Oh, yes, Ash, this is wonderful. I love the tempo of the words and the symmetry of the first and third sentences as he gradually moves from complete denial through anger to acceptance. It shows his strength, really, in that he's managed to get past the chasm of Sirius' death and into a place where he can use it in a more positive light.
Author's Response: Thanks much, HH! I see you're someone who really knows how to appreciate poetry for what it is. :) I'm glad you liked it and thanks again for your awesome review. :D ~GG
No offense, but I didn't think this was as great as your writing usually is. It seems way too short. I'd suggest dragging it out a bit, and going from really shoppy sentences, like the ones you already have, to somewhat longer and coherent sentences ("I will remember him. ", etc.)
Author's Response: Well the point of the sentence structure is to convey emotion, and when you're angry and in shock, you usually don't think so eloquantly or verbose. Sometimes more is less, you know. ;-) It all depends on the purpose and meaning, dear. Thanks for your input. ~GG
Interesting, I've never seen one set out like this before. I think this is really great, it's simple yet deep. If that makes sense. I can really relate to his thoughts. Ok i sound like an idiot but who cares!! Great job ^_^
Dee Dee xx
Author's Response: Hehe yes it makes perfect sense. Sometimes the more simple the poem the more it's really able to cut right to the meaning. Thanks for the review, o faithful one! ~GG
It's perfect, really! I think that the style is just right for how we know he felt (and some of us still do ;).) Great job, Gigi!!
Author's Response: Thanks, RVC! I know exactly what you mean...I'm still pretty angry that she killed Sirius, and I was definitely in total shock. Thanks again. You're a star! ~Gigi :D