i LOVED this story
this is my favorite chapter so far. it is soo funny
Just a side note here... The marauders map doesn't show the room of requirement on it, therefore they wouldn't know where sirius was because he wouldn't appear on the map
"healthy draught??" come on, you can do better than that.
wow what i great fic i just finished reading the whole thing and it seemed to get better as it progressed
What was your favorite quote in L/J: Their Story of Love? I don't have time for that, it's 60 chapters long!
Who was your favorite JKR created character? (ex. Sirius, Lily, James, Remus) I love Sirius, always.
Who was your favorite OC? (ex. Katy, Halle) Grace. I think she's pretty.
Which villain did you hate the most? (ex. Venus, Cole, Voldemort, Peter?) Venus
Who was your favorite couple? I like James and Lily... even though they broke up way too much.
Is there anything you didn’t like story-related? (I’m not speaking of grammar.) What happened after they were trapped in the firey trees with the snakes?? Hello! They like pass out and then they're walking around Howarts...
Well, All in all, it was not bad. afew critiques that may help future stories, the chapters were very short and this story could have been shortened to about 30 chapters. Also, try to keep the characters IN character... I realize this is your story and OOC is my least favourite thing to get yelled at for (my characters are said to be a bit out of character and it bugs me) but there are points that are just not believable at all and take away from the character, such as when Dumbledore gets drunk. That wouldn't happen. My last complaint is the language. Yes, it's fun to excercize your freedom of speech once in a while, but there are other ways to address someone other than "dumb bitch". Excessive foul language takes away from the meaning of the story and the effect of the sentences following it wears of.
Just a bit of hopefully helpful advice. I enjoyed it.
PS, you apparently like Marauders, so you might want to check out my story, Alone if you get the time
i would have broken voldemorts wand.
but this chapter is full of emotions, it really got me into it!!!
is she really never going to heal??
very good action.
the vounter spell for Colloportus is Alohomora, a death eater used it in book 5 in the departement of mysteries when they were searching for Harry and the others in the multiple rooms of the departement of mysteries. so i think that the death eaters were not as stupid as to not think of alohomara to open the door. neither voldemort.
anyway, like the action. im keeping on reading :)
how did voldemort get there? on the giant crow? but again, its not possible to get out of the castle using a portkey, Hermione always said so to Harry, reference: Hogwarts, a history. due to the wards, it is impossible to come and go to and from the grounds and the castle by any magical means, apart from the room of requirements and floo powder(only when the channel is opened though) and again, by walking through the gates.
now with DH, we know that james didn"t really had the time to duel with voldemort because he had lef his wand on the couch. we can see that in the chapter just after harry and hermione's narrow escape from bathilda"s house in godric"s hollow !;
anyway, i like the idea of them having like premonitions.
james isn't moved more than that of his parents' death??? strange
hum hum, so far the story is very interesting :)
but the thing that made me write was about an unclear point i saw in this chapter: the portkey that took them away from voldy, it make them land in the castle??? because, because of all the wards and protection spells around hogwarts, it is impossible to enter the grounds of the school by any other means than by walking through the gates (even dumbledore had to undo some spells to fly in on broomstick on the night of his death). well, thats why i wrote.
anyway, the story is pretty good so far, so i'll keep on reading until the end, i love james/lily fanfics!
:) i really like how the story is proceeding so far...can't wait to read more!
wow Peter must be horrible! I AM SO HAPPY PETER STRANGLES HIMSELF I N DH! wow i get into it...its just a fic Caroline...just a fic
didnt he stop for a moment to think, I thought this was an anti prefects club! IDIOT!
its like im looking from a distance standing in the backround everybodys saying hes not coming home now this cant be happening to me this is just a dream....i thought of that song again.
weird...i alsways imagined Halle the impulsive one...btw is it Hal-e or Haall like long a? i think of the weirdest things!
omg!!!!! i wanted to review this the first time but i was too young...anyways my fourth grade teacher always said "Caroline, your writing has so much fluff." it would get me so agrivated!!!! and now that you said that that chapter was fluff, i relize that fluffyness is not such a bad thing...
i remember it took me like two weeks to get up to this chapter, this time its taking me two days...wow!
its like im looking from the distance standing in the backround everybodys saying hes not coming home now this cant be happening to me this is just a dream.... i thought of that song the first t ime i read this fic and now ive finally typed it. When Katy is talking about watching Lily and James especially