Awww, I feel bad for Remus. He always has to transform alone. This was pretty well written, and I liked the beginning and ending with today's Moony.
Hee hee is Peter gonna barf? This is cool so far.
Awwwww! I liked the end. It almost made me cry. Poor Lupin. He must feel terribly alone. Very good overall.
There are a couple of spelling errors--I noticed the ones in the second chapter, but there might be ones in the first chapter also. I liked the idea of a potion to help with the initial Animagus transformation, and I thought the scene with the werewolf playing with the other animals was very touching. Nice Fic!
Overall, good job! Firstly, I'd like to note that you have a very unique and interesting writing style; you made this piece fun to read. With that said, there are a couple of errors that I found. Firstly, in the very first sentance, you use an unnecessary comma. Following promptly in the next sentance you use another unnecessary comma. I'm not sure if this is a certain issue you have, but I'll give you a couple hints about proper comma usage (Besides the use of commas in a series, only use them if you intend to have a break in the reading. Also, only use commas before conjunctions if the second part of the conjunction can be a complete simple sentance. For instance, the sentance 'We went to the store and bought a purse.' does not need a comma; this sentance on the other hand, does: 'We went to the store, and I found the perfect purse.') Also, you must learn the the semi-colon is your friend; it makes your writing much easier to read and allows you to eliminate unnecessary commas. Another grammatical error is that you put your quotations in italics; there is no need for this. The proper use of italics would be to indicate inner-monologue or possibly an afterthought to a statement. Italics are generally only used when the character is saying or thinking something that noone else can hear. Besides these simple errors, I found your story to be a good read. Keep up the good work! -HPFan11
Very good, there were some typos and stuff, but it was still great. I liked how you made Remus sort of experiment with the animagi before warming up to them. The end was sad with the 'except this time he'd be alone' overall it was great!
hey, great so far! there are a couple of typos, but it's a really cool plot and stoyline so far! keep it up!