MuggleNet Fan Fiction
Harry Potter stories written by fans!

Name: Emiella (Signed) · Date: 06/28/05 11:18 · For: Pink hair and Truth or Dare
I like this story very, much it's an interesting twist, i have only one problem. I think, you hurry a bit with the story, you should elaborate more, the scenes, the people's feeling.

Author's Response: Thankyou! Yeah, I know, unfortunately I tend to do that. I'll try and work harder on that, I promise!

Name: Black_Swan (Signed) · Date: 06/28/05 10:04 · For: Pink hair and Truth or Dare
good twist , i like it alot update soon

Author's Response: Thankyou! There's a few more twists on the way as well....

Name: AnimeFreak1092 (Signed) · Date: 06/27/05 19:45 · For: Pink hair and Truth or Dare
I love the fact that u used something no one has b4( i read a lot of fics) u made James and Lily friends! I love it! I can't wait to read ur other stories and 2 read the nxt chappie! Also i submitted a story and if(i hope it does;) ) it gets ok'ed, i want to c ur review!!!! Can't wait 4 the nxt chapter!

Author's Response: Yeah, i wanted to be original so... that's what i did! I'll definitely review your story! keep reveiwin this, and tel me when urs has been accepted, and i'll definitely read it! Thankyou!!!

Name: vanillasweety (Signed) · Date: 06/27/05 17:29 · For: Pink hair and Truth or Dare
intresting story what year are they in im guessing five so because they just got there badges but then that means they have to get in a fight or something because in fith year she hates him aww damn im thinking to much agin any way great story can't wait to read more

Author's Response: Oh, sorry a lot of people are confused about this... it was supposed to be year six...but oh well. thanks for your review!

Name: Prongs (Signed) · Date: 06/27/05 7:01 · For: Pink hair and Truth or Dare
Omg this is such a great story so far!! I love the way Sirius answered his question for truth or dare! I can't wait for some romance between Lily and James. Update Soon!!!

Author's Response: Thankyou thankyou thankyou! Well, the romance doesn't come for a little while yet, but wait for it! Next chapter will hopefully be up soon!

Name: iuli12 (Signed) · Date: 06/25/05 20:25 · For: Pink hair and Truth or Dare
great story!!! i really is different from the other lily/james fics. i mean lily a marauder!!!!!!, how fun. can't wait till the next chapter!!!! plz review!! 10+++

Author's Response: Oh my gosh thankyou SO much! I'm really glad you like it..im working on getting the next chapter accepted right now, so hopefully it won't be too long!

Name: Mysterious Rose (Anonymous) · Date: 06/25/05 19:26 · For: Pink hair and Truth or Dare
I also agree with the others about the exclamation points. You also might want to check some other punctuation errors. I also noticed that it does not flow well, a well written story always flows. It is hard to make stories flow sometimes, but it necessary. Also, I am confused about how old they are. It says Lily had gone on the Hogwarts Express for 6 years, but she is just now becoming a prefect. Aside from the punctuation and flowing errors, this is a GREAT plot, and I am sure it will get better. Can't wait to read the rest of it!

Author's Response: Yeah, I'll try to work on the punctuation and the parts of the story that don't flow. Thankyou for your review, and please review next time!

Name: ermine the one (Anonymous) · Date: 06/25/05 9:58 · For: Pink hair and Truth or Dare
Yeh, same thing with the exclamation marks - they're really not needed. Ok, not bad, but again, you need to take a bit more care on the flow of the story - it seems to jerk around a bit like a roller coaster ride - but not in any good way. Also, there is a it of OOC in it with James, and Remus, who I really don't feel woulf lunge forward at the Lestrange's like that, and James didn't seem to care if the whole world knew that he fancied Lily. Other than that, good, though I prefer your other story. I'll gve you 6.

Author's Response: Hi again, yeah, i get a little carried away with the exclamation marks...promise ill try not to do it anymore. Ok, I'll try and work on the 'jerking around.' The OOCness is supposed, to be there, i was supposed to put a warning at the start, but i forgot...

Name: JessicaImmy (Signed) · Date: 06/25/05 1:04 · For: Pink hair and Truth or Dare
I would have to say that you should cut down on the exclamation points. It changes the tone, so it sounds different. I can't explain it, but it's like it's more childish. "Peter gave Remus some money, although no one but Sirius noticed!" does not need one. "‘Sorry James, what was that??? Didn’t quite hear ya mate,’" needs only one question mark. Also, "‘Well Bella, what we have here is 3 dirty scumbags, a blood traitor, and… three mudbloods.’" You might want to change 3 to three. Numbers in stories don't look good unless you're writing a price, like '$34.86' Hope you don't think I was too picky! With a little bit of work, this can go a long way!

Author's Response: Yeah, sorry about that, I get a little carried away.... Nah, it's okay, i love criticism.... thanks, im glad you like it

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