I think you've got the Snape and Draco characterization right. But something just doesn't click in this story for me. I think that Draco might be a bit off, and that's what's bothering me, but I'm not quite sure.

Hmm. I think that this moment was well-written, but it's not something that inspired emotion in me.

That's it. Though everything in technique, plot and characterization was well-done, this story didn't do anything in my heart..it left me sort of hollow-feeling.

Nice work, but I just wasn't connected to it as a reader. :(

Kumy

P.S. Review 4 of 5 for the August Review Challenge Prize.

Author's Response: I didn't like writing this piece, and it showed, eh? I had to write it to explain away some of the later events in TBWL. I don't write Draco or Snape very well, adn I think I didn't put as much efort into this as I should have...

Very dark. It's a new side to Draco, but I'm not sure I like it any more than I like him. Really cool potion not being drunk but absorbed through the skin-very clever!



Author's Response: Thank you! I don't like him much either, but I really wanted to give him some background for the death of Snape...