I read the poem and was a bit confused... but after I read the summary you gave in someone else's review I re-read it an it made sense. It was wonderful and well-written--after I knew what was going on.
It was a little confusing, but I think you did a wonderful job. There was nice...flow with the words, and everything fit well.
What a powerful poem! It has wonderful rythem, I love how almost every verse starts with a characters name. I also like that we don't know what happened, it makes it even more extreme. My only concrit is that the verse begining with "In realtiy" is a bit different from the rest, making it sound a bit choppy. But don't pay too much attention to me, I have no knowledge about poems! Great job!!
wow, that was wicked deep. double cool with knobs if i do say so myself. kudos dear :]
Wait...So Susan killed Ginny? Why? I'm REALLY confused right now...
Author's Response: Oh dear...I thought this might be a problem to understand...
I guess it's a poem, so you can take it any way you want, but this is what I had intended when I was writing it:
Susan's waiting for her friend, and she hear's a scream, but her friend arrivesand she decides she can't be bothered to investigate and goes off with her friend. The scream is Hermione who has been abducted by the remnants of the Death Eaters, she is killed. She is a midwife at St. Mungo's and the only senior one on duty, while Ginny is pregnant, but she has some sort of fever. As Hermione doesn't arrive, no-one knows what to do about Ginny and still save the baby. Therefore Susan Bones is indirectly responsible for killing Hermione and Ginny's baby. I hadn't imtended for it to look as though Ginny died...but hey...it got the message across.
Sad, very sad. So Susan Bones killed a pregnant Ginny?
I think you meant this to bring tears to peoples' eyes, but it got kind of confusing because of all the commas. If you took them out (no commas in poetry are needed) it would make more sense, I think.
Author's Response: Thanks, I'll have a look at those pesky commas!
Whoa! That was very powerful...I want to help people now. I love it! You did a great job! And this is a perfect example as to why I'm not in SPEW...;)
Author's Response: Well, vwe all need a fluffy review every now and then!
I like the idea of this poem, but it's a little confusing. I'm not sure exactly what is happening here.
Author's Response: I thought it was a little confusing, but couldn't think of a way to make it less so, without spoiling the mood of the poem by saying it outright.
Oh, Catrin! I loved it! The way you wrote it was so wonderfully unique and creative. I really like the title you chose, too. It was just so powerful... Great job!
Wow, Catrin. That was......strong. All I'm left with right now is a feeling of wanting to help somebody.
I like the structure and flow of the poem. Well Done.
Author's Response: Thank You! I wasn't too sure everyone would get what was going on, but anyway, I'm glad you liked it.