short but sweet
I loved it!
I loved it. You should write more.
I agree with what FeatherTrader said in her review. Some Dramione fics can seem rather forced and somewhat OOC. That's why it so hard to find a good, well written one that stays within the realms of what we know of Draco and Hermione.
I love this very descriptive fic. I love the way that Draco finds peace in the way Hermione sleeps. Its as if his heart is trying to find some rest of its own. But I also like the mixture of fear that he displays for being caught with her. But not "caught" in the sense that he's holding her hand, but caught in the notion of what people would think of his pompas ass for falling in love with a Mudblood. Especially the Mudblood that he is most vocal about.
And then in the end, when he tries to get her hand back, cause he desperately wants to feel that warmth again. Very moving and touching.
I'm ashamed of myself for not reading this sooner.
This goes straight into my favorites.
That was really sweet.
Hey! You should make a prequel! Nice Story.
Author's Response: Thank you! I'll think about it.
*has a long list of things to write/think about...*
O my gosh!!! Your style of writing and choice of words are so great! You are a very good writer so....KEEP IT UP! ;D
Author's Response: Thank you so much!! :D
I loved this!
I particularly like the narration and description, as well as the lack of dialogue. It's all very well done. I rather enjoy fics where there is no needs for words. You've done a good job.
Author's Response: Yay! Thank you for your lovely review. :)
I just wanted to let you know that on the MNFF forums, I stumbled over your banner and I liked the look of it *giggles* and once I read the story, I realized that I simply adore this story! Its such a shame my Draco is still afraid of being discovered *sighs* Oh well, at least it was the opposite to what I expected! I thought Hermione was going to wake up and panic and tell Harry and Ron about Draco but thankfully, it didnt turn out that way :) Another thing is, that the moment I began reaqding your fic, I fell in love with your writing. Its simply divine!
Claire Voldermoretta, the Dark Lady :D
Author's Response: :) Thanks for your review! I'm glad you liked the story.
Author's Response: Thanks.
Without even attempting to justify the ship, you made it seem perfectly natural. Normally, Dramione seems forced, or Draco is written as a smarter, better looking match than Ron. This one-shot, however, just made it seem simply right.
Ahhh. The old Head Boy and Head Girl share the same dormitory cliche. Well, as opposed to the cliche as I am, I don’t see how else this one-shot would have come into play. So, I suppose that justifies it.
Nonetheless, the scene in itself was perfect. Draco fearing being caught so much as holding hands with Hermione, although he yearned for her warm touch to take him back. I really liked the thought and guilt process you put Draco through. It was wonderful characterization on Draco’s part. Most Dramione fics don’t include Draco’s pride, or just reason it away. But you turned Draco’s pride into embarrassment, and then need. Wonderful job.
Every night he would come down, bid good night to the moon as she pulled her black blanket over her silvery head, and say hello to the stars as they peeked out of their sleep, but mostly, he'd sit and watch Hermione as she danced with them in her dream trance.
Wonderful analogy with the night sky and its inhabitants. It kind of introduced us to a more poetic side of Draco, which was a necessity for him to realistically appreciate Hermione’s beauty and serene look as she slept. However, I’d almost say this should be broken into two sentences beginning at the ‘but,’ since it seems like so many rich thoughts pushed into one sentence. I think separating it into two would make it seem a bit clearer.
He wasn’t sure if he could handle her finding out about his caring gaze, his wistful smiles, and his aching heart.
I just have to say it. Awwww! I’ve never seen someone handle so much pride with so much elegance. I especially like your word choice in the latter part of the sentence. It really adds a lot to the final meaning.
His breath got stuck in his throat as she turned in her sleep; his blood chilled at the thought of being caught.
Can you say ‘guilty pleasures’? I really like this hand-in-the-cookie-jar image this gives Draco. He knows it’s something he shouldn’t be doing, but yet it doesn’t stop him from doing it. There’s no excuses, no regrets, no promises; just a hope that he doesn’t get caught. Incredibly perfect.
Overall, wonderful one-shot. I thought it was simply brilliant. I take it the class went well? =]
Author's Response: Oh my god, what an amazing review! This totally made my day! And that's hard to do, because I'm in some serious toe-stubbed pain. Anyways, as far as the cliche, I was supposed to take a crindge-worthy cliche and try to turn it around. Which is the only reason I used it. I normally have such distaste for such cliches! But I'm glad you think I covered it well. The class went fantastically well, and I'm so glad you enjoyed reading this one-shot as much as I enjoyed reading this review. Thanks so much!
That is a very sweet story. i just love the idea of Hermione melting the ice cold heart of Draco Malfoy. Very well thought and very well written.
Author's Response: Thank you very much. =D
This was so sweet. I'm left to wonder what will happen in the morning when they wake up. Will he be forced to tell the whole school? or will he simply act like the whole thing never happened? I loved that she took his hand, it was so perfect. Really amazing job!
Author's Response: Thanks Haylee! I hadn't really even thought about the next day. Hmm. *ponders*. Thanks for the review!
Wow! I really like this one-shot. It's very short, but is still just as powerful.
Your portrayal of Draco in this story truely is fantastic. It shows that other side of him that we so rarely see. And yeat, he's still uneasy and embarressed about letting that side of him show.
And your writing is so beautiful! It just ties the whole story together. It's like reading a poem in story format.
You did a vry good job with this, so be proud!
Author's Response: =] Thank you so much!
that was really cute!
Author's Response: Thanks
Author's Response: Thanks!
Ooh, Sarah, I absolutely adored this one shot. I believed I had read it before, but then I went back and saw it was from our class!
The way you've portrayed Draco in this story is amazing. You should be very proud of this one shot. When you use words such as 'Slytherin Prince', you're bound to get some attention with this one; I love it!
Draco was frozen. Frozen in time, frozen in this moment so imperfect to his eyes that it was perfect, frozen in the warmth that Hermione's hand gave him.
I like how you've named the fiction after these sentences, or rather, these sentences after the fiction. It's really cute how he froze because a sleepy Hermione looked at him; it's so sweet. I think you have officially converted me to Dramione.
On the other hand, I am a bit confused when I re-read this:
Ever since he had become Head Boy, and began rooming with Hermione, it seemed as if the entire situation was an inviting new experience for him.
When you say 'began rooming with Hermione', wouldn't someone else already find out about that? Wouldn't Dumbledore or McGonagall find out that a boy and girl were rooming together and take that privilege away? Or am I just misunderstanding something? Because towards the end you talk about the owl and how fearful Draco is on the school finding out about their love. Misunderstanding or mistake?
Suddenly, a distant sound cracked the silence and caused Draco to fall back in fear. He looked towards the window and saw an owl, staring at him with piercing yellow eyes. Draco felt guilty, felt afraid, as if the owl would somehow tell the rest of the school that the great Draco Malfoy was holding hands with Hermione; that the Slytherin Prince was falling, hard, for Hermione Granger.
What's funny is that I know that when I do bad things, if my cat sees me I feel bad. Here, Draco isn't necessarily crossing the line, but if he and Hermione were to get caught together then Harry and Ron would certainly have something to say about it, not to mention the entire school. It's really well-written how you portray this here. Especially when you say afterward that Draco is embarrassed.
It was SO quick, but so good. I really wish you would continue it, but I understand how it could be a stand alone.
I adore how you've ended it; the way he holds onto Hermione's fingers as she sleeps is SO sweet.
Great one shot, Sarah! I'm glad to see it up on MNFF!
Author's Response: Lindsey!! *tacklehugs* Thank you so much for this amazing review, and also for using it for the Recomend Your Fav Fic thing. Once again, I am *so* honored. Thank you so much. As far as that part, yes, they were rooming together but as you know in the Head Girl/Head Boy dormitories. People knew that they were HG/HB, but he didn't want them to find out that he watched her at night, or that he was falling for her through those nights. I hope that made sense. Thanks again!!
Sarah, Sarah, Sarah!!! You finally did a one-shot with that wonderful drabble of yours! As I said to you before, this is just so good. I quite can't find the words to describe how I feel, it's just beautiful and touching. I can feel Draco's every emotion like if I was in his heart, because you describe the scene so well. We usually assume that Draco is insensible, but I can picture him being a very sensitive guy deep inside. But it's a bit sad that even in the middle of the night, he still cares about what others would say if they saw him with Hermione. Anyway, I'm in love with your story! You did an amazing job! :)
Author's Response: Viv!! *huggles* Thanks so much, for both this review and encouraging me to turn this into a one-shot. I owe you! Thanks so much!!