Here is the promised review... your characters are fine, so don't fuss about that. I had trouble reading the story, but that was more the formatting than the story itself. It looks promising - just try to add a little bang to it. Great start, though. :)

Author's Response: Yay! Thank you very much for reviewing Seren =D At least I don't have to worry about the way I wrote my characters so far ;)

Hiya Koroth Nice first chapter. I like how you explained a lot of information in the first three or four chapters, good work. If this is your first story, well done. I think you could describe who the characters are a little bit more but that’s nitpicking. I will be interested how the story progress’s. Again well done and keep it up. PS I think that the Neil Banks character sounds familiar to me but I don't know why!! mmmm lol. All the best Wiganlad

Author's Response: no, this isn't my first story. i've did other ones, but never really submitted them online. however, since i was able to get this first chapter up on here, i'll be glad to continue it!! and dont worry about the characters - they'll be revealed soon as the chapters get finished.