APRIL MONTHLY CHALLENGE ~Who's the Fool Now?~

PRANKING THE PRANKSTERS

Aware that the challenges have been lacking in TTB for a while, your barmaid has decided that now is the time to let loose with a new monthly challenge.

April 1st is, of course, April Fool's Day, but I doubt it was the only day the jokers of Hogwarts played their jolly japes and pranks. So ... let's cheer up April and write a few tricks of our own.

You may write in one of three eras

Marauder
Trio
Next Gen

Your drabble must include either a Marauder (or all of them), a Weasley twin (or both), or James Sirius Potter (because I reckon he's the joker in the pack). However, they are to be the victim of the prank. It has to take place at Hogwarts or Hogsmeade. If you write Marauder Era, you may use Peter or Remus to prank James or Sirius, but not vice versa.

Use this form for your submission:

PHP Code:

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[B]Name:[/B]
[B]House:[/B]
[B]Title:[/B]
[B]Era:[/B]
[B]Word Count:[/B]
[B]Ratings/Warnings:[/B]
[B]A/N:[/B] 


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All drabbles must be compliant with MNFF submission guidelines and must be between 300-750 words.

Points ...

Because there have been precious few competitions recently, I am giving FIVE points for participation to each entrant. You may submit more than one drabble, but you will only get one set of points.

First place will get a further 15 points
Second place - 10 points
Third place - 5 points.

EDIT: This competition will close at 10PM BST 30th April.


Mesdames Carole and Russia - now both Gryffindors, apparently

Madam Russia edit: It's the best way to be ;)

:( It is a sad day indeed when the only entrant to a TTB competition is from one of the barmaids.

COME ON GUYS, GET WRITING! If I can do it, you can too!

(I get no points for this BTW, it's just for the funsies!)

Name: Madam Russia
House: Gryffindor
Title: Someone Else...
Era: Triooooo
Word Count: 401
Ratins/Warnings: Some bad attempts at writing...
A/N: Twas fun to write for the first time in MONTHS. Don't judge the grammar, it's un-beta'd >.>

Quote:

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“Hey, Fred?”

Fred looked up from where he was sitting fiddling with something that looked suspiciously like a Pygmy Puff, but smelt like Bobutuber pus mixed with violets.
“Yes, Angelina? “

“Can I talk to you about something?”

“Don’t worry about it, I promise I’ll try not to totally outshine you when I take you to the ball tomorrow.”

Angelina smiled sarcastically, “Oh, you’re so funny! No, but I do want to talk to you about the ball...”

“Yes?” Fred placed the Pygmy-thing back on the table in front of him, stood up and turned to face the tall Gryffindor Chaser.

“The thing is... I’ve changed my mind. I know you asked me first... but I think I’d rather go with someone else because... well they asked me too.”

Fred snorted, “Yeah, sure. Who?”

Just then Neville Longbottom came traipsing down the stairs from the boy’s dormitory. His face lit up when he saw Angelina.

“Hi, Angelina!” He mumbled nervously, “Are we still on for the ball?”

“Absolutely!” Angelina grinned. “I was just explaining to Fred...” she turned back to face him.

Fred’s jaw fell open. “Wha...wha..but...how...?”

“I’m really sorry Fred...” Angelina tailed off awkwardly, and smiled sympathetically.

Then she took Neville’s hand and, tucking her long hair behind her ear, led him towards the portrait hole. Just before she stepped out onto the corridor beyond, she turned back to Fred.

“Oh, I almost forgot. Eloise wanted to know if you were going to the ball with anyone... I knew that I was going to go with Neville instead, so I told here you weren’t.” She paused and looked towards Neville, then back to Fred. “I may also have told her that you’d go with her.”

If possible, Fred’s jaw dropped even further.

“At least you won’t be dateless... be careful not to be outshone though, won’t you?”

Angelina grinned at him and stepped out of the portrait hole. Just before it swung shut, Fred caught a glimpse of a Hufflepuff girl waiting outside. Angelina said something to her and she smiled nervously, smoothing her hair down and itching a slightly off-centred nose.

Once she was well down the corridor to Gryffindor tower, and was sure Fred wasn’t following, Angelina let go of Neville’s hand, “Thanks Neville, I’m sure that knocked him down a peg or two.” She quickly pecked him on the cheek and strolled off towards the Great Hall.

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Love to all! ~ Russia xxxxx

Name: MOI!
House: The House of The Three Broomsticks
Title: Gobstoppers
Era: Next Gen (and a bit of Marauder)
Word Count: 747
Ratings/Warnings:Mild profanity/ excessive silliness
A/N: The end is an indulgence ... so indulge me.

Quote:

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The girl with a green knitted beret on her head, and an apple in her hand, ducked behind the corner of the Three Broomsticks when she saw her brother approaching.

It wasn’t that she didn’t like him. In the usual run of things, she got on far better with him than any of her other relations (especially Albus who could be an uptight arse at times).

However, James had really annoyed her last night. She’d walked into the Great Hall, trying to act nonchalant in front of the Hufflepuff table (Greg Cadwallader was looking so lush, these days), when James had struck. Not only had he started making kissy faces at Lily, he offered in a very loud voice, to go right over to the Hufflepuff table and have a ‘man to boy chat with Greggy’. When Lily has hissed at him to shut up, he’d added in an even louder voice that he was ‘only looking out for his baby sister.’

Embarrassed, Lily had walked straight out of the Great Hall and to the kitchens, where she’d munched her way through a bowl of apple crumble and then felt sick.

Greg had not been at breakfast the following morning, but she’d seen him head off into Hogsmeade with a girl from Hufflepuff.

Bloody James!

“What are you doing lurking out here?”

Lily looked up and saw Rosmerta levitating an empty barrel across her back yard. “Sorry, I was avoiding someone.” She swallowed. “My brother, James, actually. He’s being perfectly foul at the moment, and I don’t want to see him yet - not until I’ve sorted out how to make him pay.”

Rosmerta started laughing. “You know something, Lily. I know everyone says you’re just like your mum, but you’ve always reminded me far more of your namesake.” She winked. “Now, your mum was very good at revenge. I remember seeing her Bat-Bogey Hex, but it wasn’t subtle. Your grandma, however...” She lowered her voice. “Lily Evans always thought the punishment should fit the crime, so when your granddad used Swelling Solution on a spider and introduced it into the girls' bathroom...”

Lily’s eyes lit up with excitement. “What did she do?”

“She devised a big sticky web across his bed that trapped him for an hour.” She laughed at the memory. “Sirius tried to pull him free and got stuck, too. They were pulling bits of web off their skin for days.”

“Wow! And I’ve always been told that my grandma was practically perfect.”

“Perfect for your granddad, maybe,” Rosmerta murmured. “He would never have settled down with a goody-goody.”

Lily grinned at Rosmerta, her mind now awhirl with an idea.

It was simple to buy the sweets, and easy to Charm them. The hardest part would be getting James to eat them, yet Lily thought she’d found the perfect way.

“Lily! My baby sister!” yelled James from his table. “All by yourself!”

“Go away,” she shouted back, hiding her grin as she pulled out the bag of sweets.

“Ooh, what you got, Lils?” he asked, and standing up he waltzed across to her.

“Nooo!” she cried, as he snatched them. “James, give them back! They’re mine!”

A grinning James opened the bag and spying the sweets, helped himself to three.

“Ta Lily,” he said cheekily, and then he started to chew.

Lily stood there staring at her brother. She watched as his lips started to swell, and cheeks puff out. She saw as his look of astonishment turned to one of horror, as the sweets in his mouth became larger and stickier, clogging up his teeth and tongue.

“Aghl,” he spluttered. “Wha guh gug, Ly?”

“What are you asking me, darling brother?”

He pointed frantically to his mouth. “Wha guh gug?”

“Goo goo ga ga?” she cooed, and smiled sweetly. “Aww, has Jamesie decided he wants to be a baby? How cute.” She turned away from him. “I did tell you not to eat my sweets, you silly baby. Perhaps next time you’ll listen.”

Then, turning on her heel and brushing past Greg who looked rather alarmed at her trick, she left the Three Broomsticks.

“Oy, Potter!” someone shouted after her. Looking back, she faltered when she saw the smirking face of Scorpius Malfoy peering round the door. “If you’ve got any more of those sweets, I wouldn’t mind shutting your bloody cousin up, as well.”

Seeing his smile, Lily felt something inside of her lift. This day was definitely ending on a high.

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See, I did two pranks in one drabble. Tis easy, you barflies!

Madam Carmerta

Name: thegirllikeme/Chante'
House: Ravenclaw
Title: Epigenetics
Era: Next Gen
Word Count: 742
Ratings/Warnings: 1st/2nd Year - None
A/N: I love George and little Roxanne.

Hopefully, this does fit into the prompt. It does take place in Hogsmeade, since George said he opened up a shop there.

Quote:

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“You’re totally cramping my style,” I complain. “How am I supposed to charm all these ladies when you keep stealing all the attention?”

Roxie smiles up at me politely, a small grin that just barely shows her front tooth. That’s right, I said tooth. The other one is currently sitting under her pillow in the hopes that some fairy will exchange it with a Galleon, as is supposedly a Muggle tradition. Thank you, Hermione.

I shoo my employees away from my five-year-old daughter and help Roxie off the front counter. Excitedly, she runs towards my workshop. It has only been a year since I opened up a second shop in Hogsmeade, but it has already paid for itself. The children of Hogwarts love having their supplies so close at hand; Filch, my old friend, is just so thrilled about that as well. But I didn’t think anyone has been so excited as Roxie. She loves visiting me at the shop, and running two shops meant I am forced to bring her more. Fred, however, prefers to go to Quidditch practice with Angelina, and neither of them much like being babysat by Angelina’s mother. I, for one, can’t blame them.

As I enter the workshop, I find Roxie pulling a stool from the corner to my desk. I help her, before setting myself on the other side of the desk. The cauldron before me has been simmering all night, and it now bubbles blue, letting out a smell the mixture of blueberries and farts.

“Remember, Roxie, if Mummy asks…”

“I wasn’t in your workshop.”

She really is a bright girl.

I pick up a wooden ladle and stir the contents of the cauldron. It is the start to a new variety of the Skiving Snackboxes. The students of Hogwarts have been complaining that the teachers have figured out all the old sicknesses. It’s a sad day when teachers tell kids with bleeding noses just to ‘shut up and take the other pill’. Granted, flatulence among your peers might not be the least embarrassing of options, but I knew kids desperate enough to risk the social slight.

“Roxie, can you hand me the powdered bicorn horn?” I point a finger at the messy selves and she happily scurried to get it. I glance away at the book open before me. Somewhere under the pumpkin juice stains, the book informs me powdered bicorn horn, when mixed with the Bundimun secretion already in the potion, will create a ripe stench.

Roxie returns and holds up the small wooden box with a proud smile on her face. I take it and am about to scoop out the powder, when the name on the box stops me. “This is powdered Erumpent horn. It causes an explosive reaction with mixed with Bundimun secretion.”

I send her back to the shelves and she quickly returns with the proper ingredient. I add a little as Roxie stands by my side, watching me intently. I have a feeling she’ll be a good little inventor…one day. That is, if she ever turns out to have a mischievous bone in her body. So far, she has been disappointingly well-mannered.

I set the jar on the desk and take an experimental sniff. Deciding that the stench is not foul enough, I pick up the jar and sprinkle in more.

BOOM!

The sensation of flying might have been fun, if it hadn’t been accompanied by a painful collision with the floor. I force myself upright, my vision still burning from the bright explosion of moments ago. Thick, grey smoke is rapidly filling the workshop.

“Roxie! Where are you? Roxie! Oh, your mother’s going to kill me!”

“Over here, Daddy!”

I find her in the corner of the room, dirty but unharmed. With her all right, I quickly Vanish the smoke in the room and put out any fires, then turn back to my daughter.

“There’s no need to tell Mum about this, is there?”

She shakes her head and smiles, trying to hide something behind her back. But gazing down at her, I can see what it is. Powdered bicorn horn.

“Roxie,” I begin slowly, “did you switch the powders?”

She freezes, then bobs her head, barely hiding a smile.

I feel my face flush as I realize what happened. My daughter—my daughter—pranked me!

“Are you mad, Daddy?”

“Mad?” I laugh and spin her around in my arms. “I’ve never been so proud!”

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Name: Lia
House: Ravenclaw
Title: Joke's On You
Era: Next-Gen (with mention of Trio and Marauder eras, 'cause I'm gifted like that)
Word Count: 593
Ratings/Warnings: 1st-2nd Year/None
A/N: There's something oddly satisfying about writing this from Filch's PoV.

Quote:

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Sure, I know who ya are. You're Potter's boy - the oldest one. I ne'er forget a face.

C'mere, and 'ave a seat. I don't bite, lad, so stop givin' me the evil eye. Fine, don't sit. Lemme just tell ya somethin': I recognised ya immediately by the way ya walk, even before I got a good look at that face of yers. Ya 'ave a swagger to ya, lad - a strut. Reminds me of yer uncles - the twins - and especially yer grandfather, James. I guess it's rather apt that yer named after him, innit?

Now, c'mon and just 'ave a seat. Sit with me a spell, would ya. Over 'ere on the steps, where the sun is nice and warm spillin' in through the window. My arthritis bothers me less in the sun.

Yes, right 'ere beside me. Mind the splinters - there might be a few. I 'aven't got round to sanding them yet. My arthritis, ya know. I'm really just a fixture 'ere now. Every year, they expect me to retire, but why leave the only place I've been accepted at?

Would ya stop fidgeting! Yer sent to me, remember? Yer punishment is 'aving to spend the afternoon with a crotchety ol' Squib. And what exactly did ya get in trouble fer? Doing what yer uncles and grandfather did best!

Don't ya back talk me, lad. There may be no magic in me, but I can still make yer life a living hell 'ere, so mind yer manners and sit yer arse back down on the stairs. Good. Can ya sit still fer a few minutes and listen? Kids dunno how to respect thar elders nowadays.

Yer a lotta trouble and aggravation, you know that? Just like yer uncles. Trouble and aggravation are mostly made up of ordinary things. Undramatic things. And all it takes is a smart arse like ya to blow thing outta proportion and make a huge mess that I end up 'aving to clean.

But what ya lot forget - yeah, yer lot: yer uncles, yer grandfather, even yer da' - is that life 'as a way of correctin' itself. Karma is what they call it. Ya see, when ya mess with someone, the laws of nature get ya back - two-fold.

Don't sit thar and tell me that yer innocent or that them Slytherins deserved to be pranked 'cause they're Slytherins. It don't matter if they deserved it or not. What matters is that ya broke the rules o' nature, and nature gets sore at ya when ya do that. Very sore.

What will she do? Oh, yer just a young lad yet, and I un'erstand that yer not versed in such subjects as karma or retribution, but ya do un'erstand punishment - don't ya? Yeah, I thought you would. Now, don't tremble, lad. It won't be that bad working fer me fer the rest of the year ... and into the next. That is, o' course, if ya last that long at Hogwarts.

A whole year workin' as my assistant caretaker, yes. Ye'll be reportin' to me ev'ery day after class. All yer free time will be spent helpin' me. Already talked to yer parents about ya stayin' during the summer to work. Ya won't be gettin' into any mischief then, now will ya?

Lad? Lad?

Merlin's pants, the boy fainted. Figures. His line ne'er was burdened with an over abundance of brains. For jokesters, not one of 'em could ev'r take a joke very well, especially on April Fool's Day.

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Name: ToBeOrNotToBeAGryffindor
House: Ravenclaw
Title: The No-Pants Dance
Era: Next-Generation
Word Count: 747
Ratings/Warnings: 1st/2nd Years – Very Mild Profanity
A/N: I may or may not have giggled a bit toward the end. This was actually fun to write. :D

Quote:

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“Al, I need your help.”

He had always known this day would come, the day his proud, supposedly smarter little sister would require his assistance. But the furtive, embarrassed look on her face made it all the more delicious. Most of the time, she refused to associate with him at all. Not that he would’ve wanted to hang out with his younger sibling, mind, since he was a fifth-year and she a third-year.

“Hmm,” he started with mock innocence. “Depends on what you want, I suppose.”

“I need to get one over on James.”

Now far more intrigued, Albus asked, “What’s he done this time?”

“He Vanished my braids!” Scowling, she hissed, “How could you not notice?”

It was just then that Albus realised that his sister’s hair was significantly shorter than when they had arrived at the school a few weeks prior. Of course, he owed James one in his own right for a stolen quill and the non-fortuitously timed appearance of a tail — namely when he had been asking Sadie Wilkins to Hogsmeade the previous school year.

“All right then,” he agreed. “Any ideas?”

A wicked smile Albus had never seen before spread across Lily’s face. “As a matter of fact, yes.”



“All clear!” Lily whispered to Albus as she scouted out James’s dorm room. As it was a gorgeous afternoon on likely the last nice weekend for a while, James was at Quidditch practice and everyone else was out enjoying the fair weather, affording them the perfect opportunity to strike.

Once the door was closed, Lily went straight for James’s trunk. Her nose wrinkled in disgust, she Levitated the stack of James’s underwear out of the trunk and onto the floor. As was his part in the bargain, Albus trained his wand on the pants and said, “Geminio!” Instantly, a second stack of Y-fronts appeared. Then he again aimed for the first pile and said, “Evanesco!”

Had Lily not explained it, Albus wasn’t sure he would’ve understood the point of this. But once she had told him what she had in mind, it made perfect sense. Since Albus had only learnt Duplication Charms that year, the effect would not be as strong, and the copied underpants would fade into nothing after a few hours, but that was all they needed. Vanishing the real underwear… well, that was just for fun. After practice, James would come back to his dorm and head straight for the shower, complete with a fresh change of clothes. That was where Lily came in.

From the pocket of her robes, she produced a small phial of Bulbadox Powder. “Say, where did you get that, anyway?” he asked.

“Fred.”

“What’d you give him for it?”

“Did an essay for him.”

“Ah.” Albus knew better than to question how she was able to do sixth-year work. Considering Fred’s usual marks, it was likely to be an improvement anyway.

Lily removed James’s favourite pair of jeans from his trunk and sprinkled a slight dusting of the powder on inside of the seat. The moment the copied pants disappeared, it would become very uncomfortable for James in all the worst ways when they did. Albus admired Lily’s gall for both concocting the scheme and having the guts to carry it out.

Once everything was in place and the poisoned trousers were on the top of the pile to ensure that they were taken first, the pair of them darted back to the Gryffindor common room, Lily to her Transfiguration essay and Albus to his Defence against the Dark Arts assignment. It was all Albus could do to keep a straight face when James and his troupe stalked in less than an hour later when the sun started to go down.

About fifteen minutes later, James returned to the common room, freshly showered and bearing his Quidditch notebook with all of his plays and strategies. He and his teammates huddled around it, discussing various manoeuvres, but the hush around them didn’t last long.

About twenty minutes in, James shot out of his chair, furiously scratching his behind before resorting to rubbing it against the stone walls. Then the screaming started, and now large crowd of students all turned to watch the eldest Potter running around the common room, laughing as he screeched in agony.

Sharing a conspiratorial glance with Lily, Albus smiled to himself. He knew this would come back on him, but knowing James’s arse was covered in boils was so, so worth it.

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CLOSING!!!!

Results soon, and points will be posted for Summer term.


~Madam Carmerta~

Results!

Well, this was fairly easy. Even with the promise of participation points there weren't many entries. Taking this into account, I'm only awarding first place.

Any queries, PM me.

1st Place - Equinox ... Oh okay, *sigh* I like my little joke.

1st Place - for real this time - No Pants Dance - ToBeOrNotToBeAGryffindor

Points ...

Wow, this is hard to calculate *sarcasm*

Gryffindor - 0
Hufflepuff -0
Ravenclaw 30
Slytherin - 0


~Madam Carmerta~