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Reviews For Euthanasia

Name: death_eater_girl (Signed) · Date: 07/14/07 12:36 · For: Chapter 1
i think that this story is AWESOME!!!!! it's a bit sad, but probobly thats what will happen in the 7th book (more or less).

Name: Sly Severus (Signed) · Date: 05/06/07 22:48 · For: Chapter 1
First of all, your opening paragraph was amazing. You immediately set the dark mood of the story. Even after reading the first sentence, I knew this was going to be a chilling story. Your description is remarkable.

You handled Dracoís character very well. He showed feelings towards his family, but remained IC at all times. You said it yourself, near the end of the story, he continued to think like a Malfoy.

'Your mother would have been proud, Draco. She'd have loved to see you return victorious...' the Dark Lord paused, 'as would your father.' This completely caught Draco off his guard, and he looked up into the scarlet eyes with cat-like slits for pupils. 'I'm afraid you are too late.' His hand left Draco's shoulder as he drifted behind the mysterious green fire.

This was eerie. I canít imagine this being the way Draco is told about his parentsí deaths. In this tiny paragraph the Dark Lordís cruelty shines through. I felt for Draco when reading this. His reaction was inevitable. Clearly, the Dark Lord had decided to kill him, rather or not he was successful in his mission. He must have known Draco could not continue to serve him, after his parentsí deaths.

Bellatrix, a woman known to have the grit of steel, was suddenly speechless as she looked at the innocence on her nephew's face. There was a lump in her throat that she couldn't gulp down.

I loved this. With this very brief statement, you have shown Bellaís human side. I have always believed that she truly loves her family. It would be very difficult for her to confirm for her nephew that his parents are dead. This paragraph showed her pain very well.

He glanced at his aunt. When everyone else had left him to die, she was the only one who came to him. She was crumpled in a heap, taking deep breaths. She's sleeping. Run Draco, run now and don't look back.

*cries* Bella clearly loves him and went to a lot of effort to find him. She is trying to keep him safe. If she wanted to hurt him, she would have turned him over to the Dark Lord right away. I donít understand why Draco would leave her like that. I know he is hurting and he wants out, but Bella is the only one he has left. Heís the only one she has left. It seems so wrong for him to just leave her like that. I canít imagine what she will feel when she wakes in the morning to find that he left and was killed.

You are a Malfoy. Malfoys can't just break down. He thought sternly. You are strong Draco, control yourself. But he couldn't help it; he slumped against the memorial and broke down into heavy tears.

This was amazing. It describes Dracoís character perfectly. It shows the things that Lucius would teach his son, and it shows that Draco took those things to heart. This was a wonderful summary of Dracoís entire character.

I do have a couple of nit-picks:

He swollen eyes suddenly jerked open. He should be His.

Unconscious, he could not fell being rolled down roughly in a dark corner, and being left there to die... Fell should be feel.

He tried getting up, ignoring the stinging pain in his back and stomach but his feet were wobbly, and he almost fell down again as got up on his feet. In this sentence you have used the word feet twice. I would consider revising to avoid this. Sentences get awkward and the flow is thrown off when a word is used twice in the same sentence.

Anyway, overall, I think this was a really good story. You showed Draco and Bella to be human, which they are, although it is often overlooked. Very well done.

Name: joybelle423 (Signed) · Date: 03/16/07 21:59 · For: Chapter 1
Wow, what a chilling story. I canít believe this is your first fanfic Ė itís marvellously written. From the first paragraph, your writing pulled me in to the story with your exquisite descriptions and spooky setting. You really made Draco a sympathetic character Ė I felt so sorry for him! He really was trapped, wasnít he? I like that you made his relationship with his parents a loving one. There are too many stories out there with a tortured, abused Draco, but I find this a lot more believable. It explains why he would go to such lengths to protect his parents. My heart ached for him when he found out his parents had been murdered. That really shows the cruelty of Voldemort and his enjoyment of seeing others in pain. I also enjoyed your characterisation of Bellatrix. We never see her from anyoneís point of view but Harryís, and itís quite possible that she could still care for her family, even under Voldemortís grasp.

The way you told the story, it really seemed clear to me that Dracoís death was a blessing to him. He was in utter agony, completely hopeless and helpless, with nowhere to go and no one to turn to. He had nothing left to live for. Voldemort would probably be furious to realise that he had done Draco a favour, donít you think? Itís a beautifully bittersweet ending.

I also really enjoyed your use of flashbacks to tell the story Ė they were very effective and made sense in the context that they were written.

While I read, I noticed a few little mistakes, so itís nitpick time!

In the first sentence of the second paragraph, it should be: His swollen eyes suddenly jerked open.

Then, after Draco is tortured, it should be: Unconscious, he could not feel being rolled down roughly in a dark corner, and being left there to die ...

Then in the paragraph after he finds his parentsí graves, you have a section of Dracoís thoughts in italics, but thereís a bit that shouldnít be. It should read: Malfoys canít just break down, he thought sternly. You are strong, Draco; control yourself.

And then, in the very last sentence, ďDisapparatedĒ should be capitalised.

Reading it again, Iím still struck with emotion. Excellent job! Iím looking forward to seeing more from you!


Author's Response: OMG!!!! thanks a million abigail, for this brilliant review.. its not often that people write more than 5 lines.. and i recieved an in-depth analysis.. WOW.. about the mistakes, i'll make sure i correct them as soon as possible.. thanks once more for the truly wonderful review!!

Name: pinktat (Signed) · Date: 11/09/06 11:43 · For: Chapter 1
Very well wriiten. Brilliant angle to take the story in, well done!

Author's Response: Thank u...hopefully this angle does get included somehow lol

Name: Narci Jones (Signed) · Date: 06/26/06 21:44 · For: Chapter 1
wellllll u could have told me that b4!!!! *tear!!!* im crying!!!!!! *waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!* I LOVE DRACO!!!........although i shouldnt.........well he is just so my favorite!!!!

Author's Response: thanx Narci...sorry if reading abt Draco dying disturbed u a bit ; )..thnx fr the review once again..

Name: Evilpersonified (Signed) · Date: 06/07/06 16:40 · For: Chapter 1

First of all, I quite like the premis. Seeing what happens after Draco disobeyed Voldemort--or forced Snape to kill Dumbledore--has made the wait for the 7th book a little bit less painful. :)

I do have a few little critisms though, if you don't mind! ^^ First of all, some of your sentences don't really flow together very well, which makes your writing jarring and really disrupts the readers attention. The second thing is that describing Voldemort as the most evil wizard ever is a little bit...anticlimactic, hehe, if you know what I mean. I guess it just sounds sort of like a five year old talking about their most evil teacher ever. But I degress.

Now, for things I really liked: Draco was quite in character. I liked his conflict between asking for help from Harry and keeping a stiff upper lip, Malfoy style. And as morbid as it sounds, I quite liked that his parents were killed. Seemed like something Voldemort would do. Oh, and of course I like the end. hehe Very in character for Voldemort. I also liked how Bellatrix showed emotion for Draco. This isn't generally how I write Bellatrix (in my fics she's always very disturbed...>.>) but yeah, I liked that dimention of her.

This concludes this review. I hoped I was helpful, and I will be reading some more of your stuff quite soon I think.

Author's Response: THanks a lot for this review. Nothing helps a budding writer more than constructive critisism. This is my first FF, so i guess the writing is not that refined. But you can look forward to better stuff from me in the future. Thanks for taking the time to read it and, yes, you helped : )

Name: hogwartsduchess (Anonymous) · Date: 06/06/06 14:39 · For: Chapter 1
Why didn't you tell me this had been accepted!

I love the changes you made! I know it's not my turn to review for you (review circle and all that) but I have been waiting for this fic for ages!

Thanks for the byline at the top, and keep up the great work!

Name: BlueJay (Signed) · Date: 05/15/06 20:57 · For: Chapter 1
AWESOME!! I never thought someone could bring out the good in Draco!! But you did! And yeah, everyone, however bad, has some amount of good in them!! I loved it. U are so good! And your writing reminds me of JKR's Picturesque writing. Thats all I have to say.

Author's Response: Thanks. that's really sweet.

Name: Vorona (Signed) · Date: 05/12/06 1:29 · For: Chapter 1
This was really powerful. One thing I would suggest: don't write "**flashback**" It takes people out of the story. Instead, give a reason for Draco to remember the event in question.

Author's Response: Thanks Vorona. Its really good to see constructive reviews for my first FF :-D. I'll make the changes as suggested by you when I update. Right now I'm working on my new romantic fic. Cheerio.

Name: hogwartsduchess (Anonymous) · Date: 05/11/06 9:21 · For: Chapter 1
I was really pleased to see this fic up. I told you from the beginning I enjoyed it, though I am not a fan of Malfoy myself. I think you have real potential and I can't wait to see what else you come up with.

Author's Response: thanks a lot !! Seriously, it was your help that got this fic out. I'm writing a romantic fic with DM/HG. It's being betad right now so guess will be up in a few days(hopefully). Thanks for taking the time to read it. Cheerio :-)

Name: Trucker (Signed) · Date: 05/02/06 1:12 · For: Chapter 1
I found only one problem in your story... Bellatrix acting like a person with a soul! In most fanfics she's completely insane, as likely to kill Draco as anyone else! Actually, I think even psychotic killers like Bella still have normal, lucid moments when they'd regret the loss of their family members.

Keep writing! You're good.

Author's Response: A/N Thanx for the review! Ya, I know its kind of wierd for Bellatrix to be in a pensieve mood, but I figured even the most ruthless of people might have a heart too.

Author's Response: A/N Thanx for the review! Ya, I know its kind of wierd for Bellatrix to be in a pensieve mood, but I figured even the most ruthless of people might have a heart too.

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