This is a really great poem! I usually write long reviews, but other reviewers seem to have taken care of that, so I'm just going to say this is a very very good poem!
Wow, I really liked it!
Normally I'm not so into poetry, but as I needed a love poem for school... I just thought, why don't I pay a visit to MNFF's poetry page? That way I will make it less boring (I can't think of a better word).
If I read poetry, and I have some over the years, I really like it to flow, and have a good rhythm. That way it makes it easy and more fun to read. I really liked that in your poem. The rhythm and structure that it has, it just appeals to me. Also, the repetition throughout the stanzas made it sound good, that's just what I like, I guess. But it is not constant, which made it different and surprising, fun and living.
And not to forget the overall story. Most people would like to do one of the things youíve listed here, but James doesnít care about any of it, and just wants to be with Lily, which, to me, is true love. To give everything up for that person and to be wherever he or she is.
So, good job, well done! And, if you donít mind, Iíll be using it in my class (crediting you of course).
This was the absolute sweetest poem I have ever read. Your summary gave me no hint to the overall feeling I would encounter here. The first stanza blew me away, and I wished for a moment I had a nice and poetic boyfriend (no such a thing exists, though; any girl should know that).
Only thing that I had a problem with is you mentioned cold and fires twice in two different stanzas. It's nearly the same two lines and I thought I was reading the same thing. It's not a big problem, but can be changed.
Every poem has been fantastic. I'm putting you on my Favorite Author's list.
Author's Response: Yay, favourite author list! Thank you for the review, immortal. About the repeating of cold and fire, originally I had both verses exactly the same. I decided to change the last one a bit because I didn't really want it straight repeating. Methinks, though, that I should have just redid the entire verse instead of keeping the same idea in both of them. Anyways, thanks again for the review, I should have more poems up soon enough.