You have an absolutely amazing story here. I usually don't look at the stories in MNFF's featured section, but the summary looked interesting and I thought I'd check it out. Now I understand why your story was there. First off, it is extremely believeable. Miriam's character is very well-developed and is easy to connect to. One of the moments where you can see that the clearest is when Sirius is trying to give her a "distraction" and she said 'Nu-uh. You can't make me." Also, when you describe her feelings: guilt, nerves, fear, and longing. Your descriptions are very realistic. You've taken me inside your story and I am utterly in love with it. I also love that Sirius fell for a "plainer and smarter girl." The way Sirius and Miriam look after each other and comfort each other is so touching. It's interesting the way you took OoTP and added Miriam. I'm just hoping, praying, begging you not to kill Sirius in the end. Having him die was horrible in the OoTP, but after seeing such a personal side of him with Miriam, I don't think I could bear it! I also have a question, is Sirius in the pensieve watching this scene or is just a flashback? Update soon!
Wow. THis story is awsome! Update!!!
I LOVE this storie. Please finish it soon!
Of all the fan fic I have read on this site yours stands out for the maturity of writing and development of plot and characters. Enjoy your writing, I do.
Well I left a whole bunch of other reviews, and I find your story is both fun and heart-touching at the same time. That really really stinks that Sirius left before Miriam had a chance to tell him. Please update because I want to know what happens next!
Nice xmas present! I'm glad Sirius finally got the tofees, and the girl.
Heheh Sirius with a temper is back in this chapter. I really liked this line: "Whenever they were together, Sirius always managed some way to touch her". Well I had mentioned in my review of the previous chapter that Miriam seemed overly sensitive, but she was more detached from her emotions in this one. So I really like the way you have created this complex character.
Miriam is very sensitive! That was so mean, tossing the candy away when Sirius never even asked her to buy those. But he was being very reckless. I would have preferred she saved them for another time.
Sirius's entrance into the dormitory was like something out of a romance novel, and he did all that while in pain to boot. I know Miriam was angry at first but you knew that she wouldn't be for long.
Usually Sirius is depicted as mischievous and cordial, or otherwise moody. So to read an angry, almost violent, Sirius, was a bit unnerving. The closest I ever saw of him losing it was in OOTP when he faced off with Snape. It never occurred to me that he'd be like that, but it makes total sense considering the crap he had to deal with, Lily/James dying and Azkaban. He puts up a very strong, brave front in the books. To see him pissed off at Miriam surprised me, and I'm glad she slapped him because she doesn't deserve to be spoken to that way. But it's almost like a relief to finally read something where he's losing it.
The writing on the back of the photograph was beautful!
Miriam is quite a character, with her intellect matching Sirius's roguish charm. I also liked the way you described her beauty, which is a more accessible for readers, as opposed to making her a supermodel.
I love this storie!! I cant wait for the next chapters. Please hurry!
I have read your fanfiction, everything of a single time and, well it has surprised me! I had never read one fanfic so good where The Marauders were involved!
I got to say goodbye once and for all, I hope you continue soon because I have many doubts to clarify... sometimes I think that I don't understand well (that is because it is not that I know much English, I speak Spanish), but however...
I die from longings!!!
WHAT HAPPENED TO THE BABY ????
Finish it! PLEASE!
please please upload.please please please I beg you
Oooohhh... me likes. This is very interesting. Can't wait to read more... tomorrow. I'm way tired.
Woo i found this story!!! :D I read chapter one a while ago but lost it....I'm now rereading it, this is fab!!
This story is fantastic! I like how there are two different stories sort of going on at the same time: Miriam and Sirius in the past, on the one that's present- Miriam brewing that potion and Sirius in the pensieve. There's only one thing about this fic that i didn't like in the beginning: Miriam cried too much, but now, i can see why: two reasons- Miriam's had a lot of emotional events happen to her ( A LOT), and, she's pregnant (A very good reason.). Speaking of that-SHE'S PREGNANT! wow, i wonder where the child is in the present version of your story...Oh, well, i guess i'll have to wait. Please update as soon as you can- I love your story!! (and, i'm impatient :))
LOVE THE STORY