I like reading poetry sometimes, and I'm glad I found yours.

You did a great job potraying Sirius in here. His hopelessness and anger felt very real. Sirius' stay at Azkaban is a great subject for a dark poem, and I don't think this poem would have worked as well if written from the POV of a different character.

The tone was perfect. The despair and hopelessness of it fit Sirius's story perfectly. He had such a horrible life since the Potters' death, and you can see how horrible it was for him. After reading, I feel a bit sad and hopeless myself, which shows how powerful it is.

Under the curse of his own taunts,
He curled up on the floor.
Demons appeared to push him down
Until he fought no more.

Farewell, to strength; forget courage!
It faded and soon died
And his righteous spirit did emit
A shrill, anguished cry.

These two stanzas together was my favorite part of the poem. The image you get here – of Sirius slowly decaying and losing himself in Azkaban – is powerful. The language fits with the mood perfectly; it’s simple and complex at the same time. I got chills after reading this.

The rhythm was great; it flowed very nicely when I read it out loud. The rhyme was good except for once. In the third stanza, the rhyme of "sleepin’" and "weaken’d" doesn't sound right; it was a bit stretched here. For most of it, the ends of the second and fourth lines rhymed nicely, so this stanza felt out of place.

Overall, I enjoyed this poem. I don't usually read a lot about Sirius, and this was a nice change.

~ Teresa