Only three reviews? My dear, you deserve a million!
Waaay back on the old forums, I saw the wonderful banner you made for this story and have always wanted to read it. Actually, I believe I read it but didn't leave you a review. Well, it's high time I do this now, isn't it?
Where to begin? This poem has more elements in it than meets the eye and I'll see if I can capture them all.
Was it my fault you turned out the way you did?
Perfect, perfect, perfect. Stunning opening line; you definitely have the readers reading the poem. This line shows many things: the tone of the poem, the overall mood of the poem, the wondering, sad component throughout the poem, Hermione's thoughts...the list could go on and on. The way that she asks herself: Was it my fault? is so like Hermione. Only Hermione would notice such a thing and perhaps blame it on herself.
The questions between the stanzas are poignant, powerful lines. They are the ones that truly portray what's going on; the stanzas inbetween are fillers, yet touching all the same.
This is such a sad and melancholy poem and I'm sure that the result you wanted from the readers -- thoughtfulness, stillness, even having them mourn for the girl that had no friends -- succeeded.
Author's Response: You read my mind, love.
Or rather, you read my poem and understood it completely. I really love this poem myself because it touches so many thoughts inside myself and I can totally relate to Eloise.
Thank you, dear, for this very lovely review. You're the bestest.
Oh wow...poignant. It reminds me of some regrets of my past, as well, both as the subject and the speaker. I like the pattern, asking a question at the beginning of the stanza and then going into a bit more detail. Though I'm having trouble figuring out who it was...very fitting with the theme, indeed! My only critique is that it's hard for me to figure out the rhyme scheme; is it free verse, or some obscure form of rhyme I've never seen? There are random lines that rhyme, like "mind" and "behind" in the 3rd and 4th stanzas, respectively. But maybe that's because I haven't read much poetry that I'm confused.
P.S.: Oh, and the banner is GORGEOUS, by the way!
Author's Response: Thanks, Risa, for that lovely review.
The subject of the poem is Eloise Midgen and the speaker is Hermione. It makes more sense if you read the summary first. AS for the rhyme scheme; there is non what so ever. It's all free verse, baby.
And thanks for the banner comment ;-)
I love reading poetry, but can't write it to save my life! I can tell you have enormous amounts of talent, just waiting to break free. I really enjoyed this poem, and it got me thinking about how I treat people and teh way I live my life, not many authors can provoke thought. Great job!
Author's Response: Wow. Thank you so much. I don't know what to say. I'm really glad this poem has put your life in a new perspective. Keep up the good reviewing ;-)
Wow! Eloise Midgen?How original!!! Yes, I can finally log in! This was really good, and I think a lot more people than just Eloise Midgen can appreciate this! I can't believe I'm the only review. And I love this poem's banner, by the way!
Author's Response: Thank you so much. I'm really glad you liked it. And yay, you can finally log in.