okay i found one mistake i pretty sure the prof. would have said Miss. Granger Ms. is said to someone who is widowed.
I've been checking almost everyday for updates :) Please do it soon!
I love this story so far. It's one of the best.
Gr... Where do you people get all your ideas from? I'm SO jealoused! Great fiction on top of all. Update soon, I can't wait to see where this is leading... Maybe Hermione can jibe Lucius about Draco? I dunno... lol
Severus was so... what's the word? not cute, not really sweet, but more endearing and honest than I usually see him. It was a good chapter, and I like how Remus doesn't just lie down and agree with everything Hermione says or just stand in awe of everything about her- he's his own person. Sometimes I get the feeling from other fics that he's kind of wishy-washy, but you write him very well.
I am a hugw fan of this story, and I'm so glad that it finally updated. One thing has consistantly bugged me, though. In amost every single chapter of this fic, I have noticed several awkwardly worded sentences, missing words and general grammar mishaps. For instance:
[He wasn't sure if the news would please his master or just piss him of more than he already is.] The last [is] should be changed to [was] because the sentence is in the past tense.
Another thing that i noticed was this:
["You'll never live up to him," Hermione whispered as she turned and walked away from Severus. She didn't want to see 'her' or talk to him for a long time. ] The 'her' in parenthesis should be changed to 'him' to prevent from calling Snape a girl.
There were a few more errors in this and previous chapters, but there's nothing in there that couldn't be fixed with a Beta scanning it over, or if you already have a Beta, yet another set of eyes. While these mistakes are minor, they have been plaguing this story for quite some time, and it has gotten to a point where I can keep my scilence no longer.
I hope for a quick update, and maybe some improvements in grammar next time. :)
I read this the other day, but didn't have time to review. I am also a senior (Go Class of '07!), and senior year is kicking my ***, too. I liked this chapter. It's cute that Remus is so worried about Hermione. I'd write more, but I have to go study.
dont feel bad about this chapter... i enjoyed it actually, especially the beginning, it hooked me right in! please update soon! 10/10
i just found your story and read it all at once... i love it! keep up the great work and i cant wait to see what happens next!!
Author's Response: Thank You so much!!!
OMG I LOVE THIS STORY. I HOPE HERMIONE WILL BE COMING BACK SOMETIME. IF SHE DOES THEN DOES THAT MEAN THAT HER AND RAMUS WILL BE TOGETHER? O WELL, I GUESS WE'LL FIND OUT. I CAN'T WAIT THOUGH!!!!!!!
Author's Response: Thank You for your review!!!! And trust me you will see!!!!
what the heck is up with all the SHUCKs? it's SHOOK for goodness' sake!!!!!!
Author's Response: Sry!!!! ^_^
This is my favorite chapter! I also liked the part where Hermione and Remus kissed.. I really loved it, its so very touching. Keep up the good work!!
Author's Response: Thanx so very very much!!!!!!!!!
this story made me cry. Siriusly.
Author's Response: I'm sorry it made u cry.....psych....i'm glad it had such an impact on you...that means i'm doing my job....thanx for the review...^_^
First of all, I really liked your story, so please excuse my grammar/spelling issues and know that you did a great job!
I think "I can barley" should be "I can barely", although you could've been talking about crops...
Also "emerged" in a chess game should be "immersed".
"Hansom" should be "handsome".
Author's Response: Thank You....and i'm glad you told me, because as many times as i go over my own work....i never catch my mistakes. Thanks again
lmfao!!!...oh jeeeeeeesus!! lord almight!!! i have not laughed that hard a fic before in my life...great...job *laughs her head off*...ooooooo....*wipes away a tear*...i'm good...great job again i am looking foward to more
hmmm interesting indeed....severus?..hermione?...last to see her before she went missing?...oh i'm sorry that was just some verbal diarria...hahah...love that ...anyways...this is getting juicy and quick.....can't wait to read more!!!
oh my...i think that this has got to be my most favorite chapter so far...*tear* that was just soooooo sweet good job!! ^_^
WHOOT FOR APOLOGIZING TO LUPIN!!!!!
James seems like a bit of a jerk in the beginning :) haha! whoot for lupin and intelligence!!!!! Rock on!!!
*cries* poor hermione!!! I hate him I hate him I hate him!!!!