That was so sweet of Viktor! Great fic - it was romantic with it's funny moments, especially when you said how VIktor dreams of Hermione trying to teach him to say her name :) Nice writing!
This was very sweet! I don't think there are enough Hermione/Viktor stories out there, and most of the ones that are don't explore Viktor's romantic side. I like that this story is implied romance too - even though we don't see the two interact physically, the affection between them is still obvious.
You wrote Viktor's letter amazingly well. The difficulty with English was just enough to imply he had tried to learn the language.
I really hope you'll consider writing a sequel where the two meet and the rose blooms (but I'm guessing you'll wait until the final book, just in case one of them is killed).
this is a very sweet story.
First, splendid writing. The beginning definitely captures the attention of the reader regardless of the plot at that point. It's rather descriptive and eloquent, yet gruesome at the same time. Whoa.
I think you captured Hermione's anger, resentment, sadness really well in the third paragraph:
Hermione is displaced; her life revolves around not a job, not a house, not a career, but on the edge of survival. A few moments of blood-pumping, heart-racing life when she’s on the battlefield and she screams her battle cry, a valkerie in tattered robes and tear-stained shirts, but when the dust settles and the last drops of life coagulate on the ground, life recedes into the murky waters of a tomorrow that currently doesn’t exist.
You write Hermione in a weak state of mind, and vulnerable, but on the flip side, she's also a valkerie, historical strong warrior women. Good analogy.
Then of course, you write the shining light to her darkness in the form of a letter. It was great! I like how you make Viktor hopeful and being the proverbial beacon of light.
And you did a splendid job bringing it all back together to the new year. XD
I don't really like Hermione/Viktor but you did a good job of writing them together while keeping them in character.
This is such a gem of a fiction. Coherent, sweet, and intelligent all in one go—I really like it.
The image that is presented of Hermione is an unusual one, but nevertheless wonderful. It makes sense that her extraordinary motivation and drive would be channeled into the fighting that she has to do, transforming her into an all-out warrior. “A few moments of blood-pumping, heart-racing life when she’s on the battlefield and she screams her battle cry, a valkerie in tattered robes and tear-stained shirts, but when the dust settles and the last drops of life coagulate on the ground, life recedes into the murky waters of a tomorrow that currently doesn’t exist.” What a strong sentence; I particularly like how the uncertainty of the future was alluded to, as it is throughout the fic, because that gives a great continuity of theme.
That uncertainty was explored very well, in a thought-provoking manner that also gave structure. “What good is a promise if you can’t live long enough to fulfill it? This is the question that flees the body of a fallen warrior as its soul departs.” I love those lines, and these too: “This is the fork in the road of hope and despair, and there are no sign-posts to lead the way. There never are. It is simply how life functions. Hermione has no light to read them, anyways.”
The situation that she is put into and the manner in which she is saved, even if only for a little while, are both unique and appropriate. I love how just as she has lost hope and feels as though everyone she knows has abandoned her, Victor’s letter arrives.
The letter…it’s so perfect. The cautious precision of the wording, the sweetness; they combined beautifully. I definitely smiled when I read about what Viktor’s dream. It’s nice to think about them taking comfort and hope from the thought of one another.
Then there’s the rose. I was skeptical when I first read that, but it was handled with practicality and without melodrama, and so I think it’s a great touch. “The rose petals shiver in the wind, and it shakes a thousand promises in her fingers.” That line worked well to illustrate how the rose was giving her hope, something to look forward to, promises, as had been talked about before. The conclusion truly did tie up the story very well and I enjoyed that immensely. A little certainty does a lot for peace of mind, as you have shown.
There are some aspects that I wasn’t completely satisfied with, like this sentence: “There’s no celebrations on a battle field, even if Hermione’s field is beautifully bright as the moon shines down on frozen fields.” The part about the moon seemed a bit pointless, even if it is a pretty description.
“There's something slightly heavier than parchment in it; probably a rock that got caught in it somehow.” The reasoning of the rock is pretty weak—that could be improved.
Lastly, the quick succession of questions (He admires her? She changed him? She can change things?) was almost disconcerting. Perhaps fill in with a few more thoughts, musings, realization so that it isn’t quite so stark and emotionally detached.
Otherwise: lovely, romantic, and meaningful story—I’ve added it to my favorites. Good job.
YES! Finally, someone who agrees Krum and Hermione are meant to be together! Krum + Hermione 4ever!!!
Beautiful. "Short and sweet" seems insulting to this story. You portrayed the war very realistically, and I like your "light at the end of the tunnel" idea with the promise.
A beautiful story. I usually dismiss Hermione/Krum relationships, but what you have written is poignant and powerful. The touches of humour lift the story, just as they liften Hermione's mood.
This was very touching. You got down how Hermione probobly would react to these things that Viktor has written. Good job.