Reviewer: Pissenoffanis
Date: 05/16/08 2:47
Chapter: Chapter 8 - A Chocolate Induced Revelation

Awww what fluff! *wink* That was a very cute scene between James and Lily... pity it took Arithmancy to get them together *chuckle* But nice job on that.

And looks like Kirsty has some hidden feelings for Sirius! Well I guess it could just be Sirius's hotness (snuggling up to a topless him would make any girl blush i spose) but man do her cheeks flame! I can't wait to see them in the morning...

PS: I can't believe Emma still thinks what she thinks! You'd better have her friends give her a smack upside the head and tell her the truth next chapter... Otherwise that's just plain mean! :))

Author's Response: Yay thank you, I love writing fluff! Glad you liked it, it's always a challenge to write those two well! Yeah Arithmancy is the key lol. Yeah, bless Kirst *is so not jealous that she got to spend the night with a half naked Sirius Black* and poor little naive Emma, will she ever figure it out? *lips are tightly sealed* Thank you so much for reading, enjoying and reviewing!

Reviewer: MissHufflepuff
Date: 05/16/08 2:24
Chapter: Chapter 8 - A Chocolate Induced Revelation

Just so you know, it made my night to log on and see that this story had been updated.

I love the whole situation between James and Lily and what James said, "I've waited seven years for you, I think I can wait a little bit longer." totally made my heart sqush!!!! I like that you're building up to them being a couple and not rushing it.

Now I'm curious about what's going to happen with Sam and Emma. Please update soon.

Author's Response: I know, I was squealing in the libaray in school this afternoon when I checked my emails to see that this chapter had been validated after only a week! Aw, glad you liked Lily and James I think it's really important to build up their relaionship, they are the most important couple after all. Hmm, Emma and Sam *remains silent* I should be putting chapter 9 in the queue tonight! Thanks so much for the review!

Reviewer: dracoslamis
Date: 05/14/08 3:45
Chapter: Chapter 7 - Aftermath: Part Two

hehe, i think what sam did is really the best he could have in that situation, silly Emma.

love the story, and YEY james and lilly =D

cant wait for the next update!!


your faithful addicted reader, becci xxxxxxxxxxx

Author's Response: I know bless Sam, shame the plan backfired, Emma deserves a good talking to! lol. Yay, glad you liked it, and aren't Lily and James just the cutest? Chapter Eight in the queue! Woo I have a faithful and addicted reader, thank you! xx

Reviewer: Afifa
Date: 05/12/08 8:32
Chapter: Chapter 7 - Aftermath: Part Two

The mistakes: 

Peter was sat with his legs draped over the arm of his armchair, his hand resting on his growling stomach in an attempt to tame it.

The 'sat' shouldn't be there. 

“Poor James,” stated Sirius sympathetically, catching a glimpse of the solitary figure sitting miserably underneath the beech tree on the edge of the lake.

There should be a comma after 'poor'. 

“Maybe,”

The same comma, fullstop thing. lol. 

Not impressed that his secret had been sussed, Sirius jumped on top of him and the two boys started to have a good old scrap, giggling violently as they did so.

The same giggling thing.  

Right, I'm done. lol. I loved the whole James- Sirius thing. Next, the whole Sam-Emma thing. And the whole James-Lily thing. And I loved the 'Bloody alcohol' dialogue. =D (Can you tell that I'm on a hurry?)

 One more thing: update soon. =D

 



Author's Response: Okay thanks for pointing them out to me, gosh you've really given me a lot to work on, as if producing numerous chapters wasn't enough :p lol. Oh and with the giggling thing, I meant to put it because I wanted it to seem like Sirius and James giggle like little school girls, bless. Hehe, I had a lot of relationship stuff going on in there, eh? Thanks for the review, chapter eight is in the queue!

Reviewer: malhippie
Date: 05/10/08 23:16
Chapter: Chapter 7 - Aftermath: Part Two

WRITE MORE PRETTY PLEASE

Author's Response: Chapter Eight's in the queue! Thanks for reviewing!

Reviewer: Afifa
Date: 05/10/08 21:19
Chapter: Chapter 7 - Aftermath

 LOL. I loved this chapter! =D

“You mean to tell me that you have absolutely no recollection of one of the best nights of my entire life?” Sirius asked, aghast.

“But… we… we didn’t, you know, did we?” babbled Kirsty. Sirius roared with laughter. “What did we say about the laughing?” asked Kirsty meekly.

Bestesht dialogue. =D  



Author's Response: Thank you! Hehe, poor Kirsty lol! Thanks for the review! 90 reviews! *dances*

Reviewer: kritchen
Date: 05/10/08 11:16
Chapter: Chapter 7 - Aftermath: Part Two

:P I think I've said this before, but you're a genius! You covered all of this fantastically well and it wasn't cliched at all (though by now, I know to expect much better from you :D)

I absolutely loved how Sam did that. If only guys were like that in real life! ;)

Author's Response: Aww thank you! That means a lot, it really does! If I only I was a genius when it came to geography (the exam I'm revising for right now)! Yay glad i managed to avoid the cliches! I know bless him, I want a guy like that :(. Thanks for the lovely review!

Reviewer: Afifa
Date: 05/10/08 6:56
Chapter: Chapter 6 - Halloween

Wow! I loved the whole chapter! And I'm assuming that you love the Disney characters a lot? Not that it's bad. ;) I love them, too.

No mistakes, by the way. ;) Nothing that I could point out.

No cliffie for me! Yay! =D 



Author's Response: Aw thanks, who doesn't love Disney characters? lol. Yay no mistakes *dances* U lucky so and so, most readers had to wait ages to see what happened, as Mugglenet went down just after I posted this chapter!

Reviewer: Afifa
Date: 05/09/08 19:17
Chapter: Chapter 5 - The Pickup Line

Awesome! I LOVED the flashbacks. They explained quite a lot. And also why the girls and guys became friends, and all. Very good thinking! *thumbs up*

Even more annoying than that was the fact that Kirsty had proven herself to be a natural at acting intuitively with concerns to magic. MacIntosh had been so impressed with her that she had been the only one exempt from that day’s homework.

I like the fact that you've made Kristy the best one out of the group. In DADA I mean. Otherwise it's James or Sirius. 

The comma and full stop thing was seen again over here:

"Don’t worry, it’s taken care of,”

The whole 'apple' part was hilarious. It's astonishing how you were able to create a fully fledged scene just out of a bowl of apples. Great work! =D 



Author's Response: Yeah flashbacks are fun to write. I actually have a lot of the back story worked out, but I'm not sure how much will ever make its way into the story, we shall see. Yeah, I suppose Kirsty needs to be good at something bless her! Now you come to mention it, it is quite surprising how I managed to write a whole scene around apples, oh well, imagination works in mysterious ways! Oh and can I just say a huge thanks for your critique, it's helping a lot, I'll be sure to fix all the errors once chapter eight is out of the queue. But I think I stop doing the comma and full stop error in later chapters, or at least I hope I do. rnrnThanks for all these reviews, you keep making me smile!

Reviewer: Afifa
Date: 05/09/08 18:25
Chapter: Chapter 4 - So it Begins: Part Two

I loved this chapter, too! =D

Again Hayley’s enquiries were shunned as Sirius protested, “But, Prongs, you love me. At least that’s what you said that night up on top of the Astronomy Tower…”

Lily laid her fork down and raised her eyebrows.

“Yeah, that was a great night,” agreed James nostalgically.

“I am oh so worried about you two,” declared Emma as she approached the little knot of Gryffindors.

“How do you think we feel?” asked Peter, following in her wake, “we have to share a dorm with them.”

I laughed so hard at this, I had to leave the room, cause everyone's sleeping! lol.

The typos:

Lily groaned. “Those four really are the limit,”

 
“In your dreams, Prongs,”

“Damn you, White,”

The same comma and full stop thing.

"I still can’t believe that James didn’t try to hex the slimy gets into next Sunday,” stated Kirsty.

I assume that you mean 'gits' and not 'gets'.

“Don’t!” yelled Snape, glaring furiously at Wilkes.

“What’s the matter, Sev? You never seemed to have a problem with calling me that,” stated Lily.

That was really sweet of Sev. I feel very sorry for the poor guy!

Anyways, I loved the  'food fight', the duel, everything. Sirius going down the memory lane was pretty sweet, too. =)



Author's Response: Hehe, Padfoot and Prongs are in luuuuurve, hehe glad you liked it! Yeah I suppose I feel the tiniest bit sorry for Snape. Thanks for the lovely review once again!

Reviewer: Afifa
Date: 05/09/08 17:44
Chapter: Chapter 4 - So it Begins

And another thing, which I completely forgot to mention. I looked up on Google, and found out that 'Typicus' means 'Symbolic'. He's named that 'cause he's an Ancient Runes teacher, right? =D

Author's Response: Haha, well done! A bar of Honeydukes' finest is coming your way!

Reviewer: Afifa
Date: 05/09/08 17:30
Chapter: Chapter 4 - So it Begins

 Another great chapter! =D

“Oh, if I was a girl I’d definitely have a crush on MacIntosh,” he replied completely deadpan.

LOL. =D I love your Remus! 

After a while, Kirsty, who knew full well that Sirius didn’t generally like to eat much, if anything, at breakfast, had taken it upon herself to bug him by forcing the plate of sausages in front of his face repeatedly.

Another refreshing change. Your Sirius doesn't like to have breakfast. In other fics, he's practically piling up his plate with everything within his arm's reach. And he eats disgustingly, and that annoys me a lot!  

“Very well, Miss Evans, I shall give you some examples. Statues and suits of armour could be manipulated into putting themselves in the line of fire in order to protect you and others from dangerous oncoming spells, and you could even use them in the offensive,”

The same full stop replacing comma thing. Plus, I see that you've put the Final Battle thing here. ;) 

“Sorry, Sir,” Sirius countered politely.

Another nice thing. He's polite to the teachers. =)

Having written down the more important information off the board, Sirius began to become increasingly bored.

And another, Sirius <i>does</i> copy notes, even though he means to copy the others later. He does not have this thing that I'm the best and I don't need to study at all.

“Liar,”

“No,”

“Suit yourself,”

“Hmm,”

Same comma and full stop thing.  

Remus had to admit though that what counted in his mind as an ‘unkempt slob’ probably counted in the minds of the fan girls as ‘ruggedly handsome sex God’.

I LOVE this line, and Sirius, too! =D



Author's Response: Hehe, yeah I love writing Remus, I always imagined him as being very sarcastic and deadpan. Aww, thanks, I'm glad you like Sirius and that i've managed to avoid the cliches, I just could never imagine him and the other Marauders being rude, disgusting and lazy. Thanks for pointing out the errors again, I'll be sure to fix them!

Reviewer: Afifa
Date: 05/09/08 15:39
Chapter: Chapter 3 - Professor MacIntosh

LOL. That was like so funny! =D

A few nitpicks though. =) 

 As the two girls approached him, James could hear Sirius also giggling away at the side of him.

You shouldn't have used the word 'giggling' with guys, especially the Marauders, and especially Sirius. 'Giggling' is more of a girl-y girl word. 

“Oh, you know you wouldn’t love us as much if we didn’t act as we do,”

The sentence should end with a full stop, and not a comma.

“Aw, come on,” replied Sirius charmingly, flicking his head back to get his fringe out of his eyes as he leaned in closer to Kirsty and gave her his most winning smile, “you know you love me,”

Same over here.

Dumbledore was stood waiting patiently for the excited conversation to die down.  

Either you should cancel 'was', or cancel 'stood'.

Okay, I'm done. =p 

“I can’t find my mirror!” Emma suddenly yelled in distress, “I must have left it in my trunk!”

“Oh no!” exclaimed Remus sarcastically.

LOL. 

“Personally,” contradicted Sirius with a big mischievous grin, “I prefer masturba-“ However, Lily was too fast for him, and she cast Silencio before he was able to finish his sentence.

LMAO. This part cracked me up. =D

I loved this lenghty chapter. I tend to write long stuff, too. Once I wrote a 10,000 word chapter, but then I cancelled the whole thing out. =O

Oh, and I do love Scottish accents.



Author's Response: *winces* I'll be sure to change them! Thanks! I'm glad you liked it! It's good that you like lengthy chapters because there's plenty more where that came from! And woot for Scottish accents!

Reviewer: Pissenoffanis
Date: 05/09/08 1:04
Chapter: Chapter 7 - Aftermath: Part Two

Whew that was one busy chapter!!! Some nice character relationship building... James riling Sirius up like that was ingenious! Hilarious too! I wonder since James will now have a happy love life, try to err... rub that off on SIrius and Kirsty too :) Can't wait to see what happens there.

ROFL at Emma's reaction to Sam's outburst! I mean c'mon girl, he was looking into your eyes the whole time! Definately blonde, that one. Although he was rather harsh to Sian *wince* And slapped twice in one day... ouch.

I do forgive Sam, as well, if Sirius WAS telling the truth, and they DID add 2L of firewhisky to the 3L punch... 'nuff said.

Author's Response: Yep very busy lol! Hehe I love writing little spats like that between Sirius and James, sooo much fun! Oh I'm sure Kirsty and Sirius will have their turn :D! Hehe, I know bless the little blonde Emmsie, but we love her for it! Ohh feeling sorry for Sian? Didn't see that one coming! Thanks for the review, gad you enjoyed it!

Reviewer: MissHufflepuff
Date: 05/08/08 21:25
Chapter: Chapter 7 - Aftermath: Part Two

excellent chapter as always, sent me into giggles for a few minutes, especially after the mostly non verbal conversation between Remus and Sirius when Kristy asked Sirius," I wasn't supposed to understand that, was I?"

I can't wait to read more, please update soon.

Author's Response: Yeah, that bit seems to be quite popular, glad you liked it! Chapter Eight in the queue!

Reviewer: Afifa
Date: 05/08/08 19:17
Chapter: Chapter 2 - Genius Meet Lunacy

It was awesome. Sirius-ly. I especially loved Peter's characterization. The whole fighting part, him being sarcastic, everything. It seems real. Other authors have him tagging around, he doesn't seem significant in their fics. They seem to forget that Peter was a part of the group.

  

"Are you okay?" Sirius asked Kirsty, concern etched into every line of his face.

I'm guessing that Sirius and Kristy will be having a thing soon? =D

"Okay, us girls will get changed first," replied Emma.

The boys looked like they had no intention of moving; they just sat there waiting expectantly for the girls to get changed.

Kirsty and the other three girls stood in front of them with raised eyebrows and crossed arms.

"You're not bothering us," stated Sirius, innocently.

"OUT!" exclaimed the girls in unison.

I know that others have said this, but I'd like to repeat, I LOVED this part. It's hillarious!  



Author's Response: Aw thank you! I try really hard to include Peter as a member of the group, even though some days I have to try really hard (he killed Lily and James!). Hehe glad you like the last bit, it's one of my fave lines too :D. Thanks for the review!

Reviewer: Katie616
Date: 05/08/08 18:25
Chapter: Chapter 7 - Aftermath: Part Two

*is insulted for Sam*
I never thought he was an (insert nasy name here)! I always thought he was a bit low-key, but still a nice guy, in a Sam North kinda way! I mean, he and Emma are perfect for each other, and I knew the Sian thing was totally alcohol-induced.

As for Lily and James. . . *raises eyebrows suggestively* *sniggers* That's really all there is to say. . . er, suggest.

And Sirius and Kirsty. . . heh heh heh. . . things are definitely escalating there, hmmmm? *eyebrows almost disappear into hairline*

Can't wait for the next chapter! This story is simply hilarious! I especially loved the scene with Remus and Sirius, when after they're done Kirsty goes 'I wasn't expected to understand that, was I?' I love how you said she looked: 'flummoxed.' What a wonderful word! *sniggers again*

Please update soon? *puppy dog eyes*
~Katie

Author's Response: Hehe, do I detect a Sam fan? I know bless him, at least he'll know to stay away from the alcohol in future! Hmm Lily and James and Kirsty and Sirius do we need to discuss the proceedings :p? Hehe, yeah Kirsty has no idea how to translate Marauder code, bless! Chapter Eight is in the queue! Thanks for reviewing, and gosh you read through all the chapters quickly :D!

Reviewer: Afifa
Date: 05/08/08 2:17
Chapter: Chapter 1 - The Gathering

Lovely beginning! I love Kristy's characterization. She seems a lot like me. :p

 I noticed one spelling mistake though:

 In addition, she was also wearing dark blue jeans, black boots and a fair bit of jewelry

It's 'jewellery'. =)

 *goes to read the next chapter*



Author's Response: Aw thank you! Ooh thanks for pointing that out! I think that's from a weird period when my computer was giving me american spellings :s, even though I told it not to! Thanks I'll change it!

Reviewer: Winnyy
Date: 05/07/08 13:41
Chapter: Chapter 4 - So it Begins

Significance?
Umm..Is it Latin for something? Greek? XD

Wow, this is great!=D

Author's Response: Latin actually, but what for? Thanks again!

Reviewer: Winnyy
Date: 05/07/08 13:31
Chapter: Chapter 3 - Professor MacIntosh

EEEEK!

Professor "MacIntosh" Or something like that.. XD

Hehe! XD

This is so great!:)

Author's Response: Does he sound hunky or what? lol, thank you for all these reviews!

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