Aw, three year old Draco! He was deluded from the very beginning... Not that I'm surprised, with his parents. I love the part where he wonders if 'Trick or Treat' is a real magic spell.
The only flaw I could find is that you used the word 'candy' rather than the word 'sweets', like they say in Britain. Other than that, you did a fantastic job!! =] keep up the good work
Author's Response: Thank you! I keep meaning to delete all of the 'candy's, but I'm toooo lazy.
Tee hee! Little Draco was corrupted from a very young age, I see. I really liked this, it was so much fun!
Draco wondered if it was a real spell.
I don't know why I liked that so much, but I really did! It was just kind of sweet, and three-year-old-ish. I like three-year-old Draco, he's kind of sweet in a brattish way. *Pats*
Anyway, I just thought I'd repay you for the fantabulous reviews you left me! *hugs* They made my day! Especially as I got them all in one go, because I've been deprived of internet this past week ... it's been torture. But still.
It was a great fic, even if it was so short...
Author's Response: Ha, thank you! I'm a huge fan of your stories. Yeah, Draco as a little kid was so cute... too bad he couldn't stay that way!
that was a cool story. I think draco would be a little more bratty and stubborn, But other than that GREAT JOB!!!!!!
Author's Response: Hey, thanks! Yeah, my original idea for the story was to go in a far different direction, one in which he's very bratty and in which the story's all humour. But then I got a plot bunny. I like the idea that all children are intrinsically good and that Draco didn't become what he was until he was older.
Brilliant. You quite implied that Draco was already prejudiced at a young age. That was Brilliant!
Author's Response: Thank you! I'm personally rather proud of this story.
Well done, Draco!! *pinches his widdle cheeks*
Author's Response: Don't encourage him! :)
Hehe. Hope ya don't mind me reviewing this story again!
I like it just as much as I did the last time I read/reviewed it...
But I read your response to my previous review, and thought, what a kawinkidink! I'm fourteen and five-two as well! (and not likely to grow much taller...pout....) ;)
Author's Response: I'm glad you still like it! It would be really bad if you woke up in the middle of the night and went, "Gargh, you know, I've just realized that I totally hate the story 'Draco's Trick Or Treat.'" POWER TO THE SHORT PEOPLE! Like Napolean and Dan Radcliffe!
uhhhh, at the end there, was that Hermione? 'Cause from the way she talked it kinda sounded like she was
Author's Response: You know, a lot of people have pointed that out. Technically, it was my little sister stuck into the story, though! Maybe I should have been clearer in the story... I guess the thing is, Draco calls her a 'Mudblood.' This girl is supposed to be the daughter of two Muggle-borns, and Hermione doesn't yet know that she's magical or anything. It would be cool if it was Hermione, though!
Wow, I really love your little Draco. And how Narcissa seems like such a good mother if you ignore the descrimination... it's perfectly realistic... well, as realistic as you can get.
Author's Response: Why, thank you! I'm glad you liked it, and that my version of Narcissa worked. This is the shortest story I've ever written.
Ohh.. welll... I'm not quite sure how to respond! It was incredibly cute and well-written, but very sad too! It was a great idea of a story, though; shows a different side to Draco, for sure.
Well, great story as usual! Three thumbs up. =))
Author's Response: Thanks very much! (Though you should try to do something about that third arm.)
For all the people who thought this was amusing: shame on you. The lightness of Draco's innocence in this story acts as a paradox to the horrible values Narcissa is teaching him, which makes the tone of this one-shot incredibly twisted and dark.
Author's Response: Thanks, Morgan! The idea was to make it amusing AND dark, though... I mean, who wouldn't be amused by 4-year-old Draco Malfoy? But yes, it's definitely a bit sinister in theme if you think about it.
Aw, that was awful! At the end, I mean. The fic itself was very good. Well written too. I like the way you have Narcissa acting like a good mom with her cute little boy. Nice touch at the end!
Author's Response: Hee, I read the fist sentence, and went, and I quote, :(. But then, I read the third sentence and went :). Thanks, I'm glad you liked it!
What a wonderful child, how quickly he learns! I am sure Narcissa is very proud of him. I thought the "sweet childish voice" that he uses gave a disturbing effect and gave some extra bite to the ending.
Author's Response: Thank you! Yeah, Draco's a bright little kid... it'd be interesting to see how he'd turn out growing up with, say, the Weasleys.
Oh, SAD! How is she a mudblood, though? mudbloods are people who have magic but whose family doesn't. How does a little girl have magic? But anyways, I need to go read every other story you'v ever written, so tah-tah for now!
Author's Response: Oh, she's a "mudblood" because both of her parents are Muggle-born. I guess I wasn't very clear with that in the story, but there was a word limit, since it was for a challenge. I'm glad you enjoyed it!
Oh..that was a very, very well written story! You've wonderfully portrayed Narcissa and young Draco...and was that girl Hermione, by any chance? I like this story because it portrays Drcao as an innocent child, and it is his mother who posions his mind against "mudbloods" and werewolves..and teaches him to be arrogant.....10/10...
Author's Response: Thanks, Bookwormy! I always like receiving your reviews. The little girl's not Hermione... I think she's somebody whose parents are Muggle-born. Basically, she was my little sister. ^_^
Hm... I have it narrowed down to a few people.
Author's Response: Ummm... what do you have narrowed down to a few people? I'm afraid I don't quite understand.
Hey, your story was really cute. Even thought Draco was mean to the little gorl I feel sorry for him, the poor kid never got the chance to make his own decisions about people, he never knew the things he said were wrong.. and all he wanted to do was make his mummy happy :-(
nice work x
Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you got the impression of Draco that I was going for. I really think that if he was taken from his parents at the age of two or so and raised by, say, the Weasleys, he'd have turned out totally differently. But instead, he grew up to be a complete brat. Sad...
So, instead of sorting out christmas presents and revising for my exams, I decided to read more of your stuff, and I'm glad I did, because this is a really really good characterisation analysis and heartwrenching story.
OK, first I just have to say two tiny tiny things I have issues with, if only so I can go on about how they don't really matter later; firstly, candy really isn't used in Britain. It's sweets. Second, Hallowe'en also isn't THAT big over here. It's getting that way, but it isn't quite the same, but that's not something you'd pick up the subtlety of unless you were British. Which you're not. So what I'm trying to say is that those are two small inconsistencies with the world that HP is ACTUALLY set in.
Having said that, this fic is, in essence, a characterisation piece - it offers a unique and beautiful explanation for how it is that people turn out like they do. It's easy to typecast all slytherin purebloods like Malfoy as just not-very-nice-people who think that they are above themselves. What you've done is given a reason WHY and it's a really well constructed one. I mean, no characters are black and white, anyone can see that, but what you've done here is make it possible to see that world from Malfoy's point of view, and see that really what he becomes later in life is just a natural progression.
Oh, and the last paragraph was so good. It sent the hairs on the back of my neck up. Chilling simplicity *thumbs up*
Sorry this was so long, I just felt the need to go on and on. It was so good, and so different from your last fic I read, I am wowed :)
Author's Response: This is an excellent review! *Huggles* You know, people keep telling me about the 'candy' thing, and I just keep forgetting to go back and change it. As for the Halloween thing, I know it's not a huge deal in Britain, but it is in Wizarding Britain! They have a feast and everything, and I get a feeling that it's a major holiday for wizards. Your reviews always make my day! I was thinking about writing a Malfoy Christmas, too, because little Draco is so much fun to write, plus I love Lucius and he wasn't really in this story.
I can't believe I am about to type this, but, little Malfoy WAS so cute!
What is the muggle candy poisoned? Sheesh. I mean, it is candy!
They teach him to say thank you, but he is still allowed to slam the door in a little girl's face. Yes, this is normal...
Author's Response: I know, I just wanted to hug Draco and get him some foster parents! Yep, Malfoy family values are a little, shall we say, skewed.
Aww. I have to say that this is the cutest fanfic starring Draco that I have ever read. He is utterly adorable and so innocent. I like, however, how you managed to avoid making him a total angel by adding the childish ‘vices’ such as greed (what child doesn’t like sweets?). His complete trust in his mother and implicit belief in her words was a little frightening once we saw how she used it, though. Indoctrination at such a young age isn’t something I’d thought of before, but I suppose that with families as ‘pure’ as the Malfoy's it would be ongoing from birth.
The sweet tones of Narcissa as she tells her child such awful things that will instil long-lasting prejudice in him is simply chilling. It is so hard to reconcile her obvious affection towards Draco and the poisonous ideas she is filling his mind with. Yet this emphasises just how wrong these beliefs are. It is heart-breakingly sad to see little Draco accepting it all without a moment’s doubt.
The description in the first paragraph sets the scene wonderfully for a night’s trick-or-treating. However, is it likely that the Malfoy’s would live in an area inhabited by Muggle-borns? I always imagined, considering it’s Malfoy Manor, that they would have a sort of country estate. Also, wouldn’t Muggle-borns be more inclined to live in Muggle areas, as that is where they grew up?
One common Americanism found in your fic is ‘candy’. Candy is not a term usually used in the UK. ‘Sweets’ is what they’re usually referred to as.
In the line ‘ Draco’s eyes were wide, resembling silver sickles’, do you mean Sickles, the wizarding coin? It’s a lovely simile, but don’t forget to capitalise Sickle.
The ending is just too sad. At such a small age he is already acting upon what he has been taught. The contrast between his cruel words and ‘sweet, childish voice’ is very effective. I think, however, that it is in the last line that the true power lies. His mummy would be proud of him. He is so eager to please, so sweet, and he just doesn’t realise the harm he is already causing.
Overall, this is a very touching, very sweet fic. Your characterisation and depiction of a very young Draco is excellent, as is the conveyance of the horror of pure-blooded beliefs. Congratulations on a fantastic job!
~The Order of the Ravenclaw House-Elves~
Author's Response: Wow, this is the best and most detailed review I've ever gotten! Hmm... you know, I didn't even think about the neighborhood, since for some reason, I always imagine my own neighborhood/house/school when I write stories. (Yep. Hogwarts is my high school in my mind... and it's definitely NOT a castle.) Thanks for your thorough critique!
Oh, that poor little girl! It justs goes to show that people end up how they are because of their parents. Very nicely done.
Author's Response: Why, thank you! I'm glad you got the message in the piece! ^_^