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Reviews For Sins of the Father

Name: pandafan81 (Signed) · Date: 01/19/07 1:10 · For: Chapter 5: Lucius
Guh! I wish I didn't have work tomorrow, otherwise I would stay up all night reading. And that my friend is a true, true compliment!

I just love the dynamics here. So I may not be much of a Lucius fan (I'll leave that to you) but I can appreciate the situation, and am rooting for Siobhan and Lucius now... And I'll totally revel in any spite that's thrown Narcissa's way...

Living with MJ has given you the true gift of converting people to your side... or did she learn that from you? Or when joined you create a super senergy of convertion? And does that make any sense? probably not. So I'm going to go to bed. and pick this up tomorrow as soon as I get home from work...

...I wonder if MNFF is blocked on the school computers...

Name: pandafan81 (Signed) · Date: 01/19/07 0:36 · For: Chapter 4: Almost Too Easy
Hahahahahahahaha! So perfect that we should be discussing orgies when I come across this little gem:

“While we’re there, I could show you some of my family’s fine collection of silk bedsheets…” he whispered.

Oh, I’m sure Lucius will take care of that, Siobhan thought waywardly to herself.

Fitting, no?

I REALLY liked the flashback at the beginning... Oh and here's Liam... Can't wait to see what happes there. I'm especially looking forward to more background there... excellent *rubs hands together in a slightly evil way*

I'm surprised Harry's tolerating Siobhan's behavior so well, especially when he catches her with Draco... but Harry is a unique guy when it comes to where he places his trust. Plus he's, hopefully, more mature. So I'm not complaining.

Marching off to chapter 5 before I go to bed. *nods*

Name: pandafan81 (Signed) · Date: 01/18/07 21:34 · For: Chapter 3: Of a Stranger
Great scene here... I like how Siobhan and Harry and interacting. I'm deeply impressed with the dialouge.

I have to say, I haven't read a lot of your work yet, Jenna. But I'm very impressed with how you write so simply... that doesn't really sound like a compliment does it? I mean, concisely. You don't bog down your story with unnecessary details or long descriptions just to make the story longer... I appreciate that, and I like how easily it flows.

I am obviously hooked now, and honor bound to finish. I vow to keep this window open until all chapters are read and reviewed!

Name: pandafan81 (Signed) · Date: 01/18/07 21:06 · For: Chapter 2: Something of Interest
I loveloveLOVE what you're doing here at the end, contrasting Siobhan's present, and her fantasy. Draco is just so... smarmy! I love how much I detest him.

So far I like that Harry's not judging her solely on being a Slytherin... good of him. Really, I can't wait to see what happens between here and what I know eventually happens. So, I'll cut this short and move on!

Name: pandafan81 (Signed) · Date: 01/18/07 20:32 · For: Chapter 1: Dangerous Attraction
hahahahaha: I guess "thinking about you dad" wouldn't have been a very tactful response.... :)

I could comment on characterization and so forth, but I KNOW so much about Siobhan from chatter, that seems silly. So obviously my reviews are probably not going to be SPEW worthy for a while :)

I'll just fangurl my Jenna and leave it at that. *proudly marches on to chapter two*

Name: VeniaTaint (Signed) · Date: 01/16/07 7:25 · For: Chapter 1: Dangerous Attraction
*taps foot impatiently* well, if you have so much of the plot already, WHY DON'T YOU UPDATE, MEANIE! sorry, *hehe* but you haven't updated in FOREVER and I'm starting to get rather depressed here...
~The Tainted One

Name: themehdis (Signed) · Date: 01/11/07 10:30 · For: Chapter 17: Disillusionment
excelent ...simply superb....i am waiting for an update

Name: dvnzuela (Signed) · Date: 01/06/07 20:20 · For: Chapter 17: Disillusionment
I love this story. I'm curious to know weather Narcissa will found out soon about Siobhan and Lucius. Please update soon

Name: sarasmiles (Signed) · Date: 01/01/07 17:51 · For: Chapter 17: Disillusionment
I started reading this story and have not been able to stop- I hope you have more chapters coming, this is amazing! What a creative story- please write more!

Name: Purplemage (Signed) · Date: 12/30/06 19:17 · For: Chapter 17: Disillusionment
Great chapter, Jenna! I've been meaning to review this for the longest time, but I...well...I hadn't. *rollseyes* This story gets more interesting with each chapter.

I'll start fom the beginning saying that I just love the title. It's a great word that it's no oftenly used, but it's not unheard of. A great eye-catcher if you ask me.

I believe that one of your strenghts as a writer is writing the dialogue, and it is very visible in this particular chapter. Even the one between Siobhan and Snape was enjoyable. How can you not like a tense discussion between to witty charaters as these? "It’s funny — you don’t really seem concerned about my well-being -- more about proving your own point" I particularly loved this line. It is very Siobhanesque. (hehe, I just made up a word.)

The scenes between her and Lucius are always enjoyable, of course. It was interesting to see them having their first huge fight. They've had discussions and arguments before, but never drama such as this. It was so irratating how Lucius kept avoiding the questions. I just wanted to stick my hand through the screen and bitch-slap him.

As the dialogue, the smutiness is very enjoyable. "Siobhan gasped as he muffled his pleasure with his teeth against her shoulder," This mental image made me smile. There is just something about bites during love-making that makes me guh! Sorry, for a second I forgot we were on MNFF and thought that we were on that dirrty community. *whistles*

Wonderful chapter, Jenna. I really want to see where this is going. I may not read it as soon as it is posted, but I must certainly will at one point or another.


Name: pdrsj56 (Signed) · Date: 12/23/06 4:10 · For: Chapter 17: Disillusionment
"I can't believe I'm so stupid,"
“I feel like --- a filthy whore
Lucius grabbed her arm and suddenly his eyes were filled with fire.

“Never speak about yourself in such a manner,” he commanded fiercely, as though she had insulted something in his possession. “Do you understand me?”
...Oh, Jenna they are both so caught and in such wrenching pain.....both trapped 'by the sins of the father'
Hatred coursed through her — hatred for Lucius. Hatred for herself. Hatred for his sins and her own; for his wicked deeds and beliefs, and her stubborn ignorance of them. Her heart ached with the pain of disappointment,
.....I didn't think it was possible to feel the same level of pain and empathy for Lucius as I found for Salazar.
.....how does she get through this next year to celebrate her birthday today??

Name: pdrsj56 (Signed) · Date: 12/23/06 3:52 · For: Chapter 16: Rising Tides
you know there is only one wording change I might make and that's Severus' use of the word 'shagging'. It's so out of sinc with the rest of the language and the generational content.

that's just my perspective as a member of Snape and Lucius' generation.

Name: pdrsj56 (Signed) · Date: 12/23/06 3:47 · For: Chapter 16: Rising Tides
“Excuse me?” she asked with biting formality, prowling up to the pair of them. “I seem to have misplaced something, I was wondering if you’d seen it?”

McGonagall gave her a look of startled confusion before she turned to give Longbottom a small, consoling nod. He walked off to sit down and the professor turned back to Siobhan questioningly.

“What have you lost, Miss Murphy?” she asked.

“Harry Potter,” Siobhan said simply.

Potter’s words resounded in her thoughts, and it sent a shiver through her spine. Yes, the two were different people, with different lives. And yet, despite the danger he faced, Siobhan had always envied him somehow. She saw that he had freedoms she did not, companions that she had lacked all her life, and there was what she most lacked: the courage not only to fall in love, but to acknowledge and labour for his heart’s desire with fervour and honesty. Potter did not lie to himself.
....working with conflict from within, denial, anger, rationalization, pain. Oh, Jenna so much pain. I told she would hurt and not necessarily have the ego strength to deal with it.

Name: pdrsj56 (Signed) · Date: 12/23/06 3:43 · For: Chapter 15: Secrets Revealed
There was still an unsettling feeling within her, though. Aside from guilt — a worry. Potter was too curious for his own good, and, perhaps, it was time to come up with a way to divert his attentions elsewhere.
....oh, Jenna. The limbic brain vs the higher/controlled brain. Your use of conflict is excellent. You orient it both within and without. Nice, very nice.

Name: pdrsj56 (Signed) · Date: 12/23/06 3:36 · For: Chapter 14: Mr Malfoy’s Reputation
hmm, this chapter's review seems to have been lost. Gist,
So many mixed emotions and loyalties. Be as gentle as you can with her, she's very special. Very special indeed

Name: pdrsj56 (Signed) · Date: 12/23/06 3:17 · For: Chapter 12: Confrontation With Fear
"Well, Potter should know that I’m fully capable of handling my affairs, and that his time would be better spent minding his own business.”
“I can hardly believe you’re a Slytherin,” Katie said with amused sarcasm."
...again, nice. very nice

Name: pdrsj56 (Signed) · Date: 12/23/06 3:12 · For: Chapter 11: Black Marble
"Breakfast was dull. Perhaps the Malfoys, in the holiday spirit, felt obliged to be more consistently civil towards one another than was routine"
...O.o nice, very nice

hmm, a 'black mark' reminder?

Name: pdrsj56 (Signed) · Date: 12/23/06 3:02 · For: Chapter 9: Up Against A Wall
"She had no idea if he expected her to speak, or if he would rather she didn’t.
A thought occurred to her that this was the reason normal people tended to have relationships as opposed to casual sexual encounters."
..Jenna, that is so good and very insightful.
"Clearly, you have a knack for treachery and manipulation"
..hmm, is Lucius right or is there something more here as well. Siobhan is so very much the `witch' within each of us.

Name: pdrsj56 (Signed) · Date: 12/23/06 2:53 · For: Chapter 8: Fulfillment
OMG...I know Jason can be like that but are you sure of Lucius? Don't let him hurt her.

Name: pdrsj56 (Signed) · Date: 12/23/06 2:35 · For: Chapter 4: Almost Too Easy
She's lovely. So young and yet so very old.

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