Wow. I really like this - I could imagine everything happening as you wrote it, and I could imagine other things happening, too, because the way you used words made me think more of the battle and try to find out what happened in it (in my head, of course, the seventh book isn't out yet...*sob*. Well, we only have to wait 'til 7/21/07!)
Okay, my favorite part:
Nothing but hate in your dark heart.
Very descriptive, even with so little words...and it describes Voldemort exactly - it is so perfect. He doesn't feel anything but hatred. That makes him seem so much more evil, in my mind. Great job.
One nitpick: Somehow, suddenly, he rises, standing tall -- looks at you but in part,
I think using both the words 'somehow' and 'suddenly' broke up the flow of that one line and made it seem more choppy than the rest of the poem and longer than it needed to be. I would suggest keeping the word 'somehow' and cutting the word 'suddenly', but you can do whatever you want - even keep it as is, if you would like.
Crimson blood falling,
Wow. Amazing imagery there, and a perfect beat.
Overall, this poem had perfect beat (except for aforementioned part - the suddenly and somehow thing) and the rhyming was great (I'm horrible at rhyming) and the poem was awesome even though it was simple. (With poems, it is good to be simple. Use few words, put across great meaning....that is what you did here.)
~Tyger, tyger, burning bright - Euphrates
Author's Response: Wow, thank you! I haven't been here in months but it's great to know that people still read this. And THANK YOU for the detailed comments. So helpful. Glad you liked it! :)
Don't see why you think you are such a bad author.... And, I'll assure you, I CAN NOT write poetry as well as this poem came out.
Author's Response: Aww... thanks. I don't really know why I think that either. I'm going through an insanely hard time right now, maybe that's why.
Author's Response: Thank you very much!
I really like it! You leave room for intrepretation as to how the battle goes. Meryal
Author's Response: Well thank you! Glad you liked it. ^_^