Reviewer: Heiress_of_Insanity_
Date: 02/08/07 21:43
Chapter: Questions Asked of the Horizon

Excellent story, very bittersweet and slightly tear-jerking. *tear leaks down cheek* Poor Jon! 10/10~H_o_I_

Author's Response: I'm glad you like it *hands tissue* thanks for the review!

Reviewer: whittyleah
Date: 11/17/06 0:57
Chapter: Questions Asked of the Horizon

Sunray,

Wow! You captured Jonathan’s grief and emotions really well. His thoughts were disjointed yet following the same path; they fit the mood just right.

I thought that adding his need to protect his sister as he couldn’t protect Moire was genius! It added a new dimension to the story. It gave him some hope, which I think fit very well.

The imagery you used was beautiful. The description of the clouds and sky was amazing! It gave the story a different feel, it gave it something that the reader can connect with, something we all have seen and understand.

Some of his thoughts were a little odd and didn’t make complete sense. His thoughts seemed to get very philosophical and sounded a bit strange. I understood them, but they seemed a little out of place near the end of the story.

Also, in the last paragraph you capitalize ‘He’ when it wasn’t at the beginning of the sentence multiple times.

Overall, I thought it was good! You really did a great job!

~Leah

Author's Response: Ooh! Leah! *huggles* Thanks for the review!! I'm glad you liked it! I fixed up the mistake you pointed out. The philosophical thoughts at the end came from the influence of a song I was listening to. They are meant to be weird, because Jon is slowly losing touch with this world and then is brought back by Rose. Once again, thank you so so so much for the review! ~Sunray

Reviewer: James Jameson
Date: 09/29/06 20:27
Chapter: Questions Asked of the Horizon

Awwwwwww...that is soooo sad! *brushes away a tear* I'm glad to be your first review.

Author's Response: Thanks for the review!!

You must login (register) to review.
Information
Find out everything you need to know about the site right here.


We have stories and authors in this archive.

:

RSS
Choose Theme:
SOCIAL MEDIA
     
MOST RECENT
MIT: Entente Cordial by Northumbrian 6th-7th Years
A strange and seemingly inexplicable death in London's West End brings an unlikely...
Allegiance by ToBeOrNotToBeAGryffindor 6th-7th Years
During his final year at Hogwarts, Draco Malfoy had few illusions about where...
Through the Mines by Nagini Riddle 1st-2nd Years
Tom Riddle remarks on the power he held while at the orphanage and at school.Written...
FEATURED
The Pretender by littlebird Professors
She feels the familiar pang of disappointment that they've never been better...
A Light in the Gap by WeasleyMom 3rd-5th Years
When Harry woke that first morning in Grimmauld Place, he wondered if Ron and...
Tapestry by Equinox Chick 1st-2nd Years
As Walburga Black stitches, Sirius rebels. Two poems written about the infamous...
The Weird Sisters - B-Sides and Rarities, Vol. 2 by ToBeOrNotToBeAGryffindor 1st-2nd Years
The Weird Sisters are back for an encore. Ten more tracks from your MNFF authors.
CATEGORIES