MuggleNet Fan Fiction
Harry Potter stories written by fans!
(Signed) · Date:
06/11/09 14:12 · For:
Minna, let me begin with complimenting your awesome summary. It sounds so mysterious and intriguing. I can’t wait to read the actual story when the summary itself is so fantastic.
I then get thrown right into Elaine leaving her home. Beginning the story like this propels the reader right in; the story charms itself into the readers mind and won’t let go. I read the prologue a few days ago, but was unable to leave a review at that time. Over the next few days this chapter stayed in my mind as my thoughts were steered back to the captivating beginning of this surely fantastic tale of Wildwood. It’s a brilliant way to open a story and ensure readership, Minna, and you’ve mastered this difficult step fantastically well.
I love the description of Carrick Manor. It paints a beautiful image in my head, and I can imagine how sad Elaine feels that she has to leave. The feeling of mystery from the summary continues, building gradually until I learn from Elaine’s thoughts why she leaves her home for Wildwood. The description continues throughout the chapter, showing in clear details and with a wide choice of words what the estate and surrounding wood is like. I especially liked the mural in Elaine’s room. Your usage of words to describe the mural was fantastic, and though you never mention the colour blue, it creeps into my mind all the time, referring back to Carrick Manor and the sea. It shows how deep both estates are connected with each other, and not only because they are the property of Elaine’s family. This connection gives me the impression that the sea in its infinity is a part of Elaine’s character and Wildwood, although the estate lies within a wood and far away from the sea. The sea is a powerful thing and should never be underestimated, and the same I believe can be said about Elaine and Wildwood. The name “Wildwood” itself is mysterious and wonderfully chosen. The references to Merlin in Wildwood’s history and naming your main character Elaine promise a legend in its own, and this is wonderfully shown by the title of the story itself. Minna, the overall picture of the story is just wow.
What I loved most about the chapter is the way you interwove narration, description and dialogue. Nothing is too short or too much, balancing out exceptionally. Great job. But the thoughts Elaine has at the end, It’s the strong, the brave that make history. The heroes., I love just as much. They end the prologue with a sense of finality and yet leave room for a lot of interpretation and future chapters. I have the feeling these two sentences are a foreshadowing of what will happen to Elaine. I sense danger that will come upon her, but also that she will be all right at the end of her adventure.
I don’t yet see much of Elaine’s characterisation, but the basis of her being a young woman with an interest in history promises that enticing adventures in and around Wildwood will unfold in future chapters. I can’t wait to read more about the story and get to know Elaine better. Please continue writing and updating.
Author's Response: Oh thanks Bine, that review was so sweet! -hugs- Since I usually go all plain-spoken in fics, I decided this was teh one where I would pursue my love of cool description/mysteriousness/etc. Glad that worked out. =)
...And that's the problem with writing a fic that will jump between eras. Elaine is currently not coming back until the epilogue, whenever that happens. I guess you could say the main character of this fic is Wildwood. xD
But seriously, thanks for the lovely review. -hugs again-