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Reviews For Pensieve

Name: hermione-freak (Signed) · Date: 03/24/08 22:35 · For: Lestrange Manor
Nice, I hope you finish it. This beginning could lead to some very interesting situations.


Name: rbcarr (Signed) · Date: 12/05/06 22:15 · For: Lestrange Manor
"The air was disgustingly thick..."

--Hmmm. Not my first choice for an adjective, 'disgusting', maybe you could consider a change. It's descriptive, but somehow it doesn't feel right.

"It was the exact opposite of silence. The scene in front of him could be described in one word; chaotic. His mind was only on one thing; getting Draco Malfoy back to the Dark Lord. "

--Oops. Those semi-colons are not needed. What you do need is a good old regular colon. But i would not suggest using two sentences with that pause in a row.


"Snape was very aware of Draco yelling at him."

--This doesn't seem right. I would add 'suddenly' to the sentence. That would make it more in place. 'Snape was suddenly very aware...'

Otherwise, I love it! It's nice to see someone's idea on what happened after Dumbledore was murdered. Good writing style, lovely vocabulary - and no typos! (from what I saw, at least!)

I can't wait to see more chapters.
Good luck!




Author's Response: Thank you very much. :) I'm glad you liked it, and thanks for the luck.


Name: AKA294 (Signed) · Date: 12/05/06 16:54 · For: Lestrange Manor
This story is intense! I agree with anvil sized hint! Your story is unique in the fact that it is actually exciting in the first chapter! Great job, and keep up the good work! I hope I see an update soon! This is going on my favorites list!


Author's Response: YAY! Thanks. :) I'm glad I'm getting such positive reviews on the first chapter.


Name: HalfBloodPrincess7 (Signed) · Date: 12/05/06 16:45 · For: Lestrange Manor
very nice very nice
I think that all of the characters are GREATLY in character... grr Voldemort. I wonder what Draco will say. hmmm

Author's Response: Aww, thanks. :) I'm happy you like it and I'm going to keep you in wonder... until the next chapter, of course.


Name: anvil sized hint (Signed) · Date: 12/05/06 16:10 · For: Lestrange Manor
Wow... talk about realistic. Very impressed! Usually first chapters are boring, but it seems so intense. Can't wait for the next chapter!! *adds this story to FAVORITES*
=]

Author's Response: First review! Thanks! I'm glad you liked it and I'm happy that this story is on your favorites list.


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