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Thread: Pairing - Remus/Tonks

  1. #1

    Pairing - Remus/Tonks

    Remus and Tonks' relationship gives me a lot to think about. For example, does anyone out there think that they were dating secretly? Were they, perhaps, going steady in secret for a while until Remus decided they had gone too far? Or were they dating openly through OoTP, and Remus cut it off in HBP? Or were they just really good friends and they wanted to be together, but Remus was too noble to put her in danger?

    I guess what I'm really asking is: What are the odds of them having a secret relationship and then breaking off (for noble reasons, of course)?

  2. #2
    jenny b
    Oooh! I love Remus/Tonks!

    Anyway. I always thought that it wasn't until the start of HBP/end of OOTP that anything actually "happened" between them. I think that it would have been the summer holidays, in the aftermath of Sirius's death. I'm guessing they got together, just for a while. Then Remus broke it off, for "noble reasons".
    That's when Tonks got really depressed, as you see at the start of HBP. Molly Weasley knows about their relationship, from when Dumbledore drops Harry off at the Weasleys and she had been talking to Tonks, and Tonks thanks her for the "Tea and sympathy". But if Molly knew while they were dating, then I'm not sure.
    As to if anyone else would've known, I think that Remus would want to keep it quiet for a while, but Tonks would want to tell the world. I don't think anyone would've known for sure, because I don't think they were dating for long.

    Hope that helped!

  3. #3
    I think they had to have dated for a little while at least. I mean, they got married at the beginning of DH, and Lupin doesn't strike me as a guy who would get married after only about 2 months of dating. Especially with the war and everything. And I don't think it would've hit Tonks quite as hard if Remus had just rejected dating her; it seems like it would be a lot worse if they had dated and then Remus got all noble and broke it off after she was emotionally involved.

    But as for whether or not this was secret or out in the open, I don't know. Remus doesn't exactly seem like the type to hide a relationship that really doesn't need to be hidden, but you never know. I think it could easily be written either way.

  4. #4
    Thanks for all the help! I think I'm going to go for the secret relationship. Tonks would probably want to shout it to the worl, but she might also want to keep it a secret so that it's more romantic. And Remus doesn't strike me as a guy who is comfortable with public displays of affection, so he would be okay with keeping it a secret. Thanks again for all the help!

  5. #5
    I think they would have had to have some sort of encounter, or prior attempt at a relationship, being that Tonks is portrayed as a smart girl, clumsy but smart. JKR doesn't put in details about a character unless they are important, such as her being so young and already being an Auror. I don't think she would have had just a silly little crush, professing her undying love for a man who has no interest in her. And being that Lupin always has a level head, and takes responsibility for his actions, he probably felt horrible and that he let his head get away from him, by falling in love with her. He just would never allow himself such a luxury as love. He beats up on himself a lot. If they didn't have a secret relationship, I could defiantly see a steamy kiss followed by a " I can't do this! " from Lupin. The scene with Bill and Fluer in the hospital was the turning point, I think!

    Hope that helped!

  6. #6
    Wizengamot Hufflepuff
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    Just a very quick point and my own interpretation of Remus and Tonks. They must have had some kind of relationship in OOTP because we see Tonks has feelings for him at the very beginning of HBP.

    Remus doesn't exactly seem like the type to hide a relationship that really doesn't need to be hidden

    I disagree because Remus would think it needed to be kept hidden. I believe he knows that by being in a relationship with anyone means he's risking their life. I don't mean that he'd bite them whilst he's a werewolf, I mean more that their livelihood would be at risk. Remus is very poor, he can't get work. Dolores Umbridge has drafted yet more anti-werewolf legislation. He is looked down on practically everyone in the wizarding world- except The Order. Even Tonks' parents disapprove- and Ted is seen as a kind cheerful man. I can't believe that Remus wouldn't know the consequences. It must have taken some pretty hefty persuasion by Tonks to get him to be her husband. I think at the start of their relationship it would have been the kind of thing he drifted into and before he knew it he was in love with the girl and then the added shock that she returned his feelings. Fenrir's attack on Bill and Arthur's sad words persuade him temporarily but he still wavers. It's Harry's taunts that force him back (YAY to Harry!)

    There's a bit in POA when Ron discovers that Remus is a werewolf. He's repulsed and refuses Lupin's help. Remus flinches. This is very much the reaction he gets from the whole of the wizarding world. Hermione and Harry are much less prejudiced.

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  7. #7


    This one could go either way.

    Remus, with his noble sense, wouldn't allow himself to date Tonks secretly because he didn't want to potentially injure her by being a werewolf.

    Or, Tonks could have persuaded Remus to start a relationship, and he would agree because they both liked each other. But then, Remus would realize his 'mistake' and break it off, not wanting to endanger Tonks with being a werewolf.

    Hope this helped!

  8. #8
    The way I think it happened, was that they were friends and went on 'dates', just as friends, but Tonks wanted to be even more than friends, so they dated, before Remus broke it off when he thought they were going too far. That's just how I think they got together.

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