Wow, that is really interesting.... I really liked it. I wish Snape didn't have to die. I am still hoping for a reprisal from Snape in book 7. Maybe I create one in my own story (just in case that doesn't happen)....
I liked it. It was really slow, and not rushed through. Though I can't imagine Snape openly regretting what he had done to Dumbledore, maybe the death changed him. I like your portrayal of Jaems, and how he had felt sorry about Snape's childhood. You did a great job of him. Onto how Lily had befriended Snape, it was neat. The reason for her liking someone who had called her a Mudblood was really nice. And the end was really strong and touching. Your writing style helps me relate with everything that takes place. Very good. 10/10
I liked the fiction. But I think you were bit too direct. I doubt that James Potter, after bringing himself to apologize to "Snivellus" would also be able to say that he forgve him aloud. It should be understood, but I would have preferred if they didn't say it directly. What else? I liked your portrayal of James, but I doubt Snape would be so openly regretful except about Dumbledore's death and Lily's death. Harry and James were two people he did not like, and I don't think that he would totally be honest with himself about that. I think he would pretend that Harry and James meant nothing, but that would change after James forgave him. Overall really good job! :)
Author's Response: Excellent criticism, seriously I appreciate it. Next time I write something along these lines i'll try to show more subtlety...you know how it is when you get all excited about an idea, sometimes you miss the forest for the trees. ;) Thanks for reading! I appreciate it!