This is really good. Why leave it at that? Keep going!
I really like the mood that I got from this story. It wasn’t too angsty, but it wasn’t too…how should I say it…happy? Something like that. :P Anyway, in the middle is where I like it, so I for the most part, I enjoyed this story.
It was interesting to see the two places that you took Harry in this story. First to Godric’s Hollow, and then to his parent’s grave. I’m glad that you put these two places together; they went hand in hand. It was strange for Harry to find himself comforted by the sight of his parents' home. That was one of my favorite lines...sort of an…what do you call it? An oxymoron? Anyway, I liked how you injected some happiness into that part of the story because then we realize that Harry still has a little bit of hope and a little bit of his happiness left (and it would have been boring to have him shut everyone out at the sight of his parents’ home, LOL).
I also liked how you described one of the photos in Harry’s album of his parents. It was sentimental and really balanced out the mood of the story, in my opinion.
But that brings me to another point…sometimes you were a bit too descriptive. I think that you could have focused more of Harry himself and what he was feeling instead of describing the setting so elaborately. It was helpful, of course, to have a vision of where Harry and Lupin were and what the ‘tone’ of the place was like, but I didn’t get enough on how this made Harry feel (or how it made Lupin feel, for that matter).
And one really picky thing…(and forgive me if I’m wrong, I’m not the best at grammar stuff)…"Let's go," He said. I don’t think that ‘he’ should be capitalized.Really great story, though. I enjoyed it a lot. : )
That was so sad, and happy at the same time, and I could almost see the house!!! wonderful, a 10, u earned it! *Starts crying*