"Gilderoy, you'd better be done with my quill, it's the only one I've got and--"
"Oh, relax, Rita darling. You'll thank me when I'm done--which I almost am." With that, Gilderoy went back to work, his wand in one hand and her bright green quill in the other.
Rita rolled her eyes and returned to her own multitasking--writing a Transfiguration essay and eating her dinner. She gritted her teeth as her
pencil snapped for the fourth time. "I hate these stupid contraptions!" she growled. "They write too lightly, and they smudge, and all this breaking is making things messier!" Slamming her head down onto the Slytherin table, she lamented, "This'll bring down my Transfig average for sure!"
"Actually, that big
red spaghetti
sauce blotch might do that better than the pencil," Gilderoy quipped, not taking his eyes from his spells.
Rita grimaced. "Thanks for that, Prince Charming." She crumpled up the now-useless parchment as she ate.
"
Origami?"
"Better the paper than your face, O Smart One."
"I have the face of an
angel, thank you."
"Yeah, which one? Lucifer?"
"Fine," Gilderoy huffed, nose in the air. "I'm finished with your quill, but maybe I'll just undo it now."
Rita frantically shook her head. "No, please, I'm sorry, I'll take it back, just give me my quill--"
"Tell me I'm beautiful."
"
What?"
"Do you want your quill back?"
"Yes, but--"
"Then tell me I'm beautiful."
"...fine, you're beautiful, gorgeous, handsome, you could bag any bird you want."
"Could I even bag you, if I wanted?"
"You're pushing it..."
"Well, could I?"
"If you don't give back that quill, the whole school knows you use peroxide."
"Okay, okay!" Gilderoy protectively shielded his precious hair with his hands and gave Rita back her quill. "Let me demonstrate." He gingerly pulled out a clean sheet of parchment. "Ahem. Record this. Sixth-year Slytherin Gilderoy Lockhart has successfully charmed a self-writing quill." The quill started scrawling
Handsome blond student Gilderoy Lockhart, an ingenuous sixteen, stands before me with his forget-me-not-blue eyes glistening with new ideas. He has just revealed a stunning new invention to the world...
"For me?" Rita managed, in awe.
"Who else?" Gilderoy nodded, seconds before being clinched in a tackle-hug.
"Oh for the love of all that is good and holy, you're a genius, I love you so much right now, and--" Rita stopped cold upon catching a glimpse of a sketch in the margin of Gilderoy's notes. It was him, at the
beach, surrounded by adoring fans.
Gilderoy squealed, covering his notes hastily. "You weren't supposed to see that!"
"No, no," Rita smirked. "I can repay you now. I have an idea to help you get famous like that, and it doesn't involve you doing anything."
"Really?"
"Don't you know memory charms?"
"Best in the class!"
"Then that's all you need. Listen, you just have to..."