One of the things I liked most about your story was the little details that you included that made things seem so real. Like how you stated that Jim's dog's hairs were hard to remove from his tweed coat, and how the head of the Unspeakables was missing a little finger. Little things like that really made the story pop for me.

The thoughts that Jim was having while he was near the veil that you included throughout the story were a very nice touch, and you wrote them very well, with word choices that were both eerie and resonating. They made me cold and shivery just reading them.

I think that you did an amzing job developing the character Stilton; his gruffness combined with his knowledge of unknown things made him memorable.

I enjoyed your story very much. Keep up the good work!!

Author's Response: Thank you very much for your kind words, it is always nice to know that a story is appreciatied. I'm glad you liked Stilton, he was originally the main character in an earlier draft. I was having trouble with him though- gruffness doesn't make for a very good narrator at times. So I introduced Jim instead. Nice to know that things can work out. Thanks again!