OHH, SHOOT! I forgot to mention Erik's cronies. Lane and Laurie. :D I like how Lane keeps making observations and Laurie keeps whacking him because he doesn't know how else to respond to intellectual remarks.
OK, I'm done now.
Author's Response: I'm so happy you liked them! They were inspired by the pirate duo from PotC, with better hygiene, and no glass eyes. :D
I applaud your excellence!!! *clapclapclap*
as usual, you have cuddly animagi, nighttime excursions, mythology, outrageous behavior in the library...all the best qualities of a Kerichi story. and then there's a sequel. as usual.
Severus is very well written in this. snarky, sarcastic, cunning, scheming, calculating... basically everything that makes a good Slytherin.
I definitely like Tom. Curse-happy matchmakers are way too much fun. but he does let things get too far out of hand before doing anything about them.
I also like Dani, she's funny. In the bookshop, when they're discussing what she does if she meets a stranger, "What if they say they're an Auror, and that they're a friend of the family, or that I'm hurt and you need to go with them?", "Then I hex them and run screaming to find you." and then she uses it as an excuse to hex Narcissa! I was laughing my head off.
a marvelous piece of work, excellently presented, beautifully written, and leaves the reader hungry for more. lol, do I sound like a critic? better criticize then...
Sirius. not very well done. I understand that since he is not the main character, you don't put as much work into him, but still, he seems like just another face. and his hatred of Snape seems rather redundant, like, why can't he just get over it and ignore him? this has always given me cause for thought, why did James and Sirius hate Severus so much? what has he done to them, that they HAVEN'T provoked? or is he just some Slytherin oddball that they decided to curse for fun?
Bellatrix. she seems a little ooc to me. usually she's more fanatical about serving Voldemort than seducing men. that might or might not be true, that is just my experience of her.
well, that's all I can think of to criticize right now, so...GREAT JOB KERICHI!!! :D
Author's Response: An articulate guy. Somewhere, out there, a present or future girlfriend is sighing happily...until you talk rings around her, and then you will either get snogged or smacked into silence, LOL.
Thanks for the compliments and the concrit too. Sirius in this fic has a role much like Snape in the 'Semi Charmed Life' story. Someone loathed, who by seventh year is avoided. I don't see Sirius as a Harry, running around saying 'Snape is up to something!' all the time, heh. As for Bella, her characterization in the books pre-Azkaban is only mentions of what she's done, not what she's like. She does use the baby talk to irritate in canon, but I enjoyed making her a femme fatale who doesn't get her man. :)
I'll miss Jugson and "Laurie" too! :D It seems Tom has gotten a bit less creepy, but still... you wrote him brilliantly, very much an original character, even if he is canon, :). He's scary, but you pulled it off, if that makes sense. And I'm so glad Severus and Eris will be together now! Though I wonder how the whole "Knights" thing will progress... and the apprenticeship! I can't wait to read the sequel!
Author's Response: Tom is definitely the kind Severus would rather have as a friend than an enemy! Thank you for missing the cronies, and double thanks for wanting to read the sequel! :)
Rumors and entrancement spells... :D I'm so glad Severus has accepted Eris back and I hope Tom lifts that spell on Lily!! But this is still an evil, evil cliffie. I must read on...
Author's Response: Aren't you glad you didn't have to wait for the next chapter to post? :D
I was hoping it wouldn't be like this... But I have confidence that she will be able to explain. Hopefully... What a cliffie! This chapter was brilliant, though! I love the beginning! I don't expect Severus would appreciate the fact that I was giggling like mad throughout his little tour, but perhaps you would, :D. I must find out what happens next, now...
Author's Response: He was definitely channelling a Sherrif of Nottingham storming through the castle attitude. :D Yay for you giggling like mad!
I hope he gets over that. As if everything is an attack on his person and an insult to his circumstances.
Great chapter, though! Severus' reaction (if unfounded!) was realistic and Dani was very cute! I love that her boyfriend kisses "with his lips closed"! :D And that she used to like Severus. :)
I hope Severus and Eris can come out in the open about their relationship though, and I'm very glad his mother approves! I can't wait to read about their tea session!
Author's Response: When you're little, kissing with lips closed earns a boy brownie points. When you're older, it earns him a 'Dear John' letter, heehee.
Skills... :D That made me think of Napoleon Dynamite... Anyway... great chapter, of course. It's awful that Eris' family would marry her off to Rabastan Lestrange... ick! But I enjoyed seeing Luciif/Luci and Narcissa! :D And I wonder how she's going to break the news about "Epis" to Severus! Plus... I hope Claire/Tom works out. Maybe she can make him less... creepy. Valentines Day was sweet! :)
Author's Response: Girls like a bloke with skills. Potions skills, spell-invention skills, sneering skills, and don't forget snogging skills! :D
Lol! Severus just can't accept Eris "Hufflepuff side", can he? :D This chapter had it all! Sweet Christmas presents, Epis being helpful (LOL!) and dark dreams of creepy psychos. I'm not sure I understand how Severus knew the dream (did Voldemort give it to him on purpose?) but it was definitely scary and very realistic. And I'm glad James enjoyed his date with Lily! :)
Author's Response: Severus 'took' the dream. He learned it from Tyr during their conversation about the differences between 'Vald' and Legilimency.
I'm glad you like the James/Lily subplot. I know a lot of OFC writers make the poor girl suffer through a love triangle with one or more of the Marauders, heh, but Severus is all she wants or needs! :D
Author's Response: Shebeing Eris, not Lily, LOL.
A Knight of Walpurgis now, huh. :D The description of his initiation was great! So was the party, though in a very different way, :D! I can't wait to see how all of this continues... I hope Severus realizes his mistake... Anyway, great chapter!
Author's Response: Have I mentioned that I keep the story 'canon' while slipping through the cracks (what people don't know can't be in the books. :D) to create a romance?
Sort of overreacting, I'd say. Not that Severus was being very tactful... and yet, it shows how much he cares, doesn't it? :D As usual, this was a brilliant chapter! I really like seeing all the purebloods... really great how some always kind of amuse with their stupidity and arrogance while others really make you feel that chill... And have I mentioned that Eris is a really cool OC? :D
Author's Response: I never get tired of hearing it. :D I hope when you read the next chap you change your mind about 'overreacting!' ;)
Awww. Even though this chapter revealed some... darker aspects of Eris'... messed-up... family, that last scene was soooo sweet! I love when you have Severus act - as he would say - Hufflepuff. Of course, it'd be weird if he were always like that, but once in a while it's very cute and even IC! :D
Author's Response: Like you said- every once in awhile, because everyone has all aspects of the Houses within them, some are just WAY more prominent than others! :D
Awww. I'm glad Eris isn't mad at him for the Malfoy thing. And I hope Malfoy doesn't find out any more! The Bellatrix bit was really funny, especially Eris' reaction! LOL! And the description at the beginning was great! It's so obvious to the reader that it's no mere cat, but it's also obvious to the reader why Severus would fall for it! :)
Author's Response: Bella is a character I happily eviscerate in fiction! LOL. Severus won't be happy about falling for it when he discovers the truth, though.
How do you manage to have a serious tone and then suddenly throw humor in and make it work? :D I loved the invisible car scene! That was hilarious, and I grin at Narcissa's humor every time! Plus, "Epis" is always a laugh! :D I really enjoyed this chapter, it's great to see the plot unfold so precisely and yet be so unforced!
Author's Response: Thank you! You know the type who gets stern looks for whispering comments in school, church, or at funerals? That's me. :D
All is coming to light now, isn't it, and just as new mysteries are introduced! :D It's great how you throw the suspense in - I'm dying to find out what exactly Eris was doing in Wales! - so casually.
And Tom is... a major creep... Just had to say that. :D Great chapter!
Author's Response: Tom is creepy, and yet I can't help liking him. :D
You, of course, I love, for being so fab! :)
I really liked the 'Dia de los Muertos' part and may I say buen echo -well done
Author's Response: Gracias! Eres muy amable. :)
Aw. It's so funny how the relationship between Eris and Severus is so different and yet (oddly, I wonder why...:D) similar to his relationship with the cat.
I love Eris giving him a taste of his own medicine though and I can't wait to see how this continues!
Author's Response: In the future, there are a few times when she reminds him of her cat, heh. He won't remember that with a smile when he eventually finds out!
Ewww! Poor Severus... kissing Bella... At least this kiss was MUCH more enjoyable... even if he does have to suffer the icy water as a consequence. :D
Plus, I think Tom is growing on me. Even if he's a really creepy guy to be around... Anyway... great chapter! I'll go read the next one now...
Author's Response: Tom is like mold. He grew on me too, so much that he's in the sequel and the one shot after that too!
i have indeed enjoyed reading about the characters in this chapter lol good writting skills
Author's Response: You have awe-inspiring reviewing skills. (to go along with bow-hunting skills and computer hacking skills perchance?)
It's nice to see Severus acting like a normal, not too angsty teenage boy! I hope he gets the girl! :D And I can't wait to find out what the mysterious plan is... Plus, Eris is fun! I love Claire and Narcissa, especially - a whole new spin on her character and Claire is a fun OC; a different perspective of the cliché snobby pureblood. Brilliant!
Author's Response: Narcissa has so few 'walk on' moments in the book, her characterization can vary wildly and still be believable. Thanks for liking her in this story, and snobby purebloods who are more than that.
Aw. Dani is such a sweet kid! Maybe a little Hufflepuff... but only a little! Tom is such a creepy character! And the whole thing with him and Sutton and Erik was very... interesting... Poor Severus and Eris... I would hate to find my brother like that... or to know that my brother was a royal arse... But either way, great chapter!
Author's Response: Even when they're a royal arse, girls still love their brothers! :) Tom is very Machiavellian. Severus is glad his roommate considers him a friend and not an enemy!