hidden Behind Silk.

This was wonderful, even in its simplicity. I could really feel the woman's frustration at her mother and at the rules set for her. You did a great job of bringing her feelings into the light so as to where as a reader I could really understand them. And the little piece of Heaven at the end was beautiful. Great job!

Author's Response: Thnaks :) I'm glad you liked it!

Reviewer: Euphrates
Date: 01/20/08 16:01
Chapter: Hidden Behind Silk.

This is so well done. I love the way you wrote with the second person point of view. Not many people use it and it's uncommon, but I think you did a really good job with it. In some places it sounded a bit strange (simply because I'm not used to it) but, overall, it flowed really well.

The way you described things was great, as well - especially the dress and the description of the place behind the wall. I love how you used fragments at that part: "A weeping willow, a bench. Soft grass beneath your feet." Description tends to be long-winded and lengthy, but this was different and just as vivid.

The only thing I'd like to critique is the dialogue in some places - it seemed a little too wordy for the way people talk. Of course, this could be just the stilted way Purebloods talk, but I just thought I'd mention it. Otherwise, great job.

--Kate


Author's Response: Ooh! I'm glad it worked! The second POV, and the description. I have to patience for long description (unless it bounces up my word count substantially when needed.... :p) But yes, it is just because of pureblood-ness....:D

Reviewer: Heiress_of_Insanity_
Date: 01/01/08 19:06
Chapter: Hidden Behind Silk.

Yet another wonderful second-person fic! You truly are talented (geez, I sound like a sap...=D) The one thing I want to know, though, is why exactly would her family kill Gareth (that's his name, right)? Because it sounded like this was a present-day fic. *wonders*

I loved the description of the dress; my mouth was watering and I wanted desperately to try it on! Or at least draw it. It sounded wonderful. *sighs* Another delightful fic, I loved it!~

H_o_I_

Author's Response: lolol. I am absalutely obsessed with that kind of dress, so I couldn;t help it! I'm so happy you think it was well done! HEr family would kill Gareth cause they're stickler Pure-Bloods, with dark / death-eater ties. And he's muggleborn. If they were caught together.... <3

Reviewer: MrsRuebeusHagridDursley
Date: 06/20/07 22:18
Chapter: Hidden Behind Silk.

Wow, that was really good! I thought your portrayal of the characters were excellent! I only wish that this was a bit longer. I would like to hear more of the main chatacter's back story, as well as the masquerade.



I only have one little nit-pick.



"You were watching him. You tell me why."



I don't think it sounds right I wounld omit the second you So it would be: "You were watching him. Tell me why."



I loved this story, it was really amazing.

Author's Response: :D thank you so so so much!

Reviewer: Crows
Date: 06/17/07 20:45
Chapter: Hidden Behind Silk.

I love it. Nothing else to say.

Author's Response: Thank you!

You must login (register) to review.
Information
Find out everything you need to know about the site right here.


We have stories and authors in this archive.

:

RSS
Choose Theme:
SOCIAL MEDIA
     
MOST RECENT
Makers of Fine Wands by CanisMajor 1st-2nd Years
Ollivander of Croton arrives in Athens in 382 BC with big dreams, noneof which...
James and Me by Northumbrian 6th-7th Years
Annabel is having a bad day. Her sudden and unexpected meeting with a face from...
Tom Riddle and the Cave of Living Waters by alittletiefling 6th-7th Years
What would happen if Tom Marvolo Riddle had been adopted by well-meaning squibs?...
FEATURED
It Takes Two to Tango by lucca4 3rd-5th Years
They cannot keep doing this; it is only a matter of whose resolve will break...
In The Heat Of The Morning by welshdevondragon 3rd-5th Years
Summary: In the heat of the morning, Katie and Leanne lie in the grounds...
Can't Fight the Moonlight by Acacia Carter 6th-7th Years
A life-changing disaster at work drives Neville Longbottom to seek aid from...
The History Teacher by iLuna17 6th-7th Years
Maybe he didn’t just love history, maybe he loved being a history teacher.
white on white by Padfoot11333 6th-7th Years
Three vignettes about scars, love, and sex.
CATEGORIES