Hi Suzie! Okay, firstly, this is an extremely belated thank you for the totally amazing banner you made for my WIP story. Itís still my favourite Ö and secondly, I donít really do poetry, but I will try my best. *smiles* Iím exceedingly impressed with the beauty of this.
Where to start? Iím trying to remember all the poetry terms from high school Ö Letís see. Imagery, metaphor, and simile Ė I loved the way you used tulips here. In the first section, the tulips seem like the family coming to mourn, remembering the fallen, but then going back to their daily life. And they come every year.
Iím not an expert on poetic grammar, but in the second stanza, third line, I would use a comma instead of a semi-colon, and the same thing in the third stanza, second line.
Oh, Suzie, this second section makes my heart ache. Itís just so achingly beautiful. Iím trying to pick out a favourite line from that section, but I just want to quote the whole thing! The part that made me want to cry was in retrospect to the sweet spring that he loved. *tear* And the petals that frame his life Ö that again makes me think of the family, upholding the memories of the fallen, celebrating his life instead of dwelling on his death. They donít want to let go of him, but they canít help it Ė thatís the way life is. They want to forget him, because it hurts to think of him, but when they do forget, it hurts more to know that they were able to be happy without him. Such beautiful, powerful metaphors. And then you start and end with the soft dewdrops! Lovely.
The third stanza is also so powerful. Especially after reading DH and feeling the anguish of the Order losing the battle, thinking that Harry had died Ö I donít know how they could have born it if he hadnít come back. Total devastation, even if his death had saved them all. This section especially has great rhythm and rhyme, and again, the imagery and personification of the tulips is perfect. Iím amazed at your ability to tell the story without explicitly stating what is happening. Just Ö guh. Itís simply astounding.
*contented sigh* The final section ties everything together, doesnít it? It has echoes of each preceding section, with mentions of Time, fresh life, colour, grey, dewdrops, and dust. The family (which Iím pretty sure is the Weasleys at this point) has mourned, but they know that Harry wouldnít want them to dwell on his death, so they stand tall and move on with their lives, living them in ways that would never have been possible if he hadnít died. And every year, theyíll remember and mourn for him, but life will still go on. What a perfect message.
Suzie, dear, I heart this poem. Itís just as beautiful and intricate as your banners, if not more so. I love that you can paint beautiful pictures with words just as well as you can with colour and images. Iím definitely adding this to my favourites. Thank you so much for this utter gem. Itís seriously made my day. *loves*
Author's Response: Abigail! Well Ö this is an extremely belated response to your review Ö so weíre even. *giggle*
I chose the theme of ďTulipsĒ pretty randomly to be honest Ė I was going through my Tulips phase where everything I wrote, every graphic I made, had to have some sort of tulip slipped in. Looking back, Iím quite glad that I used it for this poem Ė I think it sort of fits.
Thanks for the tip about semi colons, Iíll go check it out! Iím glad you liked those lines. With the petals framing the Ďlife of colourí I was sort of thinking of a grave, with photos of Harry and the family/friends placed around the flowers, with perhaps flowers growing over them in time, like the frame of a picture.
Iím glad that you liked the third stanza. The style and structure of the poem is directly paralleled to ďAt a Potato DiggingĒ by Seamus Heaney, which talks about the Irish people during the 19th century famine. I loved the way that the third part of that poem was more intense, faster paced and powerful than the rest, so I wanted to bring this out here as well.
And yes, the family is the Weasleys. I think that if Harry had died, they would definitely be the family that visited him so regularly as, well, they more are less are family anyway.
Iím so glad you like this poem hon, thanks a lot for reviewing!! ~Suzie
Aw, this was so sweet, sad and beautiful. I love how the tulips' struggle to live, going through cold and hibernating and all, shows that there is hope after death. Yes, I noticed that that one part was specifically about Harry, that was particularly well written.
You use a nice variation of pretty words, and the rhyming and punctuation feel very natural. I haven't read the poem which structure you used, but I think it worked very well with the story you're telling!
Very good job on this, I'm truly impressed by your knack for writing poetry. Keep it up! =)
Author's Response: Oooh thank you for the review Jen! (Sorry it's taken me so long to respond...)
Yes - hope after death is one of the central themes of this poem. I wanted the image in the first part to be of the family coming to Harry's grave, leaving flowers and just being peaceful and quiet. The rhyming part was obviously, the battle and how Harry died, then the last part about remembrance and hope. I'm glad you got some of that! *yay*
I really suggest you read "At a Potato Digging"! You probably won't like it at first, I remember hating it, but I had to study it inside out for English last year and ended up doing my exam on it...so I'm rather fond of it now. Teehee.
Anyway, thanks again! ~Suzie
This was sort of recommended to me and I'm so glad I read it. It was absolutely beautiful. Each word sort of played off each other. Tulips are my favorite flowers. To me and I hope I'm understanding this correctly, it was about the cycle of life, starting over and hope; yes? Even if I'm wrong I still think it was astounding.
In case you can't tell, I love it!
Author's Response: Thanks for reading and reviewing! *yay, hands over tiramisu* Tulips are my favourite flowers too! At the time of writing this poem, I was kind of obsessed with them and apart from me liking them, there wasnít any real reason for me choosing to have them as a theme. Looking back though, Iím glad I did because Tulips are so colourful, which is good when talking about hope after a death. I didnít want some drab, depressing flowerÖ
Youíre more or less right! *yay* In a way, this poem is sort of AU because I was thinking of ďwhat ifĒ Harry died in the war Ė how would Ginny and people move on? I guess the poem could apply to anyone, but if you look carefully, some parts are written with Harry in mind. :) The ending though, youíre absolutely right, is about hope, and how eventually, they will move on and start over. Death isnít just about sadness!
Anyway, Iím really glad you liked it. :) Thanks so much for the lovely review! ~Suzie
Love this!! So sad but a lovely poem...
Author's Response: Um...thanks again :p ~Suzie
Author's Response: Edit: LOU?! *squee* *huggles* *yay* ~Suzie xx
Love this!! So sad but a lovely poem...
Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad you liked it. :)
Omygosh...*clutches at heart*
I'm rushing out of the house right now, but I jjst read this and had to write something. I love it, and will review it properly later.
Author's Response: *looks forwards to it* :p Thanks for reviewing! I waswondering when someone would...lol ~Suzie