MuggleNet Fan Fiction
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Reviews For Broken

Name: KenF (Signed) · Date: 09/19/05 8:21 · For: March 2013
I'm really starting to like Bill, and the fact that Harry was willing to tell him anything at all speaks volumes of their relationship. Unlike your previous stories, I haven't the foggiest idea where this one is going (yet), but that just makes the updates more fun.

Author's Response: Bill has become a friend and father figure to Harry without Harry realizing it. Where this story is going? We'll it is not an adventure story, that's for sure. I'm sure you will figure it out before too long.

Name: KenF (Signed) · Date: 09/19/05 8:04 · For: June 2008
Here we go again... I'm starting to like Bill already. Seems like the sort that sees a lot but doesn't pry.

Author's Response: You have Bill pegged. Probably know a "Bill" don't you.

Name: ginny_potter (Signed) · Date: 09/19/05 3:02 · For: March 2015
yet another great chapter. Ahhh Ginny has a child. How very interesting in deed. Will we find out whos the father or is that another loose end that we get to make up? Keep up the great work :)

Author's Response: Answers to questions about Ginny's daughter are coming in the next few chapters.

Name: WitchatHeart77 (Signed) · Date: 09/19/05 1:41 · For: March 2015
Is Bill a seer? He seems to know things. Anyway, Im liking it so far. Will keep checking back for updates. Very interesting!

Author's Response: Bill is a Muggle; kind of rules out him being a seer. But, Harry has shown him the magic world, and Bill is a very wise, fairly old man. He pays attention to things and logically puts them together. In my mind, I see him as a Muggle version of Dumbledore.

Name: tufgurl (Signed) · Date: 09/19/05 0:15 · For: March 2015
oops sorry, nother review, but i think u love gettin reviews dont u? well, wat happened to ron? i mewan, hes harrys bestfrend rite? ud think hes stay in touch wid him... love ur stories, especially the unlocked mind and the one b4 dat.. i find "broken" really interestin

Author's Response: Yes, I like reviews. Ron, you will get to see a little of him much later in the story. He does not have a very big part to play though.

Name: tufgurl (Signed) · Date: 09/19/05 0:11 · For: March 2015
i love ur stories.. i really like the chpter one nd two.. i ddnt get tthis chapter much but i read ur other two reviews, i ddnt see any mention in this chapter about ginny having a daughter.. aanyways, keep up the good work

Author's Response: First of all, I'm glad you like the story.

Second. People are guessing that Ginny has a daughter. They are makeing that correct guess from this exchange between Ginny and Bill.

“I have to go back in the middle of June, but I can return next September if that is all right with you,” she said.

“You can bring her here for the summer if you like. There are lots of kids for her to be with. And she can help out on the docks doing different odd jobs. Give her a chance to earn some pocket money,” Bill replied as they headed back down the stairs.

Name: elissamay (Signed) · Date: 09/18/05 20:44 · For: March 2015
hi, well i really like this story so far...alot lol anyway that whole daughter thing... whoa! was she always there?? well you sure got me with that one!

Author's Response: Glad you like it. Not sure what you mean about GInny's daughter always being there. But rest assured, answers about her are coming.

Name: potterfan62442 (Signed) · Date: 09/18/05 17:04 · For: March 2015
Wow that was weird. I summited a review for the last chapter. Then went back to the story and noticed that their was a third chapter that wasn't there before. Anyways I also liked this chapter a lot. I'm a bit confussed with the whole daughter thing. I doubt you'll tell me but I'll try anyways. Is Harry the father? Your a great writter. I liked how it was almost exactly like when Harry meets Bill when Ginny meets Bill. I don't know if that even makes sence, but I hope you know what I mean. This chapter was fantastic!!!!!!!!!! til next time -potterfan62442 or in the next couple of minutes if the next chapter is summited after I summit this review lol.

Author's Response: You will find out about Ginny's daughter in coming chapters. Yes, I understand exactly what you mean in the similarity of Harry and Ginny's first meetings with Bill. You should get the idea that he stops on a regular basis and picks people up on the road to the lodge. I see the lodge as being a meca of sorts for lost souls. Somehow they seem to end up there. Kind of makes sense, if you think about it. The lodge is the end of civilization. Beyond it, is nothing but wilderness. People running from the world would just somehow find their way to it.

Name: potterfan62442 (Signed) · Date: 09/18/05 16:51 · For: March 2013
I liked that chapter. I loved the parts when Bill would use british slang and Harry would tell him that he owed him a beer. I can't wait until the next chapter, and I'm starting to get impatient. I am really looking forward to finding out what happened between Harry and Ginny or at least some idea of it. I like the way you are writting this story it does make you use your imagination more. All in all I can't wait for your next chapter and I know you won't let your readers down. This is Brilliant!!!! til next time -potterfan62442

Author's Response: Well, I can't do much to get this posted faster than I am. So, you will have to be patient, sorry. A few clues, that is all you are going to get each chapter. And you are not going to get all the answers. Some things will be left to your imagination.

Name: mstiquerose (Signed) · Date: 09/18/05 13:02 · For: June 2008
Wow! This fanfic is really good! Great job! Hope you keep posting more soon!

Author's Response: Thank you.

Name: Harriet Evans (Anonymous) · Date: 09/18/05 5:58 · For: March 2013

I have been checking daily for this chapter to be up, so I think that tells you something, for starters. I wasn't disapointed; this chapter had the same easy, relaxed feel about it To me, you seem very comfortable with your writing in this story, and it reflects in the style and tone. Very good - nothing is laboured and I just want to keep reading.

I feel happy with Harry's character (apart from one little gripe - see later) it makes sense to me that he would run from the wizarding world (not because he is afraid), but because he wanted to be free of everything that had grieved him. I liked the interation between the two men; the trust between them came shining through. It was a very comfortable conversation - I liked the little jokes about English slang etc. Also enjoyed Harry's memory of Quidditch, via the 2x4!

If possible, I would have liked you to take a little longer over Harry telling his tale to Bill. He seemed to take evrything in his stride, so easily, and whilst I know that he obviously trusted Harry, I would have expected him to maybe need a break, before coming back and agreeing to let Harry tell him his tale. Similarly, rather than the narrator telling us Bill's reaction to Harry's story, I would have liked to see just a bit of his friend's wonder at what he was being told. Something like describing a game of Quidditch maybe? I could see Bill finding the rules very hard to grasp!

As I said, Harry seems very real to me, apart from where he describes himself as the '...most powerful wizard in the world.' I feel that Harry would be a little more modest - still acknowledging what he did, but in not quite such an upfront way? Still, I can see that it was important that Bill grasp just how special his friend actually was.

You have a tiny spelling mistake. "It’s a memory… a memory of an angle,” I think this should be ANGEL, Steve!

Anyway, I hope you will excuse my criticisms, which seem to have taken up rather a large section of the review. In reality they are completely outweighed by the quality of this story, which I am enjoying immensly. It is refreshingly different and very enjoyable to read. Good stuff, mate!

Author's Response: First of all, this is not a negative review. There is some very constructive stuff in here that makes a lot of sense. Honestly, I would like to have given you some of Bill's reaction. Unfortunately, I couldn't because if I had I would have broken one of my goals for the story. That was to be under 25,000 words total. Unfortuantely, I still exceded that, I did keep it under 30,000, but for that reason, things will not be nearly as detailed some of my other stuff.

You're going to see that this story is more a seris of oneshots that signify a change is occuring. I hoped, that by giving the reader the event, that they would be able to fill in the inbetween with their own imagination. Anyways I hope that gives you a reasonable explaination as to why you don't get to see more of Bill's reaction to what Harry tells him.

PS thanks for the spelling correction.

Name: ginny_potter (Signed) · Date: 09/18/05 5:35 · For: March 2013
Just a quick question to start of with, how many times can you be told you're great without it going to your head?? Hehe I mean your writing is great and captivating and i think almost everyone agrees with that. I've read other reviews for you and hardly ever is there anything that could be considered bad. I quite liked this chapter even though in away it asked more questions then answered but that makes me think about it more and my imagination can do as it pleases with it. Once again great story :) keep up the good work although i know you will...

Author's Response: First, thank you. Second, I really tried to do something different with this story. I wanted to give the reader plenty to play with and enough to carry the story, but at the same time I want them to use their imagination more. Hopefully they will get to fill in some of the things themselves. I guess we'll see how it all works out.

Name: alexander_m91 (Signed) · Date: 09/17/05 22:20 · For: March 2013
FANTASTIC! AMAZING! Great Story. I was waiting for this chapter. The only thing that I am sad with is that this time the chapters are short. Not like your other stories that have longer chapters. That makes them more interesting. I read this one really fast. I wanted a longer one.

Author's Response: Well, I really wanted to do something different than, Blood Traitor, or Unlocked Mind. One of the things I wanted to do was write something much shorter. Those two stories are over 150,000 words each. Broken, is under 30,000 words total and is also only about 12 chapters long. Either way, I hope you still enjoy it.

Name: crazyaboutpotter (Signed) · Date: 09/17/05 22:10 · For: March 2013
Great! Good to see that Harry trusts Bill. I can't wait to see how Harry answers Bill's question about Ginny.

Author's Response: Well, you're going to have to surmise from the rest of the story, what exactly Harry says to Bill, because I'm not going to come out and directly tell you.

Name: ginnyw_oredhair88 (Signed) · Date: 09/17/05 15:10 · For: June 2008
James Black, nice name, his name/ his dads name, plus Sirius. I like the first chapter! very intersting, i love the idea, hes older and stuff, so yea! can't wait for the next chapter!

Author's Response: Thank you. I kind of thought that, James Black, might be a natural name for Harry to use if he were to go into hiding.

Name: Czarina (Signed) · Date: 09/13/05 20:36 · For: June 2008
Great beginning chapter! The imagery was so well done and I like that you ended the chapter by giving the reader a lot of questions to ponder. I hope the next chapter is up soon.

Author's Response: Thank you. I'm glad I was able to paint the picture so well for you and for others. I really tried to write less, but put more into the scenes of this story than I did with my other stuff. Hope people like it.

Name: katie2424 (Signed) · Date: 09/12/05 23:16 · For: June 2008
This is a really great start to an even better story! I can't wait 'till you add more!

Author's Response: Thank you. The next chapter is in the queue and should be up soon. I hope you enjoy it too.

Name: Hormiga (Signed) · Date: 09/12/05 23:08 · For: June 2008
I found ur story whilesurfing around the fanfic...But something about it attracted me eyes ... I must admitt I felt terribly frustrated when I found out it is only one chapter so far.. I wanted more! MORE!! (ok i got a lit' carry away). Fantastic, plis update soon

Author's Response: Well, I'm glad you like it so far. I have submitted the second chapter, and it is just waiting for the mods to approve it. In the mean time you could check out any of the other 4 stories I have already written. They are all completed by the way, so no frustration about what happens next will set in.

Name: vigal (Signed) · Date: 09/11/05 23:00 · For: June 2008
I like your story! just one thing... I live in minnesota and I can assure you that it has never gotten to 85 degree below 0!! I laughed out loud when I read that! over all interesting story

Author's Response: Ok, I checked it out on the web, and accoriding to USA Today, the record low temp for Minnesota is 60 below Fahrenheit, recorded Feb. 2 1996 in Tower MN. So I exagerated a little. But I also live in Minnesota, for the last 27 years, and regularly subject myself to winters where it is 50 below, and when you get to that point what's the difference anyways? I mean it's just damn cold. But I think I will go back and edit it to be a degree warmer than the record low. Probably should have checked that out to begin with.

Name: potterfan62442 (Signed) · Date: 09/11/05 15:35 · For: June 2008
I like this story so far. How could I not? It's written by you after all. I can't wait to read your next chapter. I really like the feel of this story. You're the only author (besides JK Rowling) that has written a story that I can actually see whats going on inside my head. You're really good at it too. That's probably why I love your stories so much. I'll review on your next chapter. I put this story in my favorites so I'll keep reviewing on it as long as you keep writing it.

Author's Response: Glad to have you back. It's cool that I can actually place you into the scene with the characters in the story. That is what I am striving for. I've submitted the next chapter, so it should be up in a few days. Thanks again for reading my stuff and I'll talk to you again soon.

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