Very powerful and very Hermione. I think a lot of people across the world should read and take notice of this, it has a bigger message than to share.
Author's Response: Thank You!
A very inspiring speech! I liked seeing Hermione's feelings throughout, and her speech was brilliant! IC, and just a great speech in and of itself! This was a really good one-shot, expressing the hope that is left, even after they've lost so much! I really enjoyed reading it!
Author's Response: Thanks so much. *hugs for the great review*
I'm going to start off by saying that this is a wonderful story. Hermione's characterisation was perfectly on-the-dot. I could imagine her being hesitant to forget about the war, and directly disobeying Professor McGonnagall because of what she believed in. It is perfect that she understands that the past dictates the future, and that you should take the past into account when making future decisions.
I also like how she addresses the fact that her graduating class has been raised to fight in a war that had no clear end in sight. This is very true, and in your writing, you seem to capture this in the behavior of the characters.
I would like to have seen more about the behavior of the students. This would have added so much to the story. You would think that this speech would have different kind of effects on different people.
This fanfiction was extremely well-written, and I love it to death! :)
Author's Response: Thanks for the compliments. I'm glad you liked the story.
Showing the students reaction is a really good idea. I have gotten a lot of comments about adding things to this fic. Perhaps, one day, it will see another chapter.
Thanks for the lovely review.
SPEW buddy! *tackle hugs* I initially intended to read something Black-sister centric by you, but my fondness for Hermione called me to this story, and let me say, I’m very glad that I read it! It’s these kinds of stories that I really appreciate, and don’t forget about a second after I submit the review. First of all, allow me to throw a tomato at you for killing Neville. *throws tomato*
Okay, on to more important matters. The themes that you carried out through Hermione’s character really should be acknowledged more than they are, and I love seeing themes addressed in this upfront manner. I think that a speech is a great way to express the issues of raising children into a world of love rather than hate, and being able to move away from a war, to start a new life.
I also think that Hermione was the perfect character to express this through. She’s a conscientious student, so I think that if she had been approached by Professor McGonagall to make this speech, she would have gone through with it. I also think that Hermione’s someone that a lot of students would take seriously while listening to this speech. Now, onto the next thing that really stood out to me.
I love what you’ve done with Hermione’s characterization in this one shot. At first it struck me as slightly odd that Hermione wouldn’t have her speech planned and written down, but that just goes to show how many changes a person can undergo in a war. It’s probable that even the organised!Hermione that we know and love can go through severe changes. I like her line that she said to Tonks, about how she was going to give the speech from her heart. That really sounded like Hermione to me.
My biggest pet peeve with stories that go against canon is that things like graduation ceremonies and such usually aren’t justified. Therefore, I simply loved this line: Hermione had the distinct feeling that this ceremony was more about the Ministry than Minerva McGonagall. The way you wrote it into this story, I find the thought that the Ministry would have this ceremony to be a very plausible one, and could actually see this happening in canon. Another thing that I loved was McGonagall’s letter to Hermione. That seemed very professional, but also slightly friendly towards Hermione, and, well, it just struck me as very McGonagallish. Good work. :)
One nitpick: Hermione stared at the letter she had received three weeks earlier, with the results of her Newts. “NEWTs” should be capitalised.
The only other concrit that I can offer is that I think it would have worked nicely to pause during Hermione’s speech a few times, with a “she said”, or describing her facial expressions, or her position or something. The speech just seemed a bit fast paced, but on the other hand, this was a pretty fast paced one shot, so it works fine as is. That’s just something I would maybe consider.
The last line had a really inspiring effect on me. I love that the other students appreciated Hermione’s words, rather than just brushing them off. Her words had a powerful effect on me. It’s a great thought that someone can make a stand about something so important like Hermione did, and people will actually listen and try to change.
Overall, this was just a very beautiful and well written one shot, Elle! I look forward to reading and reviewing more of your work in the future – perhaps something more Bellatrixy next time. ;)
Author's Response: *wipes tomato juice from face*
Thanks so much for the wonderful review my darling SPEW buddy. I'm glad you enjoyed my little jaunt into Hermioneville. As you know, she's not a character that I write a lot, but I do have a certain fondness for her. And I also felt that she would be the perfect person to make a stand. She's always the one to make a stand.
I was a little leery of including a gradutation after I found out that it isn't the norm in Britan, however, it worked best with the story, so I went with it. Blaming it on the Ministry was really just a spur of the moment thing.
Anyway, thank you again for the lovely review. You've been a great SPEW buddy. *huggles*
Hermione for Minister!
Incredible speech. I loved every part of it. And the rest of the story, too. I particularly loved "She had always been so attentive, but so much had changed". I say, that's an indication of growing-up.
Thank you for your wonderful story. In Spanish there's an expression: "Lo bueno, si corto, dos veces bueno", which translates more or less literally to: "Good things, if kept short, twice better". And that's my view of this story.
Author's Response: Thanks so much. I'm glad you enjoyed the story, and thank you for leaving a review.
Aww…this fic left a smile on my face! It’s a really nice concept, having Hermione give this speech as a final sort of ‘closure’ to the war. And this must be the first time in ages I’ve read something by you that doesn’t involve the Blacks/Lestranges etc… :p
Hermione’s character is great in this. I like the way that the rationally scorns the whole idea of not mentioning the war, doesn’t even make a proper plan for her speech, and yet still as usual ends up with something great. The speech itself was fantastically written – as if it’s spoken ‘from the heart’ (to be cheesy).
There was a war. We can’t pretend there wasn’t. We lived through it. We lost because of it. I know that there is not one person here today who hasn’t suffered because of this war. We have all lost.
Wow. That is such a meaningful paragraph. The short sentences are honest and abrupt and say a lot about the pain that they must all have experienced because of the war.
Our loved ones are not dead because the other side was evil. Our loves ones are not dead because some cruel person took them away. Our loved ones are gone because of hate.
I really like this idea. In this part, it’s as if Hermione is taking away that stigma of “good versus evil” or “two sides of the war”. She’s making clear that what’s causing the pain is hatred, which unfortunately is present on both sides and ruins both sides.
My only bit of criticism here is that the ending is a bit abrupt to me. Maybe I’m just a fan of ‘film-like’ endings with some big closing statement … but I felt that the ending of this, given the theme, could have used a bit more finality – more of a closing statement, a summary etc. :)
Another part of this fic that I really liked was where Hermione is describing the seating, as if even those arrangements are wrong. She doesn’t dwell much on Harry or Neville, or anyone because this isn’t about them/what they did, this is about everyone. I like that. I like the way that in the description you’ve put a bit of the character into it, like with describing what Neville would have done had he been there.
There was no one there to remember Harry or Neville. Some families had been completely wiped out by the war.
Aww. :( That’s really sad to put it in that way. Though I guess that though they have no family to remember them, their friends serve as well as family as anything. [/bad grammar]
This is a really well written and moving fic Elle. Well done! :)
Author's Response: Hehe. Most of my stories center on the Blacks. This one does mention them. I have a few about Petunia that have nothing to do with any of the Blacks! :o
*smiles* Hermione's speech was spoken from the heart. Remember, as you said, she didn't write it. She just got up there and said what she was feeling.
"I really like this idea. In this part, it’s as if Hermione is taking away that stigma of “good versus evil” or “two sides of the war”. She’s making clear that what’s causing the pain is hatred, which unfortunately is present on both sides and ruins both sides."
Ah, but this is my view. This whole mess started with hate and it won't end because both sides continue to hate. They teach their children to hate and the cycle continues.
About the ending, this is the second comment I have had about that. Originally, I planned on writing another scene to this story. I was going to write about a banquet thing after graduation, where Hermione would have a conversation with Narcissa. They would develop a somewhat better understanding of each other and go on more willing to let the hatred rest. However, I thought that was overdoing it. I'm beginning to think that I should have included something along those lines.
Anyway, thanks so much for all the compliments. And thank you for another wonderful review from the wonderful Suzie. *huggles*
Wow... Sly, this story is absolutely amazing. There are so many things you did wonderfully that I scarcely know where to begin, but I suppose I'll try as best I can.
First of all, your characterization of Hermione was perfect; she somehow managed to stay true to her canon characterization, but it was clear how she has matured throughout the course of the war. Her emotions and her distress were very realistic, and the speech was absolutely beautiful.
"I refuse to stand up here today and pretend that the war didn’t happen. I am not going to pretend that there aren’t students here who have lost their parents and parents here who have lost their children." -This is such a wondeful and truthful statement--just beautiful!
"Our loved ones are gone because of hate.
" This sentence--and the entire paragraph preceding it--was just beautiful. It was eloquently and wonderfully written, and it is also amazing how true it is even in our real-life society. Beautiful.
My only bit of concrit is that "N.E.W.T.s" is supposed to be all capitalised, but other than that this was flawless. Wonderful, wonderful job.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for all the compliments. You really pulled some of my favorite lines from the story. I'm glad they left an impact.
Thanks for pointing out N.E.W.T.s. I will try to remember to fix that when it's not 2am. ;)
Anyway, thanks so much for the review and I'm glad you enjoyed the story.
That was beautiful! You captured the spirit of loss and also the one of moving forward quite well. The only thing was, the story was very fast-paced! It was a great story though, regardless of the fact that some of my favorite characters died... I guess that's what happens in a war. Excellent!
Author's Response: Thanks so much. I'm glad you liked it. :D
There's not much I can add. I think that it shows the aftermath of war very well.
I know it's late but I've just joined.
Author's Response: Thanks for the review. I'm glad you think it shows the aftermath well. Thanks so much.
Sheesh, I tear up too easily. I wish that had been slightly longer, the ending would have been a lot better if it hadn't ended so abruptly. These words were powerful and true. I could feel the lump forming in my throat when I wondered how many other people died in that war, in the wars that are actually going on.
"Well, today I say that we end this war. I want this graduating class to go out into the world without hatred. It doesn’t matter which side any of us were on. It doesn’t matter what blood flows through our veins. It matters that we are all human."
They all lost because everyone was harmed. No one can survive hatred. This was a beautiful piece.
Author's Response: Thanks so much for the compliments and I'm glad that you enjoyed it.
I actually did plan to make it longer. I thought about including a scene after the ceremony where Hermione has a coversation with Narcissa, which would have indeed been interesting, but I decided that it wasn't necessary for the story.
Thanks again for the review.
A touching story actually!
Author's Response: Thanks so much. :D
Good for her! I love a good rebel raiser after my own heart. I love the way you explained their losses by showing who wasn't there, as that is the epitome of loss. Good job!
Author's Response: I think Hermione said what needed to be said. I found it kind of sad when I was writing who wasn't there but when the books end we all know they won't all be there. Thanks so much for the review.
wow . . .that was sweet.
Author's Response: Thank you! :D
that was beautiful
Author's Response: Thank you very much. I'm glad you liked it.
Having seen this under "Most recent stories", I decided to give it a shot. I was not too disappointed (allow me to say that I was only disappointed that this one-shot wasn't a bit longer); Hermione's decision to stand up and speak for those who couldn't speak from themselves (and honor their memory) was touching. My favorite line: "We were raised to continue fighting this never-ending war." How true this is--even in real life; racial diversity is one glaring example. When the younger generation finally steps forward to say "Enough!", will there be any peace--which is what Hermione seems to be doing...correct? In any case, KUDOS for a well-written one-shot!
Author's Response: :D Glad you liked it and thank you for the compliments.
"When the younger generation finally steps forward to say "Enough!", will there be any peace--which is what Hermione seems to be doing...correct?"
I actually considered making this longer. I was going to include a scene with Hermione talking with either Draco or Narcissa but I felt that it would only clutter the story because nothing would really be added by it.
Thanks again for the review. :D