Reviewer: StarSilvermoon
Date: 01/07/08 8:18
Chapter: Lily, Did You Know?

That was really cool! I know Mary Did You Know, so I just sung the lyrics to the melody. Great job.

Author's Response: Thanks, StarSilvermoon. I'm glad you enjoyed it!

~Megan

Reviewer: lupinluver
Date: 04/09/07 14:38
Chapter: Lily, Did You Know?

I LLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOVVVVVVVVEEEEEEDDDDDDDDD it ! now this song is stuck in my head! LOL ! GOOD JOB! =D

Author's Response: Thanks, lupinluver. I'm glad you liked the song.

~Megan

Reviewer: Jenn22291
Date: 02/04/07 16:02
Chapter: Lily, Did You Know?

I've been meaning to read this ever since I saw your video for it, so I had to review it for the crew! I loved the connection you made from the real song to Lily. I think it fits quite nicely. They lyrics you came up with were excellent and very powerful, especially toward the end. Nice job! :)

Author's Response: Thanks so much, Jenn! I'm thrilled that you liked it! And you saw the video, too? Squee!

~Megan

Reviewer: wendelin the wierd
Date: 01/22/07 0:23
Chapter: Lily, Did You Know?

Megan! *Tackles fellow lion*

Alright, let us get down to business. Overall, I found this poem rather touching and yet I had this sense of awe after reading it. You reflect a great deal on co-incidence and pre-written destiny without actually mentioning it anywhere and this really gave the poem a special feel. Indeed, every little action of ours does have a great impact on everyone else whether we realize it or not.

I also like how you compared the arrival of Harry Potter to the arrival of Jesus Christ. You stuck to the mood of the original song and yet made this poem your own. But in the original songs the lyrics had a definite rhythm whereas this poem doesn’t and I do think it would be nice if you could get this to rhyme as well.

This poem has a lot of meaning but I wish you would focus on imagery as well. Imagery is what differentiates a good poem from a great poem and in your parody I noticed that some paragraphs had beautiful imagery whereas some paragraphs didn’t. However, it is easy to fix so that shouldn’t be a problem.

I really liked these paragraphs, they were well-written and had beautiful imagery-

Lily, did you know
That your baby boy
Would some day conquer evil?


Lily, did you know
That your baby boy
Survives because of your love?


First Paragraph

Truly an Excellent verse. I love how this shows the constant battle between good and evil and how you made it cannon to fit HP. Once again, this paragraph shows pre-written destiny. The description here is well done and since it is really describing the future and what one boy will grow up to be, the word choice is extremely good. Nice usage of the word ‘conquer’; makes this verse seem more powerful.

Second Paragraph
Mother’s love again, isn’t it? It is a very powerful bond and these lines carry a wonderful message.

Did you know
That your baby boy
Will soar through the skies?


I love the metaphor of flying you have used here. It’s very beautiful and very symbolic. Also, the imagery here is wonderful; you can almost picture a bird breaking free of its chains and soaring high in the sky.

The sleeping child you're holding
Is the world's last hope.


These are by far the best lines in terms of imagery and meaning. See how the words ‘sleeping child’ give the reader the impression of an innocent Harry who doesn’t yet know of all the terrible dangers that await him? I would like you to carry on this imagery in the rest of your poem as well.

Now, I am going to be extremely nitpicky and give you some constructive criticism, just to show you what can be improved upon and how.

Let us take this paragraph first-

Did you know
That your baby boy
Is called the "Chosen One"?


Again beautiful imagery in this one but what bothers me is how it is written in a different tense from the rest of the paragraphs. Here by using the word ‘is’ in the beginning of the third line it seems as if he is already called the ‘chosen one’ . And then from the next paragraph onwards it is ‘will be’. So, does this mean that he is already the chosen one because of the prophecy? I think that is what you mean but the use of ‘is’ makes the poem a bit confusing.

With Ron, Ginny,
And Hermione too,
Your son cannot fail.


I like how this reflects the strong bonds of friendship between them. Since you are asking the question ‘Lily, did you know…’ repeatedly this paragraph should end with a question mark as well. Also, this did not seem as nice as the rest of the paragraphs, using stronger imagery here would help along with different words. Quite simply, put the same paragraph in different words. How about–

With friends like these,
The strongest shields,
Your son cannot fail?


Finally, I like how you ended the poem with ‘Lily, did you know?’ The repetition in this whole poem has been wonderful and it is a really nice parody. I know I might have criticised this poem a lot but hopefully it will help you improve it. Don’t get me wrong, I really do like this poem and appreciate the fact that you went out of your comfort-zone to write it.

Good work!

Reviewer: LexiGirl
Date: 01/04/07 12:40
Chapter: Lily, Did You Know?

Cute! This is one of my favourite christmas songs and I never imagined how it could tie in with Harry Potter. Very cute idea! 10/10

Author's Response: Thanks, LexiGirl. I'm glad you liked it.

~Megan

Reviewer: Sunflower at Dusk
Date: 12/30/06 23:18
Chapter: Lily, Did You Know?

I love that song. Your lyrics fit nicely.

Author's Response: Thanks, Sunflower! I love the song, too, and the whole idea for doing this challenge just came out of nowhere. I'm glad you liked the parody, and thanks again for the review. ~Megan

Reviewer: Euphrates
Date: 12/29/06 11:00
Chapter: Lily, Did You Know?

This a sweet fic. (Sweet not as in "awesome", but as in "sweet".) I never really thought about it - that Lily didn't know Harry would have to save the world, that a prophecy was made between him and the Dark Lord. She didn't know what he would have to go through - and she never would. Now I'm making myself sad...

Anyway, a very touching fic that seems very appropriate to the situation Harry was in, and the situation Lily was in.

This child that you believe in,
Soon everyone will too.
I like this line. Lily always loved her son, and I like the fact that the rest of the wizarding world will have to believe in Harry someday, too.

The sleeping child you're holding
Is the world's last hope.
I don't really know why I like this line - I think I like it because it is so true. Harry is the world's last hope. Simple as that. if he fails, everyone good fails, and Voldemort will destroy everything...

All I have to say about that is that I hope it never happens. That would be bad. (Understatment of the century!)

~Euphrates

Author's Response: Wow, Euphrates! Firstly, thanks for the long review! (Those are always my favourites!) I'm glad that you liked the fic, especially considering the idea came almost literally out of nowhere. Also, I'm glad you liked those particular lines, as they are some of my personal favourites out of everything that I wrote. Again, though, thanks for reading, as well as taking the time to leave such a good review. ~Megan

Reviewer: ginnyp_harryp
Date: 12/29/06 10:50
Chapter: Lily, Did You Know?

very cute :]

Author's Response: Thank you, ginnyp_harryp! I'm glad you liked it, and thanks for the review! ~Megan

You must login (register) to review.
Information
Find out everything you need to know about the site right here.


We have stories and authors in this archive.

:

RSS
Choose Theme:
SOCIAL MEDIA
     
MOST RECENT
The Skeletons' Tale by Oregonian 1st-2nd Years
"A rose by any other name would smell as sweet," wrote Shakespeare. This story...
Autumn At The Castle by Oregonian 1st-2nd Years
The 'treat' of autumn's glorious beauty is inevitably follow by the 'trick'...
The Youngest Death Eaters: Year III by DestinyMoonStar 6th-7th Years
Year 3 A year of hard choices and tough talks: Destiny learns about...
FEATURED
Five Christmases by hestiajones 1st-2nd Years
It took four Christmases for Andromeda Black and Ted Tonks to get together...
Coming Alive by The owl 6th-7th Years
Leanne Gamp hadn't wanted to be at that party, even though it was Christmas...
Graves by Oregonian 1st-2nd Years
In December of 1997, Harry visits his parents' graves in Godric's Hollow and...
CATEGORIES