I'm back. So cool. :)
I ♥♥♥♥♥♥ this peom. It's just real clean and simple, the way I think poems should be. Plus, I like the way Narcissa is portrayed. Another side to her.
&& your an awesome writer!
&& I nominated your story for the QSQ! BRAVO!! AND CONGRATS (you know why. 6 more to go!)
Author's Response: Uh...you didn't nominate this one. You did 'Heal Over'. But STOP REVIEWING!!! *giggles*
Sister is on a review spree for you this evening. I think you know why. :)
I like your poem! I think the format is WAY repeating, but also very nice.
'He's the richest of all!'
My mother says,
So I must marry him
He's best for me.
Aw, poor Narcissa! Her mum is telling her all of these things to make Lucius look great, and she can't make up her mind. You can tell by the last two lines.
This was very good and cute though. Great job!
(I'm GinnyPotter by the way!)
~ Michelle /
Author's Response: No, are you? Thanks, sis!
Wow, this was amazing. I can't get over how great that poem was. I think you did a good job knowing that repeating those lines over and over again would be good for the poem. I still can't get over my shock about the wife being Narcissa. You making the mom say all those things about Lucius was great. You make the reader feel like Narcissa knows her mom isn't telling her she HAS to marry him, but she would be completely and totally upset if she didn't. I am immediately going to read your other works, because I think you are just so good. Keep up the good work on whatever you decide to do next.
Author's Response: Thanks so much! Glad you like it. :)
You have nice meter here, and the format is clean and simple.
I like the way you sort of give Narsisa the appearance of having her own option on this- but you don't come right out and say it, you just say “My mother says,” and “so i must.” giving us the impression of her thoughts, but leavening us unsure what they are. Good Job.
Author's Response: Thanks so much! It was my second attempt at poetry (the first is with my beta), and I'm glad I did it right! I love fleshy reviews like this...