Oh. My. Gosh. Amazing.
This is one of my favorite fics. I'll add in onto my favorites after I finish this review. I love the way that you've used the element of the war (and an element of the war that we haven't been able to see first hand yet: Inferi) to let the two characters realize their love for each other. I was crying at the end, and it was heart touching.
The only things that I would mention are that unless Ernie was really, really, really, really in love with the person he wanted to protect and he knew it, I don't see him doing all the "pushing-Hannah-into-the-study-while-he-fights". He just seems too easygoing for that. But, then, that's just me, and it's still an amazing story in it's own.
Again, this is just amazing,
Tears are prickling my eyes!! :'[
This is so...damn! it's beautiful! I saw it on Ravenclawhero's faves, and i'm so glad she put it there. so sad, just my style.
I was searching for stories featuring at least one Hufflepuff student for the SBBC when I stumbled over your story. It engaged me immediately and didnít let me go until the end, when it left me breathless and heartbroken all at the same time.
I really like how you switched between Hannah, Ernie and the Death Eaters throughout the story. It makes this feeling of running out of time more pronounced and lets it dominate the atmosphere of the whole story. Hannah and Ernie were the perfect couple for this storyline. I could easily imagine Hermione and Ron in a similar situation, but I think using those two wouldnít have done the storyline justice. Plus, itís nice to see some Hufflepuffs being important and doing something to help the school for a change, they are vastly underrepresented in fanfiction.
When Yaxley mentioned the Inferi for the first time, my heart nearly stopped. I didnít think the teachers could stand a chance against a whole army of Inferi and I was sure Hogwarts was doomed. Especially since you had mentioned before that the new defences werenít fully in place yet. The protection spell, that makes Inferi burst into flame as soon as they enter Hogwarts was very well thought out, it shows that Harry shared his and Dumbledoreís experiences in the cave with McGonagall, or she probably wouldnít have thought to put such a spell on the school, because she didnít even know that Voldemort had Inferi at his disposal. Very nice way of working that part of HBP into the story, if only indirectly.
Hannah and Ernie were very nicely characterised. There was enough in there for us to recognise them, but you also took them and developed them a bit, seeing as you needed to make them seventh years. I found it adorable that Hannah still wears her hair in pigtails like she did when she was in first year. Ernieís wish to fight and prove himself to Hannah and to the teachers was exactly what I would have Ernie expected to want to do. Hannahís concern and worry were very nice as well. Hannah in particularly displayed the Hufflepuff trait of loyalty, when she defended Ernie against Adney in the end and then died for him. She also displayed bravery, that isnít usually associated with Hufflepuffs, but that I have always thought closely associated with loyalty.
One thing I noticed that made me pause were these lines: Hannah hadnít been in Dumbledoreís office since he died. It was still the same circular structure, but the unusual objects and items were gone. I know that we havenít heard a lot about the Hufflepuffs in the books, but I canít imagine Hannah having been to Dumbledoreís office while he was headmaster. As far as I always understood it, not even the prefects, the Head Boy and the Head Girl have been to the office and it is highly unusual for Harry to have been there not once but several times. I might be wrong, but I find it highly unlikely that every prefect should have been in the headmasterís office, so Hannah wouldnít know the differences between now and before. I realise that you were trying to show the differences between McGonagall and Dumbledore as expressed in the different ways they furnish and decorate their offices, and I liked the way you did it, I just donít think Hannah would notice these differences.
Now, the ending, that just broke my heart! Finally they have the courage to admit their love to each other and then Hannah dies! Itís sad, but in a way itís perfect for this story. I fell in love with Hannah and Ernie while reading and I would have loved to see them happy and together in the end, but this way the ending was much more emotional for me, itís tragic and that makes it all the more moving than it would have been if you had put in a happy ending.
This story simply doesnít give you the chance to not feel and I loved it for this in particular, but for lots of other reasons as well. Lovely!
Author's Response: Thanks for such a long and lovely review! I'm glad you enjoyed it.
Wow. This is incredible. Quite a tear-jerker at the end, if you ask me. I don't read many Ernie/Hannah fics, and this one was sweet in its own special way. And yet dreadfully terrible. You had a fantastic mix of the two, making this story unbelievably emotional.
It was so painful to read the last few parts, knowing that Hannah was fighting to the death, just for Ernie, even though she didn't have to die. It was sad that she couldn't mutter out the last bit of her "I love you" to Ernie. But it created a very powerful message, and I think it was perfect for the story.
The only thing I found questionable is whenever the two Death Eaters put the "Silencio" spell on Ernie, he starts talking a while later because the spell was wearing off. I didn't think that it could wear off, and only would cease to work when the countercurse was muttered, but maybe I'm just imagining things. =]
Great story; I enjoyed this one to no end. Keep up the superb work!
i liked that you used your own charectors for the most part
omg i was in tears by the end! I loved it! an absolutely wonderful story!
That was the most amazing story I've ever read. Wow. I'm practically speechless. I'm practically in tears. 1000/10
Author's Response: Wow! You managed to review virtually all my fics! *is surprised* Thanks for taking the time to read them all!
I was nearly in tears by the end of it *clutches onto tissue* Well done for a being a finalist, your story certainly deserved it!
Well, I wanted to see why your story beat mine, and NOW I KNOW!!!!! That was amazing. I am a 14 year old boy who does not like hufflpuffs that much, and I was in tears at the end. You discription was superb, and your character's were very well writtin (if that makes sens). It was an houner to lose to you! You get a full 10!
Wow Air Elemental!!! This was very beautiful! I almost cried at the end. It was very tastefully written; it has a lot of beautiful descriptions. Congratulations it was an honour to be a finalist with your story.
Author's Response: Thanks Purplemage! Congratulations on winning!