Oooh... Love it. Like it, love it, want it... Lovely. If there is one thing I must compliment you on, it is your characterization of Draco... It was perfect. Bravissima!
Author's Response: Thanks. I'm so glad you enjoyed it!
Oh wow, Shayla. I really enjoyed reading the story. The entire set up, the language and and the ending blended very well and created a really good effect. At least, Malfoy was not a 'good guy' in this...
Author's Response: Aww, thanks, Pooja. I'm glad you liked it.
Wow, I had to read it twice to fully understand it. The entire time, two words continued to come to mind: cocky and arrogant. While Draco knows that he really isn't of much value to the Dark Lord, he has placed himself in a mindset, making himself all powerful. It really shows Draco as being decietful and brave. Sometimes, though, I feel he was a bit too cocky. It would be only natural to feel fear at such a task, even if you had the upper hand.
All around, a very good job, Shayla. You captured many of the characteristics that Draco displayed in books One through Five and the beginning of book Six.
Author's Response: Thanks. I was trying to stick with canon!Draco as much as possible without straying to the "I'm so noble" Draco people often write him as. I'm glad you liked it.
Wow. Amazing story. The fact that we get to see what he's thinking is great. I admire how you can depict exactly why he is doing it.
"He offered me everything he thought I might want, but it was never enough. He couldn’t give me everlasting life, and he couldn’t give me eternal power. Those were things the Dark Lord could give."
That is my favorite part of the entire story. It just kind of makes you feel like his thoughts were justified... even though they weren't. :) Lovley work!
Author's Response: Heh, thanks Sarah. I always thought Draco might have reasons for doing what he did whether or not most people agreed with them.
Whoa...*steps back* Just kidding!
This fic, like all your others, was great! Malfoy's thoughts were quite ppwerful, in a sense that it really showed the reader how determined he was to prove Dumbledore wrong. At the same time, you can also see Malfoy's desperation to prove himself, which is spot on in characterisation.
I really liked this line: I’m doing this for everyone that has ever tried and failed to kill the man who had taken their pride.
This fiction was well-written, Shayla!
Author's Response: Heh. I'm glad you liked it. And it seems a lot of people liked that line. Thanks for the reivew!
You have truly brought the anger Draco is feeling to the forefront. The reader gets the feeling of his determination, and want of the power he is seeking. The reader totally knows what is in his mind; the belittling of his father, the mocking of Dumbledore, and the want to live forever in power.
The only thing that would contradict this in the books would be the half attempts at Dumbledore's life, but in your story they might not have happened.
Author's Response: This is AU as it's being written for the August Challenge. But I'm glad you liked it. Thanks for the review!
Hmm.. Interesting, Shayla...
I love the anger you protray in him, something that Draco!fangirl authors sincerely lack these days. You protrayed him as the boy thirsting to prove himself as most of us see him as. A couple errors were noticed, but nothing to get in a twist over. Great job, Shayla! You continue to impress me!
- Jacie the Cat
Author's Response: Hey! *scowl* I am NOT a Draco!fangirl, Jacie. Hehe. But I'm glad you liked it. Thanks for the review!
Your one-shot leads me to this thought: what would have happened if Draco had killed Dumbledore? I don't think that he's a killer, but you showed us his dark side, all his motivations to succeed in his mission. I like the way he thinks, we can see that he's not that weak character we tend to think he is. It's Draco from another angle, and it's great!
Author's Response: Hmm, thanks. I didn't really want to stray onto fanon!Draco, so I tried to have him do it for something we know he might do it for-- his father, and because he's self-obsessed. Thanks for the review!
Hmmm...I really liked this. It's a look at the selfish Draco were all used to from the books. I find in fan fiction most people try to make him softer, find the nicer side of him. I think of him as having a nicer side. Anyway, this was really fun to read.
I particularly liked this line, "Dumbledore doesn’t realise that being dead is not something one strives for." It made me grin.
The only thing I wondered about were Draco's motivations. At the beginning you said he was doing it only for himself. Then as the story progressed you said he was doing it for his father and his master as well.
Anyway, I really enjoyed. Good Job!
Author's Response: Yeah, I wanted the author to not quite know who he's doing it for as Draco is sort of a confused child. But I'm glad you liked it. Thanks for the review!
I like how you started and finished the AU challenge with dialogue, and the rest was pure thoughts and reasoning to what Draco was going to do. I especially thought it was interesting how Draco seemed to linger on the fact that it was Dumbledore that sent his father to Azkaban and that he wanted revenge for him. It kind of shows Draco in a new light; a better light.
I think my favourite line in the one-shot was, ‘For everyone that tried and failed numerous times to kill the one man who stood in the way of the Dark Lord and his never-ending reign.’ Like I said before, it justifies why Draco was so determined to kill Dumbledore, even though he refers to him as ‘the poor man.’
Best of luck in the challenge.
Author's Response: Thanks, Sour.Apple. I rather like this one-shot myself, as it shows a different side of Draco without falling into the fanon!Draco category. Thanks for the review!