Oh! You almost made me cry (in a good way...) Great one-shot, the last line was my favorite. Nice job!
Author's Response: thank you so much for the kind words!
All i can say is wow!
That story is really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really FANTASTIC!!!
Author's Response: thank you so much! :D
That was just beautiful.
Author's Response: thanks for the review!
This was very touching and had alot of feeling in it. Great job!
Author's Response: thank you!
Oh my gosh, that was so good! I especially like the end, it reminds me of 'Titanic', though it's not exactly the same. You used a variety of words, came up with a good way to get rid of Harry (excuse the vulgarity), and captured Ginny's feelings very well. Great job! A perfect 10!
Author's Response: Why thank you! I'm glad you liked it!
loved it! quite sad, but we might be seeing something similar to this in DH (hope not).
Author's Response: thanks! XD
DON'T MAKE HARRY BLOODY DIE!!!!!!!!!!!
Author's Response: Sorry, not much of a Harry fan, myself.
A poignant, beautiful and powerful one-shot, Rachel!
Rain was pouring onto the rooftop; the only sound that could be heard through the empty house. It would have been eerie, almost, had this not been the atmosphere presented to her each day. Possibly it may have seemed frightening to someone else. But this was the life that she knew, for now.
These sentences from the second paragraph are striking. I love the way you blend the descriptions with Ginny's dark emotions; it drew me in and made me feel sorry for her.
That scene in which Harry proposes to her is somewhat angsty; very different from most fluffy (and a tad boring, perhaps) fics. Harry was very in-character; I love the way in which he genuinely cared for Ginny and still loved her. While I felt that Ginny would be more relaxed, casual and happy in such a situation, that didn't prevent me from enjoying the scene.
I do have a small bit of advice, though. I think it'll be easier for the reader to differentiate between the past and the present if you could put the proposal scene in italics or put a horizontal line (you can use the < hr > tag without the spaces) at the beginning and end of the flashback.
Coming back to the praise, I like your personal way of informing the reader about the death. Hermione sobbing at Ginny's door before telling her about Harry is definitely much more powerful than Ginny receiving a letter from Ron or Hermione. That would make the scene somewhat ... impersonal.
I've never read a romance fic with such darkness (it's great, really). Good job with the creepy descriptions of the rain and the cold overtones.
But for now, all she could do was let the rain fall.
I've read many fics that use the last line as the title of the story. In your case, I feel it is fitting. As for this sentence itself ... simply powerful. Even though I wish the story could've been a little longer, I can't wait to read more one-shots written by you!
Author's Response: MINI!!!!!!! *SPEWtwinhugglesquee* I cannot thank you enough for this wonderful review! Now I know why you got accepted to SPEW! Anyway, yes, I've gotten the concrit that I should separate the flashbacks from the present, so I suppose that I should take it into account one of these days. ;) Thanks for pointing that out; I'll try to see where that would work with the story. And thanks for all of your brilliant comments; this really made my day! ♥
Whoa... that was powerful. I've noticed that most of your stories are powerful. I liked the ending line. It was a perfect finish to a perfect story. Enough said.
Author's Response: Haha, yes, I do enjoy powerful stories! And ending lines tend to be my forte, odd as that is. Thanks SO incredibly much for this wonderful review! I hope you keep reading my stories, I've got a few that I'm planning to submit soon! ;)
tears in my eyes
Author's Response: ...thanks? LOL.
Very touching. So emotional! Another beautiful story by you! You are my favorite author on fan fiction. Your stories are just beautiful
But...(There's always a but) there's just one thing. It got kind of confusing when Ginny went back to her memories because there was no symbol or anything to tell the readers it's another place or point in time. That's my only critque
Otherwise, it was BRILLIANT!!! :-)
Author's Response: Aw, thank you! I feel so honored to be your favorite author on MNFF! Haha, I've been told that my flashbacks are a bit confusing. I've always disliked the *** symbols and all that, but I think I'll just italicize them when I get the time. Again, thank you for the wonderful review, and the critique!
Awwww...wonderful story, great imagery, no noticeable errors...what's not to like? I'm adding you to my favorite authors list RIGHT NOW!!!
Author's Response: Aw, thanks so much! Actually, I think there's a lot not to like, but authors always think that about their stories, now, don't they? *giggles* Anyway, thanks for the review, and I'm glad you liked the story!
that was so sad! and so well written. Brilliant
Author's Response: Aw... thanks so much!
This was very touching! You did a wonderful job of tugging the readers' heartstrings. You are able to write emotionally without just describing the emotion - both the characters and the readers feel it. Nice job. I particularly liked the ending, when Ginny took off her ring - very sad! And tying the last line to the title was fantastic! ~Gina :)
Author's Response: GINA! *Tacklehugs* Wheeeeeee, tacklehugging is fun! :D Anyway, thanks SO much for the lovely review! I'm so glad you liked the story! I'll be sure to read/review one of your stories, soon! :D
Wow. I really should've believed you that this was uber sad... you have me a bit teary eyed....
Overall, great job! I'm such a sucker for those fics that use rain, but what I love about this fic is that the whole thing might seem to center around rain, but you only mention it a couple times. I also like how the "rain" is both the rain outside, and the tears that she is crying (or maybe I'm just overanalyzing...).
Hmmm...concrit: this is probably more of a personal thing, but "Harry, too, had fallen. Harry, too, was dead." I really liked that, and I believe you're trying to use repeats? I like repeats, but I usually like working in groups of three so it's known as a repeatition for style. But I guess you can also work with twos... I guess it's more of a personal preference...
But overall, great job! And sorry if I confused you, or just wasted a bunch of space guessing and all that. =)
Author's Response: Nope, your analytical skills are right on the dot! I didn't even think about that until i wrote the last line, though. Thanks for the concrit. Yes, I tend to use repeats quite a lot, and I agree that they aren't as strong in twos, but hey, I couldn't think of a third one. I think it's fine, but I apprreciate your comments. And no, I'm not confused, and all of your guesses are accurate! =)
"The rain was falling steadily, echoing her unfading feeling of melancholy." I love this line! It just stuck out for me.
You did a great job with capturing the mood of the piece. The emotion was described really well. You could feel Ginny's sorrow.
I wonder though, where is everyone else? I know Hermione survived and I am guessing Ron. But where are they and the rest of her family? I don't see them leaving her alone in her misery. I could Molly and the twins trying to make her feel better, especially on the day Harry proposed.
Author's Response: You had me laughing SO hard when I read 'where is everyone else?' Everyone tends to rave about this story for some reason, saying how sad it is; it's like it's just Ginny's world. Then you point out that I'm only missing something-- everyone else. Lol, I don't know. I guess they all died or something?? I don't know why I put Hermione in it and not Ron, and I don't know where Ginny's family is. I guess I should just say 'uber character death' in my summary. LOL thanks for the review!
I liked how you started with the ending, so to speak, making Ginny’s memories all the sadder, as we know what will happen. “She wanted to stop there, to make up her own happy ending.” That line is so sweet, so touching, I really love it.
I do have one question - why wasn’t Ginny fighting too? I doesn’t really seem like her, to stay home and wait for news, I would have thought she would be out on the battlefield, helping Harry, doing what she believed in.
“Was it selfish for her to feel pain? Was it wrong for her to cry for her own grief when the world was rejoicing?” This reminded me of ‘I Never Knew You’, of how the character is presented with an impossible battle of emotions, how unfair it is for them. It makes very good reading though!
This was a really moving read, Ginny’s emotions were especially well done. Once again (again!), a great last line, a wonderful way to end it. Well done.
Author's Response: Thanks! Glad you liked it! I like that line too! And no, I don't have the slightest clue why Ginny wasn't fighting. I never actually thought about it. And yes, it probably is similar to INKY. I have quite a few self-cliches. Thanks so much for reviewing!
Oh how sad. You know, when I saw the title of this story, I had prepared myself for a song-fic of Hilary Duff's work. Yeah, I know. Boy, do I feel like an idiot.
It was a bit confusing where the memory stopped and where it ended. Perhaps the memory should be italicized. This confusion over memory also had me confused about the timeline. At first, I thought Harry died two days after proposing. Then I thought Harry died two days and a year after he proposed. *scratches head* It took a while to return to my original thought. There are also a couple of spelling things, but you're getting around editing, so I won't bother you about that. :)
You did very well capturing Ginny's emotions and her intense pain. I thought, though, it might've been more meaningful, and more fitting for your title, if Ginny had held back her tears until the very end when it was raining. Then she would've let go. But, I also understand that "let the rain fall" also symbolized Ginny's hopelessnes and inability to change what had happened. Dual meaning is always good :D
Author's Response: Huh? Hilary Duff? Ohmigod, I haven't heard that song in like... forever! Hopefully you're the only one who thought that, Beth! Yeah, I agree, italicization might be a very good thing, here. Yay for dual meaning! (Sorry I confused you!) Thanks for the review!
I've reviewed before, and now I'm expanding it.
I love your descriptions, they really give me a feel of where Ginny is.
That was some wonderful characterazation. Ginny is emotional but strong. At Dumbledore's funeral, she cried just as Hermione did, but dried them up and faced what was to come. That's just like she's doing here. She has cried her tears for Harry, and is ready to start her way back to normlacy.
Rain was pouring onto the rooftop; the only sound that could be heard through the empty house. It would have been eerie, almost, had this not been the atmosphere presented to her each day. Possibly it may have seemed frightening to someone else. But this was the life that she knew, for now. The only life she had known for a while. Perhaps she wanted change. Something else to occur to make her life meaningful. But all she was aware of was pain. All she was ever aware of.
That paragraph packs a punch. It's emotional and decriptive, as well as setting the mood for the rest of the story.
This was amazing, and I'm not usually that fond of one-shots. I really hope you write more!
Author's Response: You reviewed before? *Scrolls* Oh yeah, there it is! Thanks for the lovely comments; they meant a lot! Glad you liked it even though you don't like one shots. I adore one shots; I get tired of chaptered fics after a while. Thanks!
I really liked your story! But hopefully Harry won’t die in the seventh book- I would be rather distraught. =]
Your characterization of Ginny in this fic is easily the strong point. She (in my opinion) is one of the hardest canon characters to write, and you did a great job. You give her realistic feelings, and write her grieving process wonderfully.
Also, like everyone else, I thought the correlation between the rain and tears was very well done. And, once again your ending line was very good.
Well, great job!
Author's Response: Haha, thanks, I should go into a business writing ending lines. That would be SO cool. Ahem. Thanks for the wonderful comments, and I'll keep my fingers crossed for Harry!