This was so beautifully written. You did a wonderful job of showing how music is the voice of the soul. I love how this took place in the Muggle world. It really emphasized the fact that magic exists in this world, too; we just use musical instruments instead of wands.
Oh my God. This story is just so beautiful, I can't even express it properly. If I were one to cry at stories, I think I would have cried at the end. Very feelingly written, and very moving.
I liked this very much so.
Still very good.
You wrote this at midnight?
It sounds frikken great!
Lovely. The entire story is like the song - sadness permeates it but smiles move it along, and it ended in glowing hope. Beautiful!
Author's Response: That's one of the loveliest comments I've received. Many thanks. :)
I really like your style of writing. Your descriptions create beautiful images and characterization, and the use of 'he' and 'she' throughout the chapter make it seem even more beautiful and romantic. Just one nit-pick:
for his for his touch was sure and the notes resonant.
You accidentaly repeated 'for his'. But great job!
Author's Response: Thank you very much. :) You have a sharp eye - I'll edit that out when I get the chance.
I play the violin, and I would much prefer Remus as my teacher then my present one!
For some reason, I figured Ginny or Luna s a violin plyer, but Hermione fits as well!
Author's Response: I hope you find a Remus of your own! Isn't it fun to relate characters to such things? ^^
Wow. That was so lovely. I can see why you won for this story. You completely deserved it. It was so well-written and very serene. The tone of the piece was consistent, and I loved the slight detachment you took from the characters - always 'he' and 'she.' I also liked how you interpreted the HP world to Muggle, but didn't burden us with overinformation (ie - what Lupin's disease was.)
Author's Response: Thanks so much, Charisma. I'm awfully late responding to you, so I apologize (in the off-chance that you ever read this). But I really appreciate new feedback, as the fic gets older! It's freshening. =)
When I saw the title of this story, I knew I had to read it. And it did not disappoint me in the least. It is beautifully written, and I love that Lupin is the teacher...it fits him perfectly. Perhaps it seems a little out of character to some that Hermione is so musical in this story, but I enjoyed this portrayal of her immensely. Well done!!
Author's Response: Thank you so much! This story kind of banks on characterization, so I'm glad I didn't disappoint you there. Hermione IS a bit of a stretch, isn't she? But with music equating to magic I thought - what the heck, we'll make her extremely talented! =D I'm glad you enjoyed it! =)
I must say that you are an amazing writer. You are skilled with words and you have a strong vocabulary. The emotions and characterizations of people were amazing. You added little bits of other characters in there too, which added a little touch.
This was absolutely fantastic! I'm not surprised it won the QSQ.
Great job -- I'm sure you'll go far in writing.
Author's Response: Thank you so much, Winged Artemis, for the vote of confidence as much as the review. I've read some of your work, too, and not without admiration - and because I think you'll go far, as well, I feel doubly gratified to receive these words from you! :)
That was beautiful. I swear, I was starting to tear up. Now I want nothing more than to go find my cousin and ask her to teach me to play the violin. This story was amazing. I am awed.
Author's Response: Yes, find her!! For violins are such happy things. ^^; And seriously, thank you so much. It means very much to me - and saying that over and over doesn't lessen its spirit. =)
[p.s. I <3 Moony, too! =P]
Good grief, you are incredible. You have the most flowery and fluid writing I've seen from the unpublished- and especially in fan fiction! You are a truly incredible author, and I can't wait to see more from you.
Author's Response: Thank you so much, Celebwen!! I don't really know how to respond to such a comment because it's too kind to feel like I deserve it. I hope to someday, though, and I won't forget this! =)
You have a lovely writing style. This is very beautifully done and I can't wait to keep reading!
Author's Response: Thank you, Celebwen! I'm happy to think you're enjoying it because your comment brightened my day. =)
You have done a phenomenal job with this story. The writing is lyrical and the imagry a beautiful and timeless melencholy. I really cannot express how much I enjoyed this piece.
I liked the way you described the mauraders briefly as a quartet with Lily binding them together, and I almost wanted more of that. Were they a musical quartet? Tell us how Sirius fingers danced on the viola, or James's strong rythem underlay his cello. And I wanted to know more about Lily, their flower. Was she the aria that bound them together?
You kept the ending of this piece very pensive and touching. In a way I'm glad that Hermione missed Remus. You build such a powerful story that making everything turn out allright in the end by sticking on a bright pink bandage just wouldn't have fit with life as it is or the story you are trying to tell. My favorite line was "Her little cup of happiness was full, and for once she felt at home in the vista stretching radiantly before her. " It is just the right note of optimism.
Have you considered re-writing this somewhat and trying to submit it for publication as a short story? I think you would have a shot...
Anyway, brava again!
Author's Response: My dear fellow 'Puff, thank you immensely!! I'm kind of mortified to have inadvertently made you read the whole shebang instead of a chapter, but very gratified that you did!
You're the first person to mention the quartet - I'm so glad you liked that! As you guessed, they were a musical quartet and Lily was their song; it seems to fit for them in this realm. =) If I do get around to a revision, I'd love nothing more than to linger on that. =) I'm also glad you liked the "bittersweet" ending; I've thought of making it happier somehow, but it's that storytelling toss-up between pink bandages and words of consolation... I'm sure you know the feeling!
Thanks! I've never really considered it, I guess because it's so tied to HP in my head; but it's certainly the closest thing to a short story I've ever done, and it'd give me interesting perspective.
Anyway, thanks again and see you around! =)
this is story is far beyond fan fiction.
it's a masterpiece within itself.
it was a pleasure to read.
Author's Response: Thank you for reading!
It's responses like these that make writing even more of a pleasure. =)
OH! And i forgot something AGAIN! It's amazing how forgetful I can be when I love a piece of fiction =)
If it's not to bold, would you mind telling us all your real name, so that when you eventually do get something published, (and believe me, you WILL) we can go out and buy it? Don't worry, I'm not some crazy psycho stalker person haha.
Author's Response: I have to say a big Thank-you again for all of these lovely reviews; they've been a lot of fun!! And that's one of the nicest, most encouraging responses anyone's ever left. I'm Ana-Maria - I'm a bit leery of putting my full name - not because of you, because the internet's so huge - but I'll tell you what? If I ever get published, I'll track down every person like you and thank you personally for helping me in part on my way there. =D
So I forgot to mention two things and I also just read through some of your other reviews haha =)
Your writing style almost reminds me of modern-day Shakespearean. I absolutely adore Shakespeare, so it's a huge compliment!
One of the other reviews I read talked about your use of narrative versus dialogue, and suggested you use less narrative and write more conversation. I disagree. I feel that narrative is definately your strong point and that if you change the dialogue more into a narrative of what the said (even though it is very much like this already) it would make your writing even stronger.
Oh -- and I play the flute for a well-known symphony, so anything relating to music is definately an eye-catcher for me =)
Author's Response: *bowled over* Shakespeare is the KING. =D Gosh, I'd be happy with one millionth of his talent!! You know, that's a really great suggestion and I've been thinking along those lines... I really want to elaborate some things in this story and I think that so as not to disrupt the flow of what I've already written, it might be a good idea to just incorporate some narrative dialogue. Thanks for the feedback! That is so awesome! You know, I've said this before, but I think the best thing about this story, for me, has been having reviews from musicians! You all are the best. =)