MuggleNet Fan Fiction
Harry Potter stories written by fans!
Reviews For Eyes

Name: Striped Candycane (Signed) · Date: 02/29/08 12:47 · For: Lily, James and Juliana
These poems are so wonderful…I really can just see the different eyes following eachother about, and the emotions reflected in each of them. I especially liked how Draco was “little Grey”; it shows just how much he wants to be like his father, and leaves Narcissa looking so sad and blue in the background.

I also greatly enjoyed the last couple of stanzas in the first poem:

Hazel and Brown,
Go on, Together.

Green eyes,
Go on, Alone.

The image that this brings is very haunting, even though few words are used.

I also thought the formatting was interesting, what with all the capitalizations. It really intensifies the personalities of each eye, and underlines their characteristics.

Overall, these poems are short, bittersweet, and to the point: they get a lot done in a little. Thumbs up!

Name: _feather_ (Signed) · Date: 06/12/07 17:53 · For: Lily, James and Juliana
Wellll I left school early to review your poem! I would have stayed home but you know, math finals. Blagh.
I think this is a really interesting poem in that it describes the person's eyes. I think it's a bit obvious that the eyes are the most beautiful parts of anyone's body, but this poem is the first I've read about eyes. So you were very cretive.

*phew* That was formal. Seriously I loooveeeed this poem, I liked the James/Juliana one the best. i just felt more sympathetic for Lily. I almost cried ;o(

Keep writing! I want to


Author's Response: Hmm, so THAT'S why you left early. Wel, I suppose I'm glad you did! :D I'm glad you thought I was cretive, nice to know (jkjkjk). Yeah, I wonder why yu felt so sympathetic for me.. I mean Lily, of course *wink*. Thanks for reviewing, feather *hehehehehe*.

Name: siriusly_vic (Signed) · Date: 05/01/07 20:44 · For: Narcissa, Lucius and Draco
Wonderful just like all your others!!!! Great Job i like this style of poetry its very interesting. you know this is the same color combination as vic ced and sirius. gtg bye!!

Author's Response: Thanks, Vic! Vic, Ced, and Sirius... Oooh, wiiiieeeerd. I hadn'y realized that. Anyways, thanks again! PS: Keep your fingers crossed for Jordin. I don't want her out!

Name: XhayleeXblackX (Signed) · Date: 05/01/07 9:57 · For: Narcissa, Lucius and Draco
Aww, I liked this one even more. It was rather sweet. It seems really true too. 10/10

Author's Response: T-t-ten out of ten?! *gasp* I feel so special! I must agree with you, I like my Narcissa one a lot better, too.

Name: XhayleeXblackX (Signed) · Date: 05/01/07 9:55 · For: Lily, James and Juliana
Very inrtiging. I liked it. Really good job.

Author's Response: Thanks! I'm really glad you liked!

Name: FenrirG (Signed) · Date: 04/30/07 22:19 · For: Lily, James and Juliana

You already know how much I love this poem, and I'm so glad it got up! I just read your first one, too, and it's absolutely amazing. *sigh* I'm jealous!

*cough* Anyways, your style is so unique and creative... I just love it! Your unconventional take on shipping is nothing short of beautiful, and your word choice is simple yet profound. Wonderful, wonderful job--I can't wait to read more from you, abd be sure to drop me an owl if you ever need a beta again!

*hugs* Fenn

Author's Response: Fenn! Aww, you're so sweet! *huggles* I couldn't have asked for a better beta or a cooler turnip. *huggles again*

Name: Lalalalatina (Signed) · Date: 04/30/07 16:19 · For: Narcissa, Lucius and Draco
Again, another wonderful poem. Just a bit confusing. :) Thats probably just me though.

I still really like the style, with they eyes showing what is happening instead of people.

My favorite part are the last three stanzas:
Big Grey eyes,
Full of Malice.

Little Grey eyes,
Full of Trust.

Blue eyes,
Full of Sorrow.

So sad, but it really wraps things up and perfectly describes the Malfoys. So, wonderful job. Will you write another?

Author's Response: Thanks! I might write another, if the inspiration hits me. I have to think of another ship to write about, though.

Name: Euphrates (Signed) · Date: 04/30/07 9:39 · For: Narcissa, Lucius and Draco
Just so you know, I love this style of poems you have. Very interesting, so great job, on your part, for...thinking of it. (Yes, finally! The right word.) Now that I understand that every feeling/emotion/eye is capitalized, it makes much more sense to me. :D That's just because I'm unnaturally thick-headed. *grins*

I don't know if it is possible to have a favorite part/line of a poem like this. As it is so concise, and every word used is vital to the poem, and there are no extra words, it is a short, but...strong poem. No words are there to add fluff, which just adds to the...strength of this. (I cannot think of any word other than 'strong' for this.) Great job!


Author's Response: Aww, thanks Kate! You are not thickheaded, I'm just totally... erm... different (?) when it comes to poetry? Thanks for reviewing! Love ya! -Laila, who hates novacaine

Name: Queen Akilah (Anonymous) · Date: 04/29/07 1:59 · For: Lily, James and Juliana
Awwwww! Such a beautiful poem!
You must have a wonderful BETA!!!!!

Luv Melissa

Author's Response: Yeah, I had the best beta EVER! *winks*

Name: Lalalalatina (Signed) · Date: 04/17/07 21:06 · For: Lily, James and Juliana
Hmmmm, I liked how you used eyes to identify individuals. Really creative. When I first read this though, I thought of Harry and Ginny, not James and Lily, but maybe that's just me. It seems to me as if it could be either. Anyways.... nice poem. ^_^

Author's Response: *reads over poem again* I see what you mean. It does seem a bit Harry/Ginny, doesn't it? I might actually switch my Harry/Ginny and Lily/James ones, because the ships seem to work better in the other poems. Thanks for reviewing!

Name: Crows (Signed) · Date: 04/17/07 17:29 · For: Lily, James and Juliana
What an awesome poem! I highly suggest making another for a series, but it is AU...soo, it's your desicion.

Author's Response: Thank you! I actually am adding to the series, but they are totally unrelated poems. They just all have the same 'eye' thing.

Name: Euphrates (Signed) · Date: 04/17/07 14:19 · For: Lily, James and Juliana
Yay! You wrote a new poem! *huggles*

This is so sweet and sad. I felt so bad for Lily. :-( You really made me feel a lot of emotion here. Good job.

I like the way you used eyes to portray this poem - very interesting. And I'm very glad you didn't make them "flash" or "burn" or some other insane things eyes seem to be able to do in writing.

I love the little two line stanzas, and the way the last two stanzas reflect each other. Clever and powerful, in my opinion.

The capitalizations scattered throughout here were interesting, but they were a bit distracting, as I am weird that way and usually don't like random words capitalized. Here, though, the word capitalized had meaning to them, so I understood it. Words like "green", "brown", "hazel", "together", and "alone" were good capitalized, but I personally think the others could have stayed normal.

Anyways. Great job, and I'm so happy you're writing more poems.


Author's Response: Thanks

Author's Response: Whoops, sorry for the unsightly response. I was hoping it would bring out some emotion in people. Glad it did! I was capitalizing the emotions, so I didn't think they were random. But I see what you were saying, that maybe they were too much. *squees loudly* Thank you so much for reviewing!

Name: siriusly_vic (Signed) · Date: 04/17/07 6:55 · For: Lily, James and Juliana
Hey lils,
This is amazing work. Poor lily is all alone. :( Wonderful Wonderful!!!!! :) My fav part is 'Give up, Hazel cannot,
But begins to Fade away' for some reason. I'll see ya later.
~~~SIRIUSLY_VIC~~~ (like siriusly)

Author's Response: Hi MI ! Yay, thank you so very mucheth! You stayed home from school today just to review my poem?? AWESOME!!! Just kidding. Anyways, thank you! Glad you liked! -Laila-

You must login (register) to review.