Reviewer: jinx_pickle_jinx
Date: 08/16/07 19:23
Chapter: It's A Horrible Life

*sigh* yet another ranking:

1. Grawpy the snowman
2. Buster THe Blue Beaked Hippogriff
3.Deck the Halls
4. How The Snape Stole Christmas
5. The Flightmare before Christmas
6. Twelve Days of Christmas
7. Its a Horrible Life
7. A Christmas Scarol

Reviewer: jinx_pickle_jinx
Date: 08/16/07 19:01
Chapter: The Nutcracked

WEEEEEEEEEE rankingggggg (duh what else would it be??):

1. Grawpy the snowman
2. Buster THe Bkue Beaked Hippogriff
3.Deck the Halls
4. How The Snape Stole Christmas
5. The Flightmare before Christmas
6. Hagrid Got run over by a reindeer
7. The Nutcracked
8. Twelve Days of Christmas
9. A Christmas Scarol

Reviewer: jinx_pickle_jinx
Date: 08/16/07 18:51
Chapter: Hagrid Got Run Over By A Reindeer

new ranking (squeee):

1. Grawpy the snowman
2. Buster THe Bkue Beaked Hippogriff
3.Deck the Halls
4. How The Snape Stole Christmas
5. The Flightmare before Christmas
6. Hagrid got run over by a reindeer
7. Twelve Days of Christmas
8. A Christmas Scarol

Reviewer: jinx_pickle_jinx
Date: 08/16/07 18:40
Chapter: The Twelve Days of Christmas

new ranking:

1. Grawpy the snowman
2. Buster THe Bkue Beaked Hippogriff
3.Deck the Halls
4. How The Snape Stole Christmas
5. The Flightmare before Christmas
6. Twelve Days of Christmas
7. A Christmas Scarol

Reviewer: jinx_pickle_jinx
Date: 08/16/07 18:30
Chapter: Deck the Halls

even newer ranking:

1. Grawpy the snowman
2. Buster THe Bkue Beaked Hippogriff
3. Deck The Halls (Mostly cus of the PMS part)
4. How The Snape Stole Christmas
5. The Flightmare before Christmas
6. A Christmas Scarol

Reviewer: jinx_pickle_jinx
Date: 08/16/07 18:23
Chapter: Buster the Blue-Beaked Hippogriff

new ranking:

1. Grawpy the snowman
2. Buster THe Bkue Beaked Hippogriff
3. How The Snape Stole Christmas
4. The Flightmare before Christmas
5. A Christmas Scarol

Reviewer: jinx_pickle_jinx
Date: 08/16/07 17:08
Chapter: Grawpy the Snowman

okay of the four i'ce read so far heres my ranking:

1. GRAWPY THE SNOWMAN!!!!!
2. How the Snape Stole Christmas
3. The Flightmare Before Christmas
4. A Christmas Scarol


but theyre all awsome!!

Reviewer: GetOutOfMyHead
Date: 07/02/07 0:03
Chapter: White Christmas

GRANDPAPA: YOU STUPID UGLY GIRL! YOU DESTROYED THE SOURCE OF MY POWER!!

LILY: What? Did that stick thing have pot in it or something?

GRANDPAPA: Uh…yes?

LILY: I’m gonna have to turn you in then Grandpapa!

GRANDPAPA: Wait! I mean no! I mean…just shut up.

LILY: Yes sir!

Lmao, that was an awesome story!! I laughed soooo much. *glues sides back on*. Harry's character was awesome and Dumbledore's French was funny.
2398465915623426301775602/10.

Reviewer: Hermione Lurves Ron
Date: 06/25/07 19:43
Chapter: The Twelve Days of Christmas

I hate H/Hr shipping but that wasn't too mushy so A+ 10 thousand kadrillion out of 10

Reviewer: Hermione Lurves Ron
Date: 06/25/07 19:25
Chapter: The Flightmare Before Christmas

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!! I like the Harry licking a lollipop part!

Reviewer: lily_emerald_evans26
Date: 06/20/07 5:50
Chapter: The Nutcracked

i coudlnt breathe for laughter!!!!!!!!

Reviewer: lily_emerald_evans26
Date: 06/20/07 5:36
Chapter: Hagrid Got Run Over By A Reindeer

i never heard of tht song.. still..
UMMMM i think 1 of ur chappiez shud b..... *thinks* OOOO HOW BOUT SUMTHIN JINGLE-BELL-ROCK-ish?!!!

Reviewer: lily_emerald_evans26
Date: 06/20/07 5:20
Chapter: The Twelve Days of Christmas

HAHAHHAHAHAHA THT WAS THE FUNNIEST FANFIC EEEEEEEEEEVVVVVVVEEEEEEEERRRR!!!!u like totalli rok this world man!!!!!

Reviewer: lily_emerald_evans26
Date: 06/20/07 5:01
Chapter: Buster the Blue-Beaked Hippogriff

THATS GOTTA B UR BEST CHAPPIE YET!!!!!!! that is WONDERFULL!!!! well done i luvd it!!! the 60-s dating game show LOL very creative!!! xxx ;P

Reviewer: lily_emerald_evans26
Date: 06/20/07 4:08
Chapter: The Flightmare Before Christmas

nice one! very funni! i came across this thru harry_potter_star.. its like her fav fanfic!

Reviewer: Sainyn
Date: 06/18/07 8:38
Chapter: The Twelve Days of Christmas

What? I wanted to quote only the part about neville and Snape going out through the window but... well, now you know what I mean!

Reviewer: Sainyn
Date: 06/18/07 8:32
Chapter: The Twelve Days of Christmas

THIS IS SO RUDDY BRILLIANT!

I owe for a lot of things:
First, for making my day a lot brighter (Whatever day is left, it is already 7:30 in the evening)
And also for improving my health (LAughter is teh best medicine?)

Please Ignore my ranting.

But these lines are so goddamn funny!

A Very Harry Christmas by Jase
[Reviews - 166] Printer Chapter or Story
[Add Story to Favorites] [Add Author to Favorites]
- Text Size +
Based on the song "The Twelve Days of Christmas" by Unknown Author. I do not, as you all know, own the Harry Potter characters or that song.
Note to readers: Sadly, I am running out of ideas for Christmas stories *Collective Gasp*. If anyone would like to give me a suggestion in a review, please feel free to.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

HARRY: This book seems to go on forever! How many stories are there??

RON: I think an infinite number until the author runs out of ideas.

AUTHOR: Got that right.

HARRY: The next story is called

THE TWELVE DAYS OF CHRISTMAS


NARRATOR: This book so far has made fun of a great many things. I think it is time to throw something new into the picture — what you delirious Harry Potter fans call “Ships.” Alas, the author of this story cannot please all of you. But, since he is awesome and has taken many hours to write this story, the relationships will be as follows:

Harry & Hermione
Ron & Luna

Don’t like it? Deal with it. They’ll switch around later.

NOW! On with the story!

It was twelve days before Christmas.

RON: *Stupidly* You know what we should do? We should give presents to our girlfriends on these last twelve days! Just like that carol!

HARRY: Okay. But why?

RON: Do you have a better idea for a story?

HARRY: Good point. Let’s think of what we can get Hermione and Luna…

NARRATOR:
On the first day of Christmas,
My true love gave to me
A ma-gical pot-pour-ri…


*CUT TO: HERMIONE opening a small box*

HERMIONE: I got a present! I wonder who it’s from! *Opens box*

BOX: *Opens. Inside is an assortment of spices and flower petals*

HERMIONE: Awww! Harry’s so sweet!

LUNA: *Comes up to HERMIONE* Did you get one of those too?

HERMIONE: Yeah — what’s in yours?

LUNA: Uh…bubotuber pus and tiny mandrake…Ron needs to get a dictionary.

HERMIONE: Yeah. Most people don’t know that a potpourri is a mixture of dried flower petals and spices used to scent the air.

LUNA: Well, it scents the air all right! *Plugs nose*

NARRATOR:
On the second day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Two cauldron cakes
And a ma-gi-cal pot-pour-ri…


HARRY: You think Hermione and Luna’ll like the cauldron cakes?

RON: I know Luna will like mine! They’re classic ones!

HARRY: What do you mean by “classic?”

*CUT TO: LUNA, examining one of RON’s cauldron cakes*

LUNA: Hey! I think this is from our first year!

HERMIONE: Yeah…Ron did always hoard food…

LUNA: This sucks. How long will this go on??

HERMIONE: Ten more days…

LUNA: *Groan!*

NARRATOR:
On the third day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Three flying brooms
Two cauldron cakes
And a ma-gi-cal pot-pour-ri…


*CUT TO: LUNA and HERMIONE, getting chased by six little brooms*

HERMIONE: ARE THOSE GUYS CRAZY??

LUNA: I’m breaking up with Ron.

HERMIONE: Well…I guess it had to fit the right number of syllables…

LUNA: We’ve gotta talk to them.

*CUT TO: RON, HARRY, LUNA and HERMIONE in the great hall*

HERMIONE: So what’s up with these gifts???

HARRY: Don’t you like ‘em?

LUNA: HELL NO!

RON: Aww, you’re so cute when you’re mad, honey *Kisses LUNA on the forehead and dashes off to get his next gift prepared*

HARRY: I’ll stop for you Hermione…not so sure about Ron though…

LUNA: Why me?

*CUT TO: RON, singing to himself*

RON:
On the fourth day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Four fire crabs
Three flying brooms
Two cauldron cakes
And a ma-gi-cal pot-pour-ri…


HARRY: *Watching RON* I don’t know if Luna’ll want fire crabs Ron…

RON: Nonsense! Who doesn’t like fire crabs!

*CUT TO: LUNA, getting chased by fire crabs*

LUNA: I DO NOT LIKE FIRE CRABS!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH!

*ENTER: HERMIONE*

HERMIONE: Hi Luna, what’s-*Sees fire crabs* Ohmigod!

LUNA: Hermione! Help!

HERMIONE: I, uh, would, but for some odd reason my wand is not working! Looks like you’ll have to run about the castle for a while to provide sheer amusement!

LUNA: AAAAAAAAAAAAH! *Continues to run for sheer amusement*

NARRATOR:
On the fifth day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Fiiiiiiiiiive maaaaaaaagic waaaaaaaaaaaaaands…
Four fire crabs
Three flying brooms
Two cauldron cakes
And a ma-gi-cal pot-pour-ri…


*CUT TO: LUNA, opening a box. Inside are five brand new, finely polished wands*

LUNA: What? Wands?

*ENTER: RON* Hiya honey! Like your new present?

LUNA: I already HAVE a wand.

RON: I know — but I thought you could use five more! And it only cost me my next five summers working at Ollivander’s shop to pay him back!

LUNA: I don’t need these. *Throws them out the window and into the lake*

RON: NOOOOOOOOO! I NEED THOSE!! *Dives into the lake after the wands*

LUNA: I apologize to you readers at the idiocracy of this chapter — sadly, the author of the story seems to have run out of ideas.

*ENTER: RON, sopping wet*

RON: I got the wands! The squid attacked me, but using expelliarmus on him with all five of the wands, I think I killed him!

LUNA: *Has a very close attachment to the squid in the lake* WHAT? You KILLED him??? *Is furious*

RON: Yeah! Isn’t that awesome?

LUNA: *Beats RON over the head with a table*

RON: Wwerareafweewjarlesjkalraejwlghelwajtrlejat? *Silly grin, then faints*

LUNA: *Huffy* THAT BOY HAD BETTER GET HIS ACT TOGETHER!

TIME: *Passes*

*ENTER: RON*

RON: *Has forgotten all about what happened yesterday due to receiving a bash by a table*
On the sixth day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Six yellow roses
Fiiiiiiiiiive maaaaaaaagic waaaaaaaaaaaaaands…
Four fire crabs
Three flying brooms
Two cauldron cakes
And a ma-gi-cal pot-pour-ri…


LUNA: *Takes ROSES* Just roses? Wow! You actually did something right!

RON: *Beams with pride and gets a golden sticker*

ROSES: *Come to life and start to sing “Sound of Music”*

LUNA: Huh?

RON: They’re ENCHANTED ROSES! They’ll sing to you!

LUNA: *Mutters indistinctively about using the Avada Kedavra curse on a certain redhead*

*CUT TO: The next day*

LUNA: *Wakes up to see the ROSES singing to her*

ROSES:
On the seventh day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Seven shooting stars
Six yellow roses
Fiiiiiiiiiive maaaaaaaagic waaaaaaaaaaaaaands…
Four fire crabs
Three flying brooms
Two cauldron cakes
And a ma-gi-cal pot-pour-ri…


LUNA: Huh? Shooting stars? *Is suddenly startled to death by seven meteorites that come crashing into the dorm room* HOLY CRAP!

OTHER RAVENCLAWS: *Waking up* Huh? What’s going on??

LUNA: *Embarrassed* Nothing, nothing! Go back to sleep! *Rushes to find RON*

*CUT TO: RON in the great hall. LUNA is running up to him*

LUNA: WHERE ON EARTH DID YOU GET THE IDEA TO SEND ME SHOOTING STARS??? THAT COULD’VE KILLED SOMEONE!

RON: *Giggle*

LUNA: What? What’s so funny?

RON: You’re wearing your jammies!

LUNA: *Realizes she forgot to change out of her nightgown* Ohmigod! *Runs out, turning red*

EVERYONE IN THE GREAT HALL: *Laughs their heads off*

DUMBLEDORE: *At the head table, laughing hysterically* Y’know, ordinarily I’m not supposed to make fun of students…but THAT! WOW!

*CUT TO: LUNA, sobbing at the edge of the lake and saying “Why me??”

LUNA: Why me??

NARRATOR:
On the eighth day of Christmas-


LUNA: *To NARRATOR* NO! Don’t say it! Spare me, spare me! *Pleads*

NARRATOR: I’m sorry. I would, but that would upset Ron, who we all know is a much more important character than you.

LUNA: *Grumble*

NARRATOR:
On the eighth day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Eight crystal balls
Seven shooting stars
Six yellow roses
Fiiiiiiiiiive maaaaaaaagic waaaaaaaaaaaaaands…
Four fire crabs
Three flying brooms
Two cauldron cakes
And a ma-gi-cal pot-pour-ri…


LUNA: *Is suddenly holding 8 large CRYSTAL BALLS in her hands* Awk!

CRYSTAL BALLS: *Are dropped*

LUNA: Hey! With these! I can see and prepare for what Ron’s getting me! *Grabs a CRYSTAL BALL* Oh magic crystal ball, can you show me what comes tomorrow?

CRYSTAL BALL: *Displays an “OUT OF ORDER” sign*

LUNA: Meh. Leave it to Ron to get the cheapest one in the store. *Throws the crystal balls into the lake*

*CUT TO: HARRY, talking to RON*

HARRY: Maybe you should stop giving Luna all of this stuff, Ron.

RON: NONSENSE! Luna loves it!

HARRY: …

RON: I can just tell by the way she’s been acting lately!

HARRY: You mean all the crying?

RON: Exactly! Tears of joy!

*ENTER: HERMIONE*

HERMIONE: Hmmm…no good humor fanfic is complete without someone falling. Have we had anyone falling yet?

HARRY: I don’t think so.

HERMIONE: Okay. Just checking. *Throws NEVILLE out a window*

NEVILLE: WHAT THE @#$%! *Acts very out of cannon* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-*Splat*

HERMIONE: *Looks out the window at his broken remains* You think that was funny enough?

HARRY: I’m not sure. Better do another one in case.

HERMIONE: You’re the boss. *Throws SNAPE out a window*

Reviewer: Sainyn
Date: 06/18/07 8:12
Chapter: Buster the Blue-Beaked Hippogriff

This is SOOO awesome! The best chappie so far.

Reviewer: pandora123
Date: 06/10/07 17:50
Chapter: The Flightmare Before Christmas

funny funny funny

Reviewer: Hermione Lurves Ron
Date: 03/31/07 20:55
Chapter: The Twelve Days of Christmas

Hermione Lurves Ron: *ROFLOL's so hard that she falls off her chair and hurts herself* Ohmygosh this is HILARIOUS! My fave is when Luna gets her 12 shots of crucio!

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