awww very cute! He was acting all funny for her.
that's very sweet, but the third to last line, she would be kissing him, not smiling even while she blushed in surprise. but other than that, very well done.
that's very sweet, but the third to last line, she would be kissing him, not smiling even while she blushed in surprise. but other than that, very well done.
hey its great but why did u stop, plz continue!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
can u plz compelete it ?
Author's Response: Thanks for your review. By the way, it IS completed! It's supposed to be a one-shot. :) Glad you enjoyed it anyway.
I loved it I think you should write a presequal about when Sirius dared James to ask her to marry him. It would be grate. It was relly well written and it was entirly how I thought it was when he asked her. Loved it!!!! :)
Author's Response: Thanks for your suggestion. I might write a prequel if I feel up to it, but no promises yet. :)
I could never see James that nervous, but that made it quite funny! I must admit, though, I find it kind of sad that James asked Lily to marry him because of a dare...oh well. Well done anyway!
Author's Response: Actually, James didn't do it only because of the dare. It was the dare that spurred him into action. I mentioned that in the 4th paragraph: "James was steeling himself to do something that he wanted to do very much even without being dared to, though he hadn’t actually done it yet." Just clarifying that. And thanks for your review!
An excellent well- written story which actually has a story line as well.now as usual there are two parts of my review over here what i liked- the story was weel written and has a basic plotline and i s an good story.It has good grammer as well. what i did not like- there is almost nothing different from all the othere stories out there. Your story seems cliched. But you do have potential.Keep writing!
An excellent well- written story which actually has a story line as well.now as usual there are two parts of my review over here what i liked- the story was weel written and has a basic plotline and i s an good story.It has good grammer as well. what i did not like- there is almost nothing different from all the othere stories out there. Your story seems cliched. But you do have potential.Keep writing!
Very cute! I cna't see James that nervous, it was funny!
AAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!! that was cute!
