Reviews For Marie-Antoinette
Reviewer: sapphirestalker
Date: 01/19/07 20:29
Chapter: Chapter Four: A Black Ray of Sunlight

wow i really like this story, its so original and not at all like anything ive read before, keep it up!

Author's Response: I'll try. Thanks for the nice review!

Reviewer: Banana Shroogle
Date: 01/19/07 4:36
Chapter: Prologue

LOL, there is no real total oure blood wizards left in the wiarding world anymore.

Suck on that, Tom.

Author's Response: Yes, but those I'm talking about are as pure as one can get. Thanks for that (strange) review :)

Reviewer: WintersHeart
Date: 01/18/07 16:59
Chapter: Chapter Four: A Black Ray of Sunlight

Hey, this is fantastic! And that was such a mean cliffy! i was just going to press 'Next' and there was no 'Next'!!

This really is fabulous, please update soon!

WintersHeart

Author's Response: I'm trying to; thanks for the review, and sorry about the cliffhanger.

Reviewer: WintersHeart
Date: 01/18/07 16:54
Chapter: Chapter Four: A Black Ray of Sunlight

Hey, this is fantastic! And that was such a mean cliffy! i was just going to press 'Next' and there was no 'Next'!!

This really is fabulous, please update soon!

WintersHeart

Reviewer: Meme0
Date: 01/17/07 7:16
Chapter: Chapter Four: A Black Ray of Sunlight

Oooh! I loved it! It's really really great. But I have to admitt, even though I'm a very rebelious &-erm- "frantic" Sirius-fan, I think that Marie is better with Olivier, not Sirius. & I really can't wait to see what she'll find out about James. I personally would love to read another part from James's POV.

All in all, it is great. can't wait for an update.

Author's Response: Thanks. You don't have to assume that Marie-Antoinette is attracted to Sirius, she may only be craving for a friend. I'm trying to update, please be patient with me. Thanks again for the review!

Reviewer: mock_turtle
Date: 01/15/07 15:45
Chapter: Chapter Four: A Black Ray of Sunlight

pleeeeeeze update soooon!!!!

Author's Response: Trying!

Reviewer: BlackClaude
Date: 01/14/07 13:37
Chapter: Chapter Four: A Black Ray of Sunlight

I am absolutely forlorn that the story ends here and you won't be updating for so long. I love that the story is turning towards Sirius! I didn't see how it would work with James when he'd never get over Lily, but I can see Marie and Sirius together perfectly. The way he thought about her in the beginning made my heart melt. Oh, this story is too good to fade away! Good luck in school, but don't forget to update eventually!

Author's Response: I won't! Thanks for the review, and you shouldn't lose hope about James... though I admit he won't exactly get over Lily... and now I'll stop before I give too much away =P. I'm trying to update in the coming weeks.

Reviewer: BlackClaude
Date: 01/14/07 12:03
Chapter: Chapter Two: A contract of ashes and blood

Fantastic, of course! I absolutely loved James and Sirius in this chapter. Sirius's loyalty and protectiveness of James was perfect, and James story of Lily was heartbreaking. (I almost feel like he gave up too easily, though. Couldn't they have Apparated somewhere far away? Lily wouldn't need her wand for that.)

One thing that stuck out at me was using "their" for Bellatrix. I know you wanted to hide her gender, but I think that would have been better done by rephrasing: "The cloaked figure took a step forward, brandishing a wand, and seemed to hesitate for a minute or two. Then, to my utter astonishment, the wand pointed at me and a voice came from under the hood:"

All of your characters are so well-written, and I'm glad that Marie has finally decided to stand up for herself! I'm hooked, on to the next one. :)

Author's Response: About the Apparition: they were taken to Lestrange by Death Eaters, who had most likely "secured" them by anti-Apparition bonds/wards. You also need to take into account that James was afraid to get his son or wife hurt by resisting the Death Eaters.

About the use of "their": my Beta didn't seem to see anything wrong with it. Thanks for the advice, though, I'll try to avoid the use of "they" in the future.

Thank you for the constructive review. Hope you like the rest!

Reviewer: BlackClaude
Date: 01/14/07 11:37
Chapter: Chapter One: Adieux and exile

Another great chapter! I am so loving this. There a lot of great little touches, like the clans, the battle painting, the way Madame Maxime's breath caused Marie's hair to flutter. :) And the sinisterness of the world is great, with Lestrange just dripping evil and the treatment of the half-bloods and Muggles. (Where did they all go? Dead? Relocated to Antarctica?) Again, no criticisms. Great job!

Author's Response: Thanks a lot! You'll know later what became of the Muggles. I'm happy you love the story.

Reviewer: BlackClaude
Date: 01/14/07 10:37
Chapter: Prologue

I loved it! It's exceedingly well-written and I love the plotline. (I cheered when I read James Potter's name) :) The alternate universe is well-done and creepy; you've made the concept of the death eaters in power and forced arranged marriages real. I don't think I have a thing to criticize, just one typo to point out: "I heard to door closing behind her." I can't wait to read the next chapter now!

Author's Response: Thanks for pointing out the typo, I'll fix it eventually. Thank you too for a review that is both interesting and very nice, and I hope you like the rest.

Reviewer: HeartbreakerLily13
Date: 01/12/07 16:31
Chapter: Chapter Four: A Black Ray of Sunlight

I love it! Keep writing please! LOL :)

Author's Response: I'll try. Thanks for the review.

Reviewer: rivers of gold
Date: 01/08/07 23:56
Chapter: Chapter Four: A Black Ray of Sunlight

Wow...this story is great too...so well-written and interesting, and I had a lump in my throat a few times during this chapter...I just feel so SORRY for them both. I like that you're making Sirius be friendly.

I still don't understand though what the whole point of that marriage was. Ah well...I suppose I'll find out...and much as I would like to sympathize with Toine, I just feel so sorry for Lily/Harry/James! This is just sad from all sides, and a lose/lose situation.

unless they plan a secret revolt against voldemort...yeah, that'd be nice... :D

Author's Response: Well... you do mention extremely interesting points! A secret revolt against Voldemort... Nah, not tellin'. ;)

The whole point of the marriage will be explained later on. Thanks for the review!

Reviewer: wishingforthehallows
Date: 01/04/07 21:06
Chapter: Chapter Four: A Black Ray of Sunlight

Why be a doctor when you can be poor and just write fan fic all day? You'd certainly be saving my life (or day at least). Update soon Dr.Tinn Tam!!!

Author's Response: I'll try! And as for being poor and write ff all day, unfortunately it isn't an option when you also have to pay for the Internet connection :). Thanks for this review.

Reviewer: wishingforthehallows
Date: 01/04/07 19:24
Chapter: Prologue

WHAT!?!?!? Lestrange Minister of Magic??? Crazy, but very excited!!!!

Author's Response: Crazy, but very... excited? Not sure about what exactly you mean here, but I'll take that as a compliment ;). Thanks for the review.

Reviewer: POTTER_gurl_WANNABE
Date: 01/03/07 18:25
Chapter: Chapter Four: A Black Ray of Sunlight

HI, I just wanted to say the whole plot of your story is sooo out of the box...like I would never have thought of it in a million years! I can't wait for the next chapter...and I hope the whole thing has a happy ending!

Author's Response: Not sure about the happy ending, but don't worry, the story will be completed. Thanks for the review.

Reviewer: Dory_the_Fishie
Date: 01/02/07 14:23
Chapter: Chapter Four: A Black Ray of Sunlight

Iíve been following this fic from the prologue, but Iím afraid Iíve been a terrible reviewer. Hopefully this review makes up for that. =)

Not only have I been following this fic from the beginning, but Iíve been in love with it from the beginning. The way youíve created an AU world that isnít clichť or too strange or completely unbelievable is wonderful; Iím impressed. I feel like youíve really thought this out Ė youíve sat down and decided who your characters are, what your plot is, and how you want to accomplish this story. One of my favorite parts about this is, quite simply, your writing. Itís descriptive, engaging, and quite delectable, actually. You balance the narration and dialogue quite well. I donít feel like either one is dominating the chapter.

Marie-Antoinette is a great OC, no doubt about that. One of the best Iíve seen in a long time, honestly. Sheís not perfect Ė she has flaws, and sheís not entirely sure of herself (understandable, of course Ė I wouldnít be too confident in her situation, I donít think). I think Marie-Antoinette has immense potential for future chapters. She has room to grow and develop; she isnít all there yet right from the start. I think my favorite aspect of Marie-Antoinetteís character, illustrated excellently in this chapter, is her determination. She dives into taming the garden even though itís a very unappealing task. I love her determination to make something of the life sheís been thrust into hers. Sheís resolved to make the most of her situation; itís admirable.

I absolutely love Siriusís appearance in this chapter. I figured that, with James quite suddenly not around, somebody would have to come in and shake things up a bit. It was the right time to bring somebody else in Ė any longer with just Marie-Antoinette would have been too long, I think. Do I sense some chemistry between Mr. Black and the new Mrs. Potter? Youíve introduced something interesting. Iím excited to see more of this story!

The relationship between Marie-Antoinette and Aimťe is wonderful. I feel really bad for Marie-Antoinette, being taken away from her best friend like she was, but youíve kept Aimťe a strong character in Marie-Antoinetteís life through her letters. And I feel positively horrible for Olivier; his letter was a nice touch.

And finally, the end to this chapter! Youíve done an excellent job with the cliffhangers in this story. Is the visitor Lestrange or James? One guess is as good as the other. I personally hope itís James, because Iím eager to see a little interaction between the newlyweds.

I hope to see more of this soon. I guarantee Iíll do a happy dance when itís updated! =)

Reviewer: MagEd
Date: 12/17/06 22:22
Chapter: Chapter Four: A Black Ray of Sunlight

I was bored out of my mind on a Sunday night and I came across your story again. Though I've read it before, I found myself immersed in it and read it through a second time. You really have created a wonderful character in your Marie-Antoinette, you deserved to win the award, not just runner-up. I like the scenes from other characters POV, they give the story a little more depth. Really, I can't say anything but good of the fic. Naturally, I'm dying to find out what happens next -- but I can totally understand being busy with, you know, the REAL world! I look forward to when you do finally update, in the distant future. Again, a wonderful fic, one of my favorites!

Author's Response: Thanks a lot! I've heard the fic came close to winning the award, but since (among other reasons) it was on hold, another story rightly won it. I'll try to update asap.

Reviewer: Aerina
Date: 12/12/06 16:01
Chapter: Chapter Four: A Black Ray of Sunlight

please do write more soon. i really love it. i am fairly anxious to read more! :)

*~.:Aerina:.~*

Author's Response: I'll try. Thanks for the review, and I'm glad you liked it.

Reviewer: Hatusu
Date: 11/19/06 23:16
Chapter: Chapter Four: A Black Ray of Sunlight

Wow. I've really got to commend you on this story; you've come up with a fascinating concept and it's executed wonderfully. I'm really impressed with the restraint you've used with the plot, a slow build up that always leaves readers wanting more. This is the first fanfic that's held my interest for a while; usually I'm just too busy to read all the way through a story, but this one just sucked me in.

I discovered this through the QQ awards, and you definitely deserved runner-up(if not winner); this story deserves a lot more recognition than it currently has, congrats on your award!

Your writing style ranges from slightly inexperienced to nothing short of amazing, IMHO. You've got some real talent; the metaphors, the way you put together sentences, it's all way above average. A little more practice and I think you could be the best writer on here-- you're already outstanding! :D

It's all good, the plot and characterization and pacing and whatever, I'm hooked.

I'm dying to find out what happens next; rumour has it that this story is on hold? I hope that's not true; please keep going, you're amazing!!

Peace out
Hatusu


Author's Response: Thanks for the review; I'm very proud that my fic was able to hold your interest, though it makes me all the more guiltier of not being able to update it for a while... Thank you for the congrats, too :). From what I've understood, this fic very nearly won the award. Still, I'm very happy with the runner-up position!

Your "slightly inexperienced" comment may be explained by the fact I'm not writing in my native tongue... I've been writing in English for a little less than a year, and I still need practice. I'm glad you weren't discouraged by my occasional clumsiness.

Thank you, again, for the long and detailed review.

Reviewer: obsessedhpchick
Date: 11/12/06 21:34
Chapter: Prologue

by the way Marie A's hair was blonde...

i'm not just saying that because i saw the movie... i'm acually learning about the French Revolution in my school right now...

-a new fan-

Author's Response: Thanks for the info, but I have to tell you: I don't care what colour Marie-Antoinette's hair/eyes/skin were. Marie-Antoinette de Syrnac is an original character with her own characteristics, even though her life is oddly similar to the Queen's. I didn't see the movie, and I learnt about the French revolution quite a long time ago :)

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