Ah dear Secret Keeper. Again. You did it again. You brilliant wonderful talented soul! There is such emotion in this chapter that I’m sitting here with my throat so tight I can barely swallow. I loved every word.
This sentence – “Muttered demands, incoherent whispers, sinister scoffs, melted into the void that was sound.” – It’s perfect. When Harry cupped Hermione’s face in the midst of the battle it was so powerful, almost more so than when they were desperately searching each other’s injuries. It’s that gift of subtlety that you have that writes more into your stories than words ever could. And when Harry “paused a moment longer to take one final look at his best friend, before the worry morphed into nausea and he had to turn away”…that’s when I think I lost it. And I’d be remiss if I didn’t add that your flair for comic relief is truly inspired! I just love what you do with Ginny’s hair. No one can whip it around corners like she can!
You know, I could spend a very long time filling up a page of exactly why this is perhaps my favorite chapter so far (do I say that each time?), but the fact is, that as a whole, this chapter worked a magic on me. It showcases your talents admirably and you should be very proud of it! Thank you for keeping this story going. I can’t wait for the next installment!
Author's Response: Suz, you could bring tears to my eyes with your reviews! Every time I read your input on my chapters, I have the sudden urge to dedicate the entire story to you. Indeed, it wouldn't be too far off the mark, as you really, truly keep me inspired to write more. I know I say that as a general reply to all reviews, but it holds truest for you. Some part of me is always wondering what it is you'll think of a particular like while I'm writing it. :) It's so good to know I haven't let you down yet. I get increasingly nervous about all my stories, the further into them I get, but you make up for my lack of confidence. Thank you for pointing out specifics, for being so sincere, and for making me proud of this story. I have no doubts that by the time it's finished, you'll have another chapter in your name-- I only wish I could do more. :)
I read it again and I still LOVE it!!! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE UPDATE SOON!!!!!!!
very, very good story. in fact, do you think you could update me everytime there's a new chapter? email@example.com good job even if you don't do that.
OMG! THIS FIC IS AWESOME! I've just read all seven chapters at once, and I'm craving for more! Please hurry and update! I feel real sorrow for Harry, having to made that tough decision as to whether or not to become the next Horcrux in order to save Ron....I definitely would not want to be in his place. Once again you're able to convey deep emotions perfectly! And your fic is well-written to boot, with a flowing plotline. Update, update! 10/10
Looking around frantically, he recognized that only he was out in the open, on he was visible. I think you forget the not for “not only was he out in the open” and I am not sure what you meant with the other part about “on he was visible”. I am sure it was just a small typo.
Unsheathing his wand with vehement force, Didn’t he just use it to keep Hermione back? So wouldn’t it already have been drawn? Sorry for the nit picks.
until his body lifted high into the air and began twirling grotesquely like a spiraling football. I don’t think Harry would say like a football. Maybe use something more magic related.
When Hermione wakes up, she means that SHE is the one that Harry would miss the most. More than Ron, correct? Is that what the dream meant? *squee* You have one happy delusional reader here.
I was not expecting you to get into the main action or the meat of the story quite so soon, but I am glad you did, this is great stuff! I loved how you finished it off. Just that one final word. So final. So awful and sentencing.
I can’t wait to read more of this. I am so glad you updated. It is one of my favorite fics around here. I really enjoy it. Keep up the good work!
I just read all seven chapters, and all I can say is OMGOMGOMG!!! This story is so great! The plot itself is so well thought out, and I can't even begin to describe your writing. You belong somewhere else than a fanfiction-site! Absolutely no spelling or grammar errors, and the most wonderful thing is your way of describing sceneries, characters and feelings. I love it! This story is simply brilliant! Just the right amount of H/Hr, although it was quite wierd that thing in chapter 6...I was so sure he was going to kiss her! ;P And Ginny... she's all desperate, she's so annoying! And the Horcrux thing, and the evil cliffie.. =O Why does Harry always have to be the hero? Ever since the beginning of this story I've been hoping that he'll give up on Ron and search for Horcruxes with Hermione instead! =P I just knew it was a trap, I knew it! I bet Harry will kill himself after defeating Voldemort...that would be so sad... but I bet you'll think of a way to end it so all us fans are satisfied =) I should probably stop rambling now. This is such an excellent story, and you're an excellent writer, so I hope you'll update soon *crosses fingers* 'Cause I can't wait much longer! =P Take all the stars in the sky, you deserve them all!
:o Ohemgee, that was a horrible cliffhanger to leave us at!! Harry CAN'T give up his soul!!! Anyways 10/10 this story is amazing and I've always been a H/Hr shipper but this is the first quality fic I've found so far. Barbara
This story is by far the best that I have read! I would have to agree with the other person who reviewed the story before me. I feel like I am reading something from JK. Your story is so amazing! I can't wait to read more.
Correction, She*, sorry about that Sadie.
Hey, good story. Read all the chapters before reviewing. I've read a story thats kind of oppisote to this.... Harry and Hermione were going out, then Harry went missing for a long time and Ron got with Hermione. But that seemed REALLY fucked up to me cause Ron and Hermione were being a bitch to Harry. But in the end Hermione dumps Ron and goes for Harry. I'm waiting to see how Ron takes the news when he finds out Harry is in love with Hermione ^_^. I bet Harry has an ace up his sleeve, I'm not worried. And to IluvDanRad4ever...... Do you have any common sense? It's the 7th chapter in, how could we lose Harry so quickly? Lol.. And why would he move it to General Fics? Most romancww fics take a while for it to kick in, well most good ones anyway. Keep writing and update ASAP 10/10,
P.S. I love A7X also :P
*screams until all breath has run out* *chokegulpcoughsigh* I cannot believe you had a new chapter up and I just see it now. *cry*
Well, there really isn't much I can say that I haven't said before, in terms of writing skills, grammar, all that stuff. Just absolutely flawless. I adore your descriptions--I especially liked youre very first sentence, sort of foreshadowing what is to come later on the chapter. The battle was described very nicely as well.
From beginning to end, it was filled with so many different emotions, so that one moment I'm going "aww, how sweet", the next I'm laughing, then my heart is in my hands, and by the end I'm nearly in tears. Wonderful!
Now, about the theory. I had heard the one where Harry is already a Horcrux and I actually really like it, although that sort of means that he inevitably will have to kill himself, or that someone will have to kill him. *tear* I really like the spin you put to it--it's always nice to have moderated theories in fics. I just hope against hope that with your superb writing skills and your briliant mind you will find a way around the "Harry-dying-thing". Although tragedies are really beautiful, this would work out much better with a happy Harry and Hermione.
As for the H/Hr in the story, it's perfect, don't worry about it. After all, you need to make it natural and sort of set it up, a thing you've been doing great at.
To end this, just know that I adore everything about this fic and I really hope that for that cliffie, you'll make it up to us by writing a very nice, long chapter, filled with ... everything! Rating-10+. Keep it up!
You write the characters really well; Bellatrix Lestrange couldn't have been more perfect! Keep it up!
i came back and reread it (because it's so freakin' awesome) and i have to say, you do J.K. better than J.K. herself. REALLY YOU DO. you should write a book... you should write book 7. redeem the harry potter name after HBP... *shudders* EXCELLENT. BRILLIANT. LOSS OF WORDS. UPDATE SOOOOOON!!!!!!!!!!!
I apoligize for my last comment, i was just upset. I guess he HAS to do it now doesn't he... *Sighs* this story is so well written, I love it to death..I am sure you will think of some way Harry can get out of giving his soul up. Love this story Rating/10
OOHHH MMMMYYY GGOOSSH!!!!!!!!!!!! Harry can NOT give up his soul!!!!!!!He can't do that! Because then he would NEVER defeat Voldemort! I am very dissapointed that you would to that to Harry.This story should really be in the General Fics section, don't you think? I don't know. I still love this story, even if you want Voldemort to win.
Amazing, awesome, brillant, is there a word to describe this story? I think not, it is to amazing. This chapter was a little short, but besides that it was good. Excellent job SecretKeeper! Keep up the great work.
Bloody brillant That is exactly what this story is coming to be! Why didn't i read this story sooner? I didn't know about it until i saw it on everyone's favorite stories list (at the top may i add). J.K. work is not even THIS strong. The way you made out the fighting scene between HArry and Pettigrew-brillant! It was perfect! And OH MY GOD, the Harry/Hermione fight scene! *gasps* it was just perfect, nothing but perfect. It shows how truly connected they are. I hope we get some romance in later chapters, but i have no doubt in your writing Keep up the great work!
I love how you make this story so real. That is exactly like Hermione and exactly like Harry. There is absolutley no OOC in this story, and in a lot of the stories her on MNFF, there is so much OOC with Hermione and Harry. Harrry is portrayed as this "oh-so romantic guy" and Hermione is portrayed as a slut. Not in you story! And thats what i'm loving. No other story on MNFF can compare to this story.... Question, are the words before every chapter lyrics to an Anvege Sevenfold song? Sorry bit confused on that. Thank you for writing this story.
Are we sure this isn't J.K. writing this herself?? This is my favorite fanfic i have EVER read.Sorry i keep saying that but it is true. This is the most harry potter-like story i have read and i think that your veiws will probaly end up happening in the real book. Everyone Harry loves is being taken away. Point blank. This story is PERFECT! I praise your writing skills and ability's. Excellent, never stop writing, you are amazing Can i rate this story higher than a 10?
Oh my god. This is the BEST fanfic story i have ever read, and i am not just saying that. I love how you aren't like " Harry realizes his uttermost love for hermione" because that is how almost EVERY story is. Love it! Keep up the great work! This is almost better the J.K.'s work herself.